


Fangs, Thorns, and Monster Horns

by FractalMancer



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Timelines, Awkward Romance, Crimes & Criminals, Death, Death Threats, Discrimination, F/M, First Love, Friendship, Gun Violence, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, Major Character Injury, Male Frisk, Metafiction, Multiple Endings, Organized Crime, Post-Pacifist Route, Romance, Serious Injuries, Sexual Tension, Skeleton Puns, Spaghetti, Terrorism, Threats of Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-08
Updated: 2016-06-25
Packaged: 2018-05-05 15:17:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 40,933
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5380001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FractalMancer/pseuds/FractalMancer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After a young pacifist completed his journey through a subterranean world of loneliness, misunderstanding, and lots of puzzles, the end would prove it all to be a blessing in disguise. As the veil between civilizations vanished before him, Lord Asgore began the steady reintegration of monsters with the humans on the surface, with the help of the human, Frisk. Over the course of a year, and with much determination, the struggling new community worked to earn their own homes, businesses, and careers. At last, with Frisk as their faithful human advocate, the monsters could make greater strides forward than ever before, starting in the duplex village that Asgore dubbed “Monsterville.” Although the monsters did their best to prove their worth on the surface, everything else came down to fate.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Weekend Company

**Author's Note:**

> I've read a bunch fanfictions, and I've also written some original stuff. This is my first time writing under a fanfic format, so I'll probably have to work my way into it and gather critique. With my growing interest in Undertale and enthusiasm towards crack pairings, I'm going to try my hand at fanfiction and perhaps turn out with a decent length story with romance, humor, and authenticity. Hopefully this will be as entertaining for you to read as it will be for me to write.

Frisk awoke slowly when the sun from his bedroom window finally reached his eyelids. It was the weekend at last. This meant, among several things, more free time and less homeschooling. Plus, he could finally get something for breakfast that didn't involve escargot. He swapped his striped pajamas for his striped shirt, which he now wears in a size larger than when he arrived at the Underground. He combed his shoulder length hair before heading downstairs where Toriel had her nose in a French cookbook. 

“Good morning Frisk,” Toriel greeted, rocking in her antique chair. “Did you rest well? I am looking at a new species of surface snail I would like to try for dinner tonight-”  
Goat mom was cut off when Frisk darted into the kitchen to retrieve his coupon book off the counter top. He returned and proudly showed Toriel.  
“Oh yeah, I better not get carried away,” Toriel began, “Sans said he will be over in a bit, he just had to make sure Papyrus got ready for his weekend shift. He told me his brother is living his dream working at Grillby's now that they serve pasta.”

There was a knock on the door that separated the other house on the duplex. Toriel got up to greet her visitor, but stopped in front of the door. Two more knocks landed on the door in timely succession.  
“Who's there?” Toriel asked, covering her growing smile with one hand.  
“Ice cream.” Sans responded.  
“Ice cream who?”  
“Ice cream through the door so you can hear me!” Toriel giggled from his terrible knock knock joke. It was for this reason that she made certain those skeleton brothers were her next door neighbors.  
“Welcome as always, Sans,” she said. Things may have changed greatly in their lives but they still held on to their time honored traditions.  
“Much obliged, Butterscotch,” Sans grinned with a wink. Sans had grown fond of Toriel's butterscotch cinnamon pie. One day he thought he might let her teach Papyrus how to make it.

As Sans entered through the door that connected the duplex and then approached his neighbor's front door where Frisk was putting on a pair of shoes, Papyrus followed him in. He was wearing his chef's hat and a fake curly mustache.  
“BONJOUR MADAME, JE SUIS MONSIEURE PAPYRUS.” The tall skeleton removed his hat, took a bow, then kissed the back of Toriel's claw. Papyrus suddenly remembered that he didn't have lips, so he decided to wing it by gently rubbing his incisors against her fur.  
“That's enough, bro, you already brushed your teeth.” Sans quipped. Toriel appreciated Papyrus's gentlemanly gesture regardless. “Also I think you may have the wrong nationality there,” Sans added.  
“OH DEAREST BROTHER, PASTA IS AN ART, AND ART KNOWS NO CULTURAL OR LINGUAL BOUNDARIES!” Papyrus enlightened.  
“Don't you mean linguinial boundaries?” Sans corrected, reciprocating more laughter out of Toriel. Papyrus nyeh-heh'd sarcastically.  
“So kiddo, what's for breakfast? Muffet's bakery? I think she's still doing her breakfast deals.” Sans guessed.  
Frisk nodded and reached for the coupon book in his pocket. He searched through the massive collection of coupons, some of which he let expire. Frisk hunted until finally he showed Sans the coupon clipping with “Buy one Spider Everything Bagel™, get a free Purple Spider Venom Tea™” on it.

“Woah, I like the way you think kid. But hold on, is Toriel okay with you drinking that? That kinda stuff will have your soul spinning cobwebs in seconds, you know?” Sans warned.  
“What are you two talking about over there?” Toriel asked, concern rising in her tone.  
“Frisk here wants some purple drank.” Sans replied.  
“Frisk, not until you are 13. Sans, promise me that if they try to use that coupon, you make sure they do not get a single sip of it, okay?” Toriel asked.  
“Can do, haven't broken a promise before have I?” Sans reassured. He opened the front door and called for Papyrus, “Come on Papyrus, you don't wanna be late.”  
Papyrus skipped out the door, onto his driveway, and into his red convertible. He ignited the engine with a luxurious roar, then got onto the road. He stopped in front of Toriel's mailbox.  
“Be good, everyone!” Toriel called as the trio walked down the concrete porch of their comfy duplex. “And Frisk, be safe, you know how that girl Muffet can be sometimes!”

Frisk waved goodbye from the back seat and Sans hopped into shotgun. Papyrus made the engine roar one last time before taking off through the quiet streets of Monsterville. They passed house after house, and although they all looked identical among the greenery, Frisk considered each of them one of a kind because of the unique citizens they housed, most of whom he was acquainted with. The sight was completed by a picturesque display of Mt. Ebott towering in the distance.

“Hey kid, I've actually gotten to know Muffet a little better these past couple weeks. I see where Toriel was coming from, but damn, if only she knew about that girl's appreciation for spider puns!”  
Frisk stared curiously at Sans.  
“She told me that you're her only human regular who orders off of the monster menu. Of course she encounters some one-time exceptions here and there, but none of them seemed to show the kindness towards monsters that you do.”  
Frisk was saddened by the fact that humans did not wish to try her spidery confections, which forced Muffet to come up with a more human-friendly alternative selection. At least the spider girl got one good thing out of it, which was an extra 20% on every non-monster item. Papyrus removed his eye sockets from the road to witness Frisks frown for the half second it was there, making the skeleton determined to protect that smile.

“HEY FRISK, ISN'T IT GOING TO BE YOUR BIRTHDAY SOON? ABOUT A WEEK FROM NOW?” Papyrus remembered. Frisk nodded his head as his smile returned.  
“IS THERE ANYTHING YOU WANT ME TO GET YOU, OR WOULD YOU FANCY A SURPRISE? PERHAPS ANOTHER ONE OF MY DELICIOUS TRAPS OR A HIGHLY ELABORATE BIRTHDAY PUZZLE OF MY IMPECCABLE DESIGN?”  
“That sounds like a birthday gift Frisk will never forget,” Sans teased, “I've been thinking about that as well. Maybe I'll give them a gift they'll find quite humerus.  
“SANS, WAS THAT A PUN? PLEASE, NOT WHILE I'M DRIVING.” Papyrus grumbled.  
“Alright, alright,” Sans said, “Be sure you take the next turn onto Curtson Way, also Frisk and I will be dropping by Muffet's Bake Shop.  
“SANS, WHAT DID I JUST SAY TO YOU ABOUT PUNS?” Papyrus whined.  
“Seriously Papyrus, that's what the road's been called this whole time. Muffet opened business there right when the place was paved. Ya know personally I'm a fan of the name.” Sans defended, throwing in a wink and a shrug on the last remark.  
“WHAT?! I WORK ON A RESTRAUNT THAT IS ON A STREET THAT IS A SPIDER PUN?!” Papyrus shouted, outraged.  
“Hey, man, cheer up,” Sans consoled, “at least Grillby didn't get to name the road, I would've convinced him to give it a skeleton pun name.”  
Papyrus considered this, and agreed the situation would've been a lot worse. And at least he did not know anyone named Curtson.  
“HEY FRISK, SINCE I AM BASICALLY THE MOST AMAZING AND TALENTED FRIEND YOU'VE EVER MADE,” Papyrus boasted, “WITNESS THIS! CONSIDER IT TO BE AN EARLY BIRTHDAY GIFT!”

After making a quick turn onto Curtson, Papyrus began to speed up down the stretch. The path was bordered by nothing but a grassy ditch on each side, separating the clean, relatively new road from the dense forest. The number of trees dissipated until they reached the strip mall where every business monster made their livings, including Muffet, Grillby, and Mettaton (who ran nearly half of all monster-human economics on the surface). Even Burgerpants still worked at MTT Surface Burger Emporium™ . Papyrus loudly sped into the parking lot, towards an open space perpendicular to Grillby's and Muffet's. Sans looked ready for something; his eye sockets went dark, like the hole atop Mt. Ebott.

Papyrus worked the wheel rigorously, causing a deafening screech from the tires as the hot rod spun into the sparsely occupied lot. The centrifugal force had incredible power on the shimmering vehicle's center of gravity, even one as low profile as Papyrus's. The lanky skeleton was just as surprised as anyone when he noticed that gravity seemed to have deactivated. They had become airborne, as well as upside down. Sans' eye socket ignited.

The car, along with the bodies of the bewildered passengers, were all effectively rotated, flipped, and finally stopped by Sans' telekinetic powers. They ended up situated flawlessly in the parking space. Papyrus's eyes were wide with shock, and Frisk's jaw had long since dropped. A few quiet moments went by before San's pupil returned to normal. He took a deep breath and exited the car. 

“OH MY GOODNESS FRISK I...” The skeleton was collecting his thoughts, “...I HAVE REALLY OUTDONE MYSELF THIS TIME! WE WERE UPSIDE DOWN!”  
“Yeah, we saw,” Sans said, “Now get on over to Grillby's bro, you'll be late. And you know what I told you happens when you're late on you're first few weeks of duty...”  
“YES SANS, I KNOW THAT GRILLBY IS MADE OF FIRE, YOU DON'T HAVE TO TRY TO RUIN PEOPLE AND PLACES FOR ME WITH BAD PUNS,” Papyrus said, putting on his chef's hat and mustache for his spaghetti making duties. “ANYWAY, HAPPY ALMOST BIRTHDAY, FRISK! I HOPE THAT WAS A THRILLING DEVIATION FROM YOUR NORMAL WEEKEND ROUTINE!  
Frisk gave Papyrus a thumbs up as he marched gleefully into Grillby's. Sans held Frisks hand and gave him some real-talk.

“You understand what I did there, right kid?” Sans asked.  
Frisk nodded.  
“Good,” he answered, “I have to get him to quit that kinda thing, at least around you. Now that car ain't cheap, but imagine what would happen if I wasn't there to do my thing.”  
Frisk pondered on that prospect, and didn't like what he thought of.  
“Yeah, let's just say that you're guys' time would've been less than favorable. I just gotta ask you this once to keep this whole thing from Toriel--I don't know what she'd do to Papyrus if she found out what kinda stunt he tried to pull. Think you can do that?” Sans asked, his smile wearing down, but never lost.  
Frisk nodded slowly. He loved Toriel, but he had also seen what she could do to people she didn't like, or in his own unfortunate case, tries to protect. Sans started walking towards the door of Muffet's bakery.  
“I'm still keeping that promise I made all that time ago, kiddo. Not just for Toriel, but for you,” Sans said, “Now let's get us some grub, or, spiders I guess.”

It had already been a long day for Frisk, and it wasn't even noon. In the state of mind he had just been plunged into, Frisk wondered if it was such a great idea to ask what he had wanted to ask that day, of that particular week, to Muffet. The same Muffet he met in that castle in the Hotlands. The one he'd been seeing almost every weekend since she opened business on the surface. The one who offers a wide selection of human items at her bake shop, which Frisk decides to let the 20% off coupons pile up for just to taste her authentic spider baking. The one greeting him and Sans through her front door right now. Oh well.


	2. The Most Important Meal of the Day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm happy to see that my first chapter was well received! Here's the second one I finished today, tell me what you think.

The Spider Everything Bagels™ were almost ready. Muffet waited next to her brick-patterned deck oven as two wide trays of the aesthetically speckled doughnut knockoffs completed their cycle. Over the year she spent expanding her business to the surface, she had taken measures to accommodate the needs of new human customers. Thus, a revolution of exotic confections and baked goods of human origin had blessed the racks of her bake shop, each of which inspired their own arthropod reciprocals. There were orders for Spider Cinnamon Rolls, Spiderdough Pretzels, Spider French Toast, Spider Claws, Spider Food Cake, Gingerspiders, Spider Fritters, and more recipes and designs than the young spider girl could count on all 30 of her fingers. Of course, each name adorned with an accentuating Trademark. Muffet's creations were even giving the famous Glamburger a run for its money, and those were sold in the MTT Surface Resort just down the street. So much money was being made that there was enough left over to afford her aforementioned deck oven, better spiderweb infrastructure in The Underground, and a noticeable increase in spider population. This would, of course, ultimately provide the customers with more of the spider products they enjoy. The cycle continues. Speaking of cycles, Muffet heard a beep on the timer and opened the oven.

Once the tray had been pulled from the oven, the entire bakery flooded with the warm, heavenly scent of freshly baked cobwebs, chopped seasonings, and spider carcasses. As Muffet acknowledged her job-well-done, she witnessed out of the bakery window the regularly scheduled arrival of her favorite, most open minded human customer. And Papyrus was driving. Uh-oh.

Sans used his mastery of “Skelekinesis” to flip Papyrus's car right side up. Another vehicular disaster averted by Sans, as expected. After Papyrus departed to his day job at Grillby's next door, Muffet hoped another day that the skeleton wouldn't burn the whole strip mall down trying to boil water.  
After Frisk and Sans were done talking, they walked hand in hand to the front door of Muffet's bakery. Muffet greeted them both as she let them into her surface parlor. 

“Salutations Frisk and Sans, I hope that incident outside didn't get you guys too shaken up~”  
“Oh, no big deal,” Sans assured, “I don't know if I can say the same for Frisk though. I don't think they saw Papyrus try to pull something like that off before.”  
Muffet looked at Frisk, her five eyes configured slightly downward as they met his.  
“I think I know what will heighten your spirits~” Muffet said to Frisk, “I've got two-dozen everything bagels fresh out of the oven... Baker's dozen that is. Care to try one?”  
Frisk nodded, then took his coupon out of his pocket with the $3.49 for the bagel. Muffet put a hand up to her mouth and giggled.  
“No, silly~” Muffet said, lowering her voice. She shifted her five eyes left to right, making sure no other customers were still around from that morning. She leaned next to Frisk's ear, and whispered, “It's... on the house~”  
Frisk was breathing heavily through his nose. Never in a million years did he think Muffet would make an exception for him, no matter what kind of day he was having. She was by no means a soulless swindler, but to Frisk, it was sort of a big deal.  
“Your day is obviously getting better already... Ahuhuhu~~” Muffet laughed. She took the coupon from Frisk's hand, but not the money.  
“Hey Muffet,” Sans started, “would you mind if you just, you know, gave the venom to me? I swear it's only because Toriel doesn't want Frisk around it yet.”  
“Personally I think Frisky should live a little, but I understand... It's almost their 13th birthday anyway~” she said.

Muffet rubbed one of her hands on Frisk's hair before turning around and leaping over the counter. Her pigtails, ribbons, and fluffy red dress waved in the current as she flew over the counter, where breads and confections were brazenly displayed behind its glass pane. She stuck the landing and took off into the kitchen, only to return in acrobatic style with an everything bagel on fine china and a pot of the venomous purple tea. She was holding the pot in her top right hand while she poured it into a web-patterned teacup, which she held in her right center hand. It was the most incredible 5 seconds of Frisk's weekend.

“Wow, Papyrus could definitely learn a thing or two about stunts from you!” Sans said, thoroughly impressed.  
“Not everybody can be born with the dexterity of a spider...” Muffet boasted, “Speaking of Papyrus, how is he doing over at Grillby's? Did he start any spaghetti fires yet?”  
“Maybe a few, but not to worry,” Sans smiled and winked, “It's a good thing that Grillby is an excellent fireman.” 

Muffet handed Frisk the plate with the bagel and Sans the tea. Sans thanked Muffet and headed over to a window-side table with Frisk. The tables were circular sheets of glass with a lacquered wooden frame. They rested directly on top of a black metal base, bent into a spiderweb-pattern that showed through the bottom. Instead of stools or chairs, the two customers sat on comfortable red tuffets. The spider girl had grown to take themes and aesthetic very seriously.  
Frisk took the butter knife from the folded napkin of silverware on the table and cut the bagel in half horizontally. He opened a small block of butter and spread it evenly on both halves. Finally, he could taste the harmonious flavors of the freshly baked Spider Everything Bagel™. Despite the free bagel and Muffet's outstanding customer service, Sans had still detected trace amounts of uneasiness in Frisk's pure soul. 

“So, uhh,” Sans began, “Is something the matter? Spiders aren't creeping you out all of a sudden are they?  
Frisk shook his head and pointed back towards the parking lot out the window, where the red car was parked. He lowered his head and took another bite of his bagel.  
“Come on, you've been through way worse times than this,” Sans consoled, “I know Toriel, she wouldn't be mad at you or me or even Papyrus for that long. We'll tell her what happened this morning after I get things sorted with my bro, capiche?”  
Frisk offered Sans a smile, then continued with his bagel. Another few moments of silence went by until Frisk heard a teacup being pushed towards him on the glass table. He had offered the cup of venom to Frisk. 

“What the hell am I doing.” Sans sighed.  
Frisk contemplated in front of the cup, then finally lifted it by the handle. Without a second thought, he gave it back to Sans.  
“Thank god,” Sans said. Frisk finished his bagel.

Once Sans had emptied the cup into his mouth, which in effect made his pupils turn purple, but otherwise having no influence on his demeanor, the two friends got up. Frisk ran over to the counter and rang the little steel bell, signaling Muffet back to the register. Frisk gave her the plate and teacup, smiled, then shook one of her hands in gratitude.  
“Ahuhuhu~~” she giggled, “You certainly are the nicest human I ever get the pleasure of doing business with~”  
Sans, inebriated by spider venom, walked over and retrieved Frisk.  
“I'll see you later tonight to plan for Frisk's party with Papyrus, if I can even recall by tonight. You know how I am about arrangements, especially ones I make after a cup of that wacky purple drank.”  
“Ahuhu~ See you two later, drive safely~” Muffet said.

Frisk turned around and waved goodbye. He was glad to have monsters around him who cared enough to arrange his birthday party. It would be the first one he celebrates with his friends from The Underground. Meanwhile, Muffet had a successful evening taking orders and serving the humans and monsters who walked in and out of her bakery throughout the day. However, there was nothing that day she was more grateful for than Sans and Papyrus forgetting to show up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters this length take me over a quarter of a day to write and edit if I'm feeling into it. I don't want to make promises about when updates for the story will come out, because we all know how fanfiction authors are sometimes. However, I can safely estimate that I'll have something done every 1-2 weeks. This fic will not die, I can promise you that, but I am foreseeing a ballpark number of chapters. Nothing I can put up here yet though.  
> Next chapter, you'll start seeing the reason I put some of those fancy tags on. Stay tuned.


	3. Treading the Warpath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your patience and support! As promised, this chapter ups the ante. We aren't edgy enough yet.

When monster society migrated to the surface, the prosperity of their new dominion was dependent on human charity and trust. Seeing that this trust would take time to develop, Asgore selectively quartered the most skilled and well mannered monsters into the duplex village of Monsterville, several miles from the base of Mt. Ebott. The suburban domicile was built to take up a small area while still maintaining comfortable living space for the pioneers of the surface world. Asgore hoped the impression would prove that monster standards were equal to those of humans, and it succeeded gracefully. With human-monster affairs making speedy progression, monster rights soon expanded into real estate, commerce, car and homeowners insurance, patenting, and even higher education (Affirmative Action began applying to monsters as well, along with the Temmie Scholarship Fund). 

With all of the great things that came with the growing trust in the monsters, there was still suspicion on both ends. Modern humans may have remained skeptical of the true nature of monsters, having not coexisted for ages. It was this same paranoia that kept the monsters on their toes and influenced the reinstatement of the royal guard on the surface, which primarily consisted of Undyne and the dog people. Could the human denizens of the surface possibly be harboring abhorrence for monsters? If so, what if this ignorance evolved into hatred, fear, and ultimately violence that would send the first and final bastion of coexistence back into the catacombs of Mt. Ebott? If Frisk was any human reference to go by, that tragic prospect would be unlikely. Besides, aside from the scuffles that occurred upon the emergence of the monsters, no major acts of violence were committed against humans or monsters. It was striven by all to keep it that way.

It was nine-o-clock on the same Saturday Frisk and Sans paid their visit. The sky was dark and a storm cloud leaving behind a light drizzle. Sans and Papyrus had not shown up, so Muffet assumed the tea Sans drank made him forget their entire conversation that morning. He must have just gotten Papyrus from Grillby's at five while she was busy closing up shop herself. There was no harm done though, for she could easily reschedule Frisk's birthday discussion and planning for a weekday. Then, she'd make the skeleton brothers buy something or punish them for loitering. Muffet doesn't normally bring her pet out in broad daylight, but one day, somebody may deserve what's coming to them way more than she cares whether the customers are creeped out. Spider ignorance is a plague on the surface world.

Muffet finished washing the the dishes with remarkable six-handed speed and began emptying the register. She took the money and paced through the kitchen, eventually bringing the profits into a small janitor's closet containing her pet, some emergency utilities (other than her pet), and a safe which would soon be emptied for its contents to alleviate spiderkind's plight. From atop the safe, she grabbed herself an oversized burlap sack with three green $$$'s on the side. Muffet had memories from months ago when business was slower, and she could only use one $ on her bags. She sagely dropped the combination (which was just 8-88-8-8-88-8, but nobody else knew about the safe but her and her pet anyway) and started shoveling human greenbacks into one bag, then grabbed another and worked on filling it with monster legal tender, “G”s. With all three sets of hands elegantly relocating her month's savings, the safe was empty faster than one could say “You would make a damn good pickpocket.”

Muffet carried the bags to the register, where out the front window she saw something that struck worry into her soul.  
If all five of her eyes were not deceiving her, Muffet saw a human standing in the parking lot in front of her bakery. He wore a black beanie, a plain white tee shirt under a dark unzipped hoodie, and jeans of black denim. He approached slowly as he talked on his cell phone. Muffet looked on as the stranger had yet to notice her.

Muffet gazed at his face, lightly inhabited by a brown goatee. He was probably in his early twenties. Muffet tried to read the man's lips through the glare of the window, but over the 15 seconds he was on the phone she only managed to decipher as follows:

“-the place...Do I-...-only like, thriteen...-Fine, but I...” 

He put hung up and put down his phone. He stared inside. He walked up to the front door. He put a hand on the glass door, but Muffet held onto her integrity, remembering that—she forgot to lock it.

He pushed the door open with ease and stepped inside with his dense rubber boots. 

Muffet slowly peered above the counter, coming to a full stand when she discovered that the shabby stranger's eyes were on her.  
“Umm...” she mumbled, “Sorry deary, but we closed at five. I just hadn't...” she swallowed, spiting herself, “Locked the door yet...”  
The young man got closer to the counter, somehow without an apparent trace of hostility on his face (save for the goatee).  
“I know,” he said, “but actually, I'm here to do my job.”

The intruder reached into his hoodie's inner pocket, and before she knew it Muffet was on the business side of a glock. She stared down the barrel of the jet black weapon the way a human child would stare into the darkness atop Mt. Ebott. A part of her soul had wished Frisk, Sans, Papyrus or somebody would rescue her from the situation, currently taboo to monsters, while the rest of it hoped they wouldn't come around to join her in her fate. On the other hand, all of her soul hoped no humans were around to witness what she was about to do to the guy.

“I saw you carrying out bags of money. I'll be taking those,” The stranger demanded, “I don't want to have to kill you.”  
“Oh, those bags?” Muffet stalled, “They don't have any money in them... they're just full of burnt spiders I scraped off the bottom of the oven this evening~”  
“Then why were there three giant dollar signs right on the goddamn side?!” the robber shouted. the gun shook in Muffet's face, “I'm being as forward as I can. I know you're still quite young, but when a human shows up with a gun and asks for something, you give it to them.”

“I see...” Muffet said, lifting two massive bags onto the counter, setting them about two feet apart from each other. The human's disadvantage, as she understood, was that humans had a mere two arms with which to carry out a singular focus, whereas she had six and was a masterful multitasker. Additionally, Asgore had made certain that every business and household possessed some form of armament, and Muffet had prepared to secure her charity work from scoundrels using measures that far exceeded the recommendation. Undyne frequents Muffet's store on weekdays, having found common ground with the spider girl.

Muffet, without fear or distraction, reached into a small compartment behind the counter. It was nothing huge or particularly deadly, just a round, cold, fuzzy spider carcass about the size of a chicken egg. She gripped it firmly in her bottom right arm's hand. It was then that she placed the bags carefully on the counter.

The criminal put the gun back into his hoodie and grabbed both bags simultaneously with both of his hands. This left a two foot window for Muffet to aim at his upper torso. She pelted the spider at his chest like a baseball, except unlike baseballs, it exploded on impact. The bags were removed from his grip and remained safe on the counter as the stranger was knocked back into the glass window, where he realized he was stuck. The spider grenade, with the help of Alphys and her genetic slight-of-hand, was created to detonate on contact with a target and trap them in a spider web. It was much more effective than having victims tread through a blanket of web until they got stuck.

The robber was dazed. Muffet leaped in front of the counter and somersaulted before landing front and center near her thief, bags of cash in hand. As a spider monster, Muffet's fear factor was far greater to humans than the other way around, a lesson that the first human who crossed her would have to learn the hard way. Her prisoner struggled to escape the web. Nothing happened.

Muffet covered her mouth and giggled at him.  
“You humans wouldn't know the power a monster if it bit you in your sleep! Ahuhuhu~” Muffet was hysterical, “you think that one of you is enough to attempt thievery even from a monster my age, do you deary? I disagree with that notion. Hang tight while I grab something from my closet...”

Muffet swung a bag heavy with Gs at the man's face, leaving his cheek gashed and bruised. She took her time walking to the back of the store. Meanwhile, the guy on the front window was trying his best to escape. He maneuvered his arms until one slipped into his sleeve and reached for the hoodie pocket opposite of his gun, where he found his three inch serrated army blade. He painstakingly hacked through the impossibly thick web from the inside, picking up the pace as she heard Muffet snapping metal pieces into place from inside the closet. When the poor man finally freed himself, he promptly bailed on the operation, leaving behind his knife.

When he stormed out the glass doors he bolted to his unimpressive car, at least in comparison to Papyrus's sports car parked across from him. Before he could reach the door, he saw a little boy standing alone in the rain. Dread and regret filled the man's soul. 

“Oh my god...” he whispered, hyperventilating as the boy simply stared with his squinted eyes, “I... can't believe it. I can't believe my dad and that other psycho are making me...”  
All the boy did was stare, holding out his arms in an attempt to bestow mercy upon the strange man in the black beanie. All the man did was pull a gun from his pocket and slowly, calmly raised it to the boy's head. What was once a drizzle was becoming nothing short of an isolated shower, the moonlight still reflecting off the falling droplets.  
“Why did I have to be the one to find you first?!” He screamed at the boy. In response, the kid jumped back startled. 

The tantrum was interrupted by a much more powerful, ear slamming crack that could be heard for miles. Silhouetted in the light coming from her bakery, Muffet and her pet stood on the sidewalk before the two frightened gentlemen. She was carrying an pistol grip tactical shotgun, brazen with purple camouflage. The first shot knocked the gun right out of the conflicted criminal's hand, breaking the weapon and amazingly leaving his hand in one piece. 

“Ahuhuhuhu~” Muffet cackled contemptuously, “Another thing you should know about me, deary, is that I have five eyes, which equates to many times the accuracy with a firearm than you'll ever have...”  
Muffet stepped further into the rain, her pet following in her footsteps. She took aim at her prey, causing him to pace backwards toward his car. The man tripped in a puddle and fell against the driver side door. As he stared at the lunatic he made the mistake of trying to rob, five eyes stared down on him.

“As a businesswoman and charity worker, I understand what hard work is... and I will NEVER let my Frisky's hard earned Gs get stolen by the conniving likes of you!~”  
Muffet pumped the shotgun once more, purposefully making the cartridge from the last round fly into his the man's face with the smell of gunpowder. She took aim once more.  
“Please, I'm not the one you want! I didn't have a choice, but I promise I won't come back here!”  
“Say salutations to Satan for me, spider hater! Ahuhuhuhuhu~~~”

Muffet's final words to the the first human threat to Monsterkind were interrupted by the soft touch of a person she had failed to notice through her manic rage. Someone she hoped would not see her under such belligerence just before it all started. She felt small arms around her body and his head buried into her her shoulder; she noticed two familiar pairs of eye sockets on her. Had she not noticed Papyrus's car pull in? Sans had driven it home with Frisk, right? Alas, Frisk was present by her side, crying into Muffet's dress as she lowered her gun. Five eyes and she still never saw him standing in the rain, not even when he was about to be killed. And now he saw here for what she truly was. It was the namesake of her entire race after all. 

“Oh for crying out loud,” Sans sighed, “Why is everybody having a bad time today?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed this chapter! In the next one, there will be questions answered and a closer look at the new direction this story is taking. If you think Muffet is OOC, keep in mind how much we can still speculate; I pictured her as a person who would get more overbearing the more personally she took something (Yandere if you will). Anyway, until next time, merry Christmas (or happy holidays, you know, just to keep things PC in this narrative).


	4. Getting Some Bearings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter, about a week later, just like clockwork. As the title suggests, this one is going to get things recombobulated and unwound.

Since the disorienting altercation, Papyrus, Sans, Muffet, Frisk, and the criminal had been taken in for questioning by the head of the reinstated Royal Guard herself. When Undyne had found them, she was more concerned with her friends' state of dejection than the actual criminal, who had been completely disarmed by that point. Undyne effortlessly booked the robber and brought him to the back of her police cruiser, which she pimped out to her aqua-warrior tastes like she had with her old house. The rest took Papyrus's car on a quiet, somber ride back to Monsterville, following the fish chief. Muffet brought her pet along for the ride, holding it close in her lap the whole way. 

It was almost 11 o clock by the time Undyne had all the tired witnesses in the station's/her house's well-lit interrogation room/closet, ready for questioning. A bona fide district police station had yet to be a necessity, and although Undyne wouldn't admit it, she was thrilled to have a reason to propose the idea to Asgore yet again. The four monsters and Frisk all sat in comfy, cushioned chairs, Undyne's being the comfiest of them all behind her desk. On the other hand, the robber sat on a short, barely-ergonomic wooden stool. To add insult to injury, Undyne had built the stool with one leg a couple of centimeters shorter than the other three. There was no way any criminal scum who sat in it would have the gall to make a complaint. Plus, she got to yell at them whenever they made too much noise with it.

“So, let's reassess what happened,” Undyne hissed, “YOU went and attempted the first violent crime in our entire year up on the surface, correct? WHAT, YOU GOT A BEEF WITH MONSTERS OR SOMETHING YOU LITTLE PUNK?!”  
Undyne slammed her hands on the table, her menacing expression almost showing her excitement to be in business again. The criminal flinched as her shouts left drops of spit on his face. His chair rocked back.  
“UM...” Papyrus spoke up, “HOLD ON UNDYNE, YOU WOULDN'T WANT TO BE THE PERPETRATOR OF A SECOND VIOLENT CRIME, WOULD YOU?”  
Undyne relaxed back into her chair, slowly putting her hands back on her lap.  
“Alright then,” Undyne breathed, “Muffet, since you were the victim of this ordeal, tell me what happened.”  
After giving her side of the story, from the closet to the bombs to the shotgun, Muffet concluded.  
“In hindsight, he didn't seem too enthusiastic about crime in the first place... I even recall what he said to a stranger on the phone. He didn't want to threaten a little girl. Is this correct, mister...?”  
The handcuffed man in the stool regarded Muffet's pause, filling it in.  
“Harrison,” piped the human, “My few friends call me Harry.”  
“Alright Harrison,” Undyne sneered, “Maybe we should hear from Frisk, the friend of mine you were allegedly going to murder in cold blood for no apparent reason...”

Frisk recounted that he had gone over to Muffet's part of the strip mall after he heard a slam on her window. He watched Harry emerge from the web cocoon, the young goatee'd man appearing tense and frightened. Frisk had assumed it was just caused by Muffet showing the poor guy her pet. Foolishly ignoring his suspicion, he attempted to calm the stranger's nerves with a little heart to heart (or soul to soul), which was when Harry pulled the gun on him. Finally, Frisk expressed the concern for Muffet that he felt in the last moments of the twisted scene, and how only thing he could do was hold her tight and hope he would get through to the selfless, merciful soul he knew she had.

“Wow.” Sans praised.  
“WOW.” Papyrus stated.  
Muffet blushed.  
“Wow indeed,” Undyne remarked, “but let's back up, what were you three doing there on Curtson Way in the first place? Did somebody contact you?”  
“Heh heh, oh boy,” Sans laughed, “Hey Papyrus, care to let us know?”  
“FIIINE!” Papyrus sighed, “I STARTED ANOTHER SPAGHETTI FIRE OVER AT GRILLBY'S AND THIS TIME IT GOT A LITTLE OUT OF HAND. GRILLBY WAS UPSET SO I HAD TO WORK OVERTIME TO CLEAN OR HE'D FIRE ME 'IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE.' SANS DROVE OVER TO PICK ME UP LATE AND FRISK TAGGED ALONG WITH HIM.”  
Sans' smile grew as his brother drew out the explanation, and Undyne was on the verge of a fit. Harry threw in a few chuckles of his own, attempting to blend in with the rest.  
“HEY,” Undyne snapped, “YOU SHUT UP! And stop rocking in that stool, it's pissing me off!”  
“UH, ANYWAY,” Papyrus added, “IT WAS PAST FRISK'S BEDTIME THOUGH... I WONDER WHY TORIEL LET HIM RIDE WITH SANS PAST CURFEW. NOT ALWAYS A GREAT IDEA, FRISK.”  
Frisk looked around nervously, uncomfortable even in his comfy chair.  
“Yeah, speaking of not-so-great ideas...” Sans whispered, reminding himself to have a chat with Papyrus about proper driving behaviors. 

Frisk, recalling another potentially vital detail, chipped in once more. He told the knight in shining scales Harry's statement about his dad in the heat of the moment. His father “and that other psycho.” Undyne squinted upon hearing the information.  
“Thanks for the tip, kid,” Undyne said, “Clearly this is HARRISON'S first time committing a crime, given how much he runs his mouth. Am I right Harry boy?  
“Th-That's right. It wasn't my decision though, I-”  
“Now now,” Undyne interrupted, “save it for the REAL interrogation! I'm talking a dimly lit room, lights in your face, cigar smoke, fedoras, note taking... maybe not fedoras, but ASGORE is going to be there and you are not going to show a SHRED of contemptuous behavior in his presence, and certainly NO STOOL ROCKING!”

The soft sound of a knock fell upon the room and the closet door clicked open. The head of a yellow lizard girl peered in on the subjects.  
“I-is everybody d-done in there?” Alphys murmured. “If you aren't that's fine, but it's getting l-l-late and...”  
“No, Alphys, we're just about wrapping this up,” Undyne reassured, “Boy have I got some news, though. Poor Muffet seems to have fallen victim to the first crime against the monster colony!”  
“Oh! Muffet!” Alphys piped, “D-did you get a chance t-to use those genetically modified spider bombs I h-helped make?”  
“Why, yes I did Alphys,” Muffet replied, “and our first live human test subject over there helped give a splendid demonstration of their effectiveness! Ahuhuhu~”  
“Can I suggest adding knife resistance?” Harry offered insincerely.  
“P-perhaps,” Alphys said, “but I was considering adding corrosive properties to the web as well! How c-cool would that be?”  
“We can watch the anime you get this stuff from together some other day,” Undyne cut in, “but right now I'm tired as hell. Criminal scum, you're sleeping in the dungeon downstairs. The rest of you can sleep easy; there's no way he can pull a fast one behind bars like those.” Alphys gulped, then smiled nervously at Harry.

Undyne, Muffet, the skeleton brothers, and Frisk all rose from their seats. They strode out of the closet and headed to the front door. Undyne was dragging Harry by his handcuffs. Alphys opened the door to let her tired guests out.  
“Goodnight g-guys!” Alphys shouted. Undyne stuck her head out the door.  
“HEY PAPYRUS! If you're ever short on jobs, give me a call!” Undyne yelled.  
“OH, WE'LL SEE!” Papyrus retorted, sensing his friend's lack of confidence in his pastamancing, “I'VE BEEN PRACTICING! AND I HAVE REASON To belie...” The skeleton's voice faded as Sans drove his group of friends down the street in the red convertible. 

The three monsters and Frisk drove slowly through the village, the moon shining true above Mt. Ebott. Papyrus rode shotgun, Sans was at the wheel, and Frisk sat beside Muffet in the back.  
“So Muffet, need a place to stay? I think Toriel would be nice enough to let you turn in for the night at her and Frisk's place. Is that alright with everyone?”  
Frisk was blushing intensely, but was thankfully unnoticed under the cover of night. Muffet, with her pet in her lap, pondered on it.  
“Well, I'm going to need some room for my pet to sleep as well. Would that be alright with you, Frisk?”  
Frisk looked at Sans, doing his damndest to keep on a pokerface, and a red one at that. The human nodded, giving his hesitant approval. Muffet hugged Frisk in gratitude, her pet snuggling in on his lap.

Hours before, it had taken Toriel a lot of convincing to let Frisk out after his curfew, even with Sans to back him up. Unfortunately the opportunity he and Sans devised was squandered by some bad timing and a more pressing development. A slight fallacy was uttered during Frisk's recollection, as it was not coincidence nor a noise that guided him over to Muffet's bakery that night; it was merely the privacy he needed, that he should have had that morning, to reveal something personal to the spider girl. It was one week until Frisk's 13th birthday, and the boy was determined to make his annual milestone a special one, and hopefully not just for himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that the plot is square and some questions are answered, the next chapter is going to be a bit more fun. I may take my time with it, but feel free to comment and critique! I will read and acknowledge your input.


	5. Hospitality

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for my absence, I had some other work occupying my schedule, inspirational drought, et cetera. Fanfic authors, right? Anyway, I didn't make the big chapter yet, but instead I have some important transition that needs to happen that I may have overlooked two weeks ago. Don't panic for one moment, people. This fic is going places. Not the top 10 of Undertale, but places.

Toriel ran to the door as soon as she saw Sans pull up in Papyrus's car to drop Frisk off. She had not heard details about what happened at the strip mall; Undyne had only alerted her that Frisk was a witness to an altercation in the area and was going to return home after a short questioning. Fearing the worst for her adoptive human son, she lifted Frisk into the air with no hesitation or chance of letting go.

“FRISK!” cried Toriel, “My child!”  
Her words could not express her concern, her relief, and most strongly, her guilt. She had vowed never to allow Frisk into danger's sight since they left the Underground. She knew Frisk was safe and responsible for his age, but the overall nature of monsters was not quite compatible with the frailness of a human body. Thus, she took caution of the activities Frisk got involved in with his many monster friends, but she appeared to have made a misjudgment this once.  
“Sans, Papyrus,” the goat mother continued, “is everybody okay? Is Frisk okay?”  
Frisk hugged Toriel back, looked up with a smile, and raised his small thumb in confirmation.  
“Yes, Frisk is okay, but I would advise going into detail tomorrow morning. Papyrus and I have been worked to the bone tonight,” Sans said, blinking to stay awake.  
“AWWW DANGIT SAAANSSZZZzzz...” Papyurus attempted. He was too exhausted to complain about the pun, and fell asleep in shotgun.  
“Well, anyway,” Sans picked up, “Frisk and I have a friend who is sort of far from home right now. She could really use a place to crash, and I thought that you guys could give her a way to spend the night.”  
“Of course!” Toriel replied, “There should be room for one more in our parlor. Who might this friend be?”  
“Umm, yeah,” Sans nervously adjusted his hoodie, “speaking of parlors...”  
The skeleton pointed to the back seat of the car with his thumb. Toriel looked over the door to see a half-slumbering spider girl. Her pet was sleeping in four of her arms while the other two supported her head like a pillow.  
“You know Miss Muffet, right?”

“I...” Toriel stammered, “What, may I ask, did she have to do with the so called 'altercation?'”  
“Look, guys, hate to do this to ya, but I've gotta catch some Z's. Skeletons gotta dream about their bony sheep too, ya know?”  
Sans raised an arm, carefully lifting Muffet and her pet out of the car and onto the wet grass. He drove a short distance before parking the car in his driveway and telekinetically carrying his brother with him into their house.  
“Goodnight!” Sans shouted to his neighbors, still standing on the lawn. He shut the door behind him.  
Muffet climbed to her feet as her eyes adjusted to the waking world. She saw Toriel, who's face was brazen with annoyance.  
“Well, it seems I have not a choice...” Toriel breathed. She set Frisk down, “Let us go inside, my child, and Muffet.”

The three of them (and Muffet's pet) walked through the front door on their half of the duplex and took off their shoes, careful not to get the floor wet. Muffet turned and walked around her host's living room, viewing her favorite customer and friend's home for the first time. Compared to her current residence, which was still in the Underground (although her surface bake shop was viable living space), the ambiance was astonishing. Glowing yellow lamps were set up around the room, emitting warm, cozy contrast to the darkness outside. Two windows behind the sofa, which she would be sleeping on that night, kept the parlor sufficiently lit during the day. The hardwood floor had not a scratch on it, making it the perfect amber mirror for the fire burning under a brick mantle. Toriel's rocking chair was at rest beside the crackling flames. In addition to the homey décor, the aroma of butterscotch and cinnamon was permanently instilled in every room, with the help of few candles. Muffet smiled in wonderment until Toriel spoke up.

“Now I would not get too comfortable,” she scoffed, still suspicious of Muffet, “There is a blanket on the quilt rack next to the mantle, and there should be another for your cupcake pet. Sleep well, because tomorrow I will be looking for some answers.”  
“That's quite alright, dearie~” Muffet reassured, “I'll be up bright and early tomorrow, and I promise we'll find ourselves on better terms~”  
Frisk took a couple steps over to Muffet and gave her a quick hug and a pat on the back. He ran upstairs to his bedroom, where Toriel followed him.  
“Goodnight Frisk,” said Toriel, “I am so glad that you are safe.”  
Frisk smiled and gave his caring mother a nod. Toriel shut the door and the lights went out.

Muffet was the first to awaken as the sunrise shone through the windows at half past five in the morning. Luckily for her, spider quiescent periods were not as dependent on schedule as much as they were on stimulus. She stood on both feet, careful not to disturb her pet slumbering beside the sofa, and went to the kitchen. She perused the cabinets and refrigerator, looking hither and thither for a way she could earn Toriel's respect in advance. She knew that by the time she found out the whole truth, nothing was going to get easier for anybody, especially Frisk on his special day in less than a week. She could plan a fundraiser, nay, a business inside and out, and she would be damned if her skills and organization wouldn't give Frisk the best party with the monsters he's ever had. She held a snail recipe book in one hand as her other five went straight to work. 

Toriel was the second resident to awaken, except this time it was to a smell other than butterscotch and cinnamon. She was almost ready to be mad if her “surprise guest” had used her kitchen supplies without her permission. However, with a scent as new and savory, yet familiar as this, she restrained her judgment. She climbed out of her bed, put on her Delta Rune robe, and went downstairs, curious to see what Muffet was up to.

“Good morning Toriel!” Muffet greeted, “I was up so early and I thought I would prepare you something to repay you for your hospitality...”  
“I see...” Toriel said with a hint of suspicion, “I hope you understand that-”  
“Oh, not to worry... I will reimburse you for any ingredients I used regardless. I can also promise you that I am a sage in many forms of culinary art, although I specialize in bread and pastries! Ahuhu~” Muffet cheered.

Toriel moved into the kitchen and sat at the dinner table. There, she saw exactly what the aroma was coming from; she had the recipes bookmarked in her snail cook book yesterday morning, and had just gotten the ingredients for it. Toriel was more conflicted than before, as she had wanted to make the recipe herself. On the other hand, it was exactly like in the picture: a heliculture breakfast platter, consisting of an omelet with mushrooms, sharp cheddar, snail eggs, and immature Cornu aspersum, hash browns, home-style escargot, and a sniscuit (portmanteau involving “snail” and “biscuit”) in which there was a seasoned sausage patty cooked from Helix pomatia, grilled to perfection. Most people wouldn't even know what some of those words meant, but Muffet sure seemed to. She had cooked all of that, and Toriel didn't even know what else.

“I am... speechless!” Toriel said, taking in the details of the snaily bouquet, “I had no idea you could cook this well! How old are you, child?”  
“I am the same age as Frisk will be next week, plus a few months!~” Muffet answered.  
“Alright,” Toriel responded, “that is one way of answering the question. But here is another you may like to answer... what were the details on last night's situation?”  
Once again, Toriel meant business. Muffet collected herself and remembered how she was going to deliver the news to her.  
“Well, Toriel... do you know why I made breakfast this nicely for you?”  
“I never figured it was purely out of the kindness of your heart, but how come?  
“It was my way of giving you some perspective~” Muffet stated, “As much as you are going to enjoy this breakfast, you are going to despise every word of what I'm about to tell you...”

Toriel listened on, grabbing a fork and cutting herself a bit of Muffet's omelet. She lifted the piece to her mouth and hoped that the young woman was as good at cooking with snails as she was with spiders. She swallowed. It tasted like mollusk heaven.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For next time, I may just combine what may suffice for 3 chapters into one "super" chapter, by this fic's standards anyway. I will probably have more free time in the coming weeks (here I am making promises again!), but don't worry. I'll write chapters semi-regularly until every good idea I have is put onto the screen. In the mean time, you all do your thing in the feedback section!


	6. Happy Birthday Frisk! (Part 1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go!

“My goodness...” Toriel whispered after Muffet's recollection. She had listened on through the whole story without making a single interruption, nervously eating breakfast in the meantime. Frisk was still asleep in his room, unlikely to show up for another couple hours that Sunday morning. Muffet blinked each of her five eyes at different intervals, then all at once, as if trying to remove something from them that was disrupting her vision. The problem wasn't in her eyes, though, it was the awkwardness hanging so densely the air she could cut it with a knife. 

“Umm...” She said, then waited. Toriel had a frustrated look on her face. Or was it an annoyed one? Angry? Maybe she was just thinking?  
“Well... say something!” the spider girl burst.  
“I was right to assume that you would have reacted that way towards a menace, especially of the human variety,” Toriel began, “Do not think I forgot about how you and Frisk met.”  
“So...” Muffet sighed, “are you angry?”  
“How could I be angry at the person who saved my child's life?”  
“Oh, thank god!~” Muffet beamed.  
“I still want the other perspectives on the story, including Frisk's. But for now, as much as I would like to thank you, I must warn you never to act as belligerently as you described. That goes on the behalf of all monsters and humans. Understood?”  
“Yes, Toriel~” Muffet smiled, “Does this mean Frisk and I can still see each other?”  
“Well, of course-” Toriel said, carefully noting the girl's choice of words, “-hold on, what do you mean 'see each other?'”  
“Ahuhuhu~ you know...” Muffet chuckled, “Frisk will see me at the register, I'll see them over the counter in that sexy striped shirt...~”  
“You are just messing with me, are you not?” Toriel questioned cynically, cocking an eyebrow, “I may consider postponing the day I will allow him to drink that purple 'tea' of yours.”  
“Ahuhu~ No, come on!” Muffet complained, “13 is the legal monster drinking age, Asgore said, remember?”  
“Asgore happens to say a lot of things these days,” Toriel scoffed.  
“I'll make Frisk breakfast every weekend for you if you forget what I said~”  
“You already do that!”  
“I'll expand my store's menu with snail confections!~”

Back and forth Toriel and Muffet jested, finally understanding new parts of each other after all those months on the surface. At last Toriel saw Muffet as a talented young lady with a small problem regarding her temper, whereas the young spider now knew Toriel as more than Frisk's overbearing, snail-loving goat mom. Muffet left shortly after the last laugh (which was, of course, Toriel's), unable to stay and watch Frisk get up and smell breakfast. She returned to the Underground to deposit her disposable earnings to her spider family, returning to the surface only to operate her business and prepare for Frisk's special day. For Frisk, all told, one week could not have felt longer. 

 

Frisk, exactly like the week before, awoke slowly when the sun from his bedroom window reached his eyelids. It was the weekend at last. This meant, among several things, more free time and his 13th birthday to celebrate. Plus, as always, he could finally get something not snail-related for breakfast. He swapped his striped pajamas for his striped shirt, which he now wears in a size larger than when he arrived at the Underground... Although it felt already. He combed his shoulder length hair before heading downstairs where Toriel—was not present.

Frisk tiptoed down the rest of the stairs, peering into his living room lit only by sunlight through the windows. Several lonesome birthday decorations were set up about the room, including bundles of colorful Mylar balloons and a celebratory tablecloth banner hanging from the ceiling which spelled “HAPPY BIRThday FRISK!” It came to reason that the person who painted the banner dreadfully underestimated the amount of space capital letters occupied. Frisk stepped onto the hardwood floor of the living room, which had become cold overnight due to an inactive fireplace. So there Frisk stood, wondering what exactly a monster's idea of a party was. Just set up some decorations and let the kid throw his own party? He knew things were different within the depths of Mt. Ebott but this is ridicul--

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY FRISK!” 

\--And before he knew it, the room's atmosphere jolted back to life with the defibrillating sound party horns, and Frisk realized he'd just fallen for. Lights clicked on, confetti was emerging relentlessly from places unknown, and many of his monster friends emerged from the kitchen, the staircase, behind the sofa, and even the other side of the duplex. Among his present friends were Toriel, Undyne, Alphys, Muffet, Papyrus, Sans, and even Asgore. His face lit up with joy and genuine surprise; Frisk had never experienced a surprise party before. If the monsters could arrange a fiesta well enough to pull something like that off, then Frisk figured it wouldn't do any harm to increase his expectations for the day. Sans and Papyrus were the first to approach the boy, still thoroughly flabbergasted. 

“LOOKS LIKE WE GOT THEM GOOD THERE, AY SANS?” Papyrus suggested.  
“Are you sure? I thought he could feel in his bones that something was up,” Sans joked.  
“I'M JUST GOING TO PRETEND YOU'RE USING THAT EXPRESSION WITHOUT ANY INTENT OF CRUDELY IMPROVISING SKELETON HUMOR,” Papyrus said, “HOW ARE YOU FEELING THIS MORNING FRISK? DID YOU LIKE WHAT WE SET UP HERE FOR YOU?”  
Frisk hugged his towering skeleton friend around the legs and nodded.  
“We did our best,” Sans leaned over to Frisk, “but as for that banner up there, let's just say that ALL-CAPS doesn't look so good on paper, right bro?”  
“SSS...” Papyrus suppressed, “WELL FRISK, YOU'LL BE DELIGHTED TO KNOW THAT THIS IS NOTHING COMPARED TO WHAT WE HAVE ARRANGED FOR THE REST OF THE DAY.”  
“Indeed,” Sans agreed, “plus, I've got a whole gang of skeleton jokes I've been working on that are bound to tickle your funny bone-”  
Papyrus looked at Sans with intensifying rage, eyes bugging out from their sockets. Sans ignored him...  
“I guess you can call it a skeleton crew!”  
“AAAAHHHH!!!” Papyrus yelled, “LET'S GET THIS PARTY STARTED!!!”  
“LIVE FROM MT. EBOTT IT'S SATURDAY MORNING!!!”

Before Frisk could make any guesses as to what his friends were planning for his special day, everyone was already on their way out the front door. The small crowd of guests paraded to their vehicles, bringing Frisk outdoors with them. Summer daylight caught his maladjusted morning eyes, making it difficult to see Papyrus when the skeleton lifted him up onto his shoulder blade. They moved across the lawn into the skeleton brothers' driveway.

“HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT SANS,” Papyrus proposed, “SINCE FRISK IS VIRTUALLY A LEGAL ADULT BY MONSTER STANDARDS, THEY SHOULD RIDE SHOTGUN FOR TODAY! WOULD YOU MIND?”  
“Eh, sure,” Sans replied, “I can still do my thing from the passenger's seat.”

Papyrus rested Frisk in shotgun and fastened the seat belt. Then, he fastened a second seat belt that strapped horizontally across Frisk's waist. The human learned from Toriel to keep safety in high regard, but it still struck him as unusual. Were they on the passenger seats as well? Perhaps the model was designed to provide safety on the eccentric terrain of the Underground. Either way, Papyrus was revving up the engine as Sans hopped into the back seat, looking determined as ever. The three accelerated peakward to the highest point on Mt. Ebott.

“OKAY FRISK, ALLOW ME TO GIVE YOU A BASIC RUNTHROUGH OF ALL THE AMAZING ACTIVITIES WE HAVE PLANNED FOR YOU!” Papyrus cheered, “FIRST, WE ARE GOING TO THE TOP OF MT. EBOTT FOR A BREAKFAST PICNIC, THEN EVERYONE WILL GO TO GRILLBY'S FOR LUNCH. THEN WE'LL VISIT METTATON'S RESORT FOR AN AWESOME DANCE PARY WITH PILES OF SNACKS, CAKE, AND GIFTS! YOU WON'T BE PECKISH FOR ONE SECOND TODAY, I MADE SURE OF IT!”  
“Good job summing that up bro,” Sans remarked, “but then there's also the chance Frisk falls down the hole again and we just have to spend all day getting him out again. For that scenario, I've been preparing an elaborate performance featuring all of the Monsters Frisk met in the Underground, reenacting every event of their adventure last year in order. I got every skeleton joke told, every attack and swing choreographed, and just about every character has a song. The title for it that I'm leaning towards now is 'Undertale,' like a tale in the Underground. Then again, Frisk might not fall in.”  
“DON'T BE RIDICULOUS SANS!” Papyrus rebutted, “NOBODY WOULD WANT TO SIT THROUGH THE BORING OLD DAYS IN THE UNDERGROUND! BESIDES, WRITING A PLAY ON SUCH SHORT NOTICE? YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS!”  
“Actually, Papyrus,” Sans said, throwing in a sly wink, “I'm dead serious.”  
“WHATEVER, I WILL NO LONGER DIGNIFY SUCH A FOOLISH WASTE OF YOUR PLANNING TIME WITH ANOTHER RESPONSE! AT LEAST I ALWAYS HAVE A FEW SURPRISES UP MY SLEEVES.”

Papyrus wound his way up the narrow path beside rows of overgrowth and a vertigo inducing cliff. Frisk was breathing heavily at the thought that he would one day have to practice driving. Once the path became wider and the mountain began to plateau, Papyrus continued to press on the accelerator. He had a glint of orange in his eye.  
“Oh Great Papyrus, it appears we started our way up the wrong mountain! The peak of Mt. Ebott is over yonder!” Sans forced.  
“THAT'S ALRIGHT, DEAREST BROTHER, I HAVE AN IDEA. ARE YOU READY FOR THIS FRISK?”  
And all the boy could do was stare petrified at his lunatic friend and wish there were even more seat belts. Then, Papyrus looked over to Sans.  
“SANS, ARE YOU READY?”  
The skeleton in the passenger's seat, with his blue jacket rustling in the wind, set his blue pupil ablaze at will.  
“Ready as I'll ever be, bro.”

Into view there came a dry dirt ramp in the middle of the newly paved stretch of road atop the smaller mountain. Frisk was sure that when everything was over, he'd have a good laugh with Sans about it as a magic skeleton. After the car zoomed gracefully up the dirt incline on Ebott's makeshift Autobahn, they caught air. 

Frisk's shoulder-length hair fluttered vigorously in wind. As the birthday kid looked over the car door, he witnessed a sight he thought was only possible by helicopter. Low clouds beneath him shaded areas of dense forests that conformed slightly with the hue of a moist summer atmosphere. Birds could be seen flocking only meters away, moving parallel to the flying car. These sights calmed Frisk down enough to realize at last that Papyrus and Sans had everything under control.  
“Enjoying the view, kid?” Sans smiled, concentrating on keeping everything balanced and afloat on a cushion of air. Frisk nodded rapidly.  
“Do you understand why we got that extra seat belt installed?”  
Frisk thought he understood, and waited for Sans to answer his own question. He's reminded every day that people can do that more easily than they think.  
“It's because Toriel wouldn't have it any other way,” Sans revealed, “See kid, I can be honest with her! She may occasionally overlook your preferences for the sake of safety, but I think she's finally starting to learn who exactly has your backbone in these situations.”  
“SHOULD I START TAKING PICTURES NOW SANS? LET'S CONSIDER THEM FRISK'S FIRST BIRTHDAY PRESENTS!”

Picture after picture, selfie after selfie, panorama after panorama, even a bird-to-face split second photobomb was immortalized as the three of them tore through the clouds.  
As the top of Mount Ebott approached, the trees on the ground grew from unkempt lawn to broccoli patch to shrubbery to distinguishable trees as they descended. There was a second dirt ramp leading into a clearing where many monsters from the Underground were already awaiting the trio's arrival. The landing stuck with precision with the help of Sans' skelekinesis. The car slowed to a stop.  
“HAPPY BIRTHDAY FRISK!” The crowd shouted.

“Now how's that for a surprise party, kid?” Sans asked, “You know, we can do that every weekend if you wanted, and you could even bring Muffet along for the ride next time. A girl like her could certainly appreciate a ride like that.”  
Sans gave Frisk a small nudge and a wink. He didn't understand.  
“Uh,” Sans muttered awkwardly, “I'm just going to act like there wasn't a joke in there. Come on kid, let's enjoy the picnic.”

Activities continued by the shade of the forest, a safe distance from the famous entrance to the Underground (fenced off with 10 gauge chain link). Among the congregation of monsters there were lawn chairs, collapsible picnic tables, and a little edible contribution from everyone. There was a table adorned with a careful arrangement of freshly baked bread and confections from Muffet and Toriel. Grillby was working the barbecue (with...Sans?), and a table heaping with spaghetti. Next to it there was a bench supporting an unplugged microwave, surrounded by jars of marinara and bags of Parmesan cheese. 

Frisk walked over to the baked goods table and grabbed a whole-wheat long bread and a slice of butterscotch cinnamon pie. He approached Mt. Spaghetti, grabbed a paper bowl and plastic utensils, pulled back a sleeve, and stuck a fork deep into the sticky pile where the spaghetti retained heat. After filling the bowl, Frisk added a bit of marinara and mixed it up with the pasta. Once he used a knife to cut open the bread, he put the saucy noodles in the whole wheat bun and sprinkled some cheese in it. He walked over to the grill, where he made eye contact with the one and only Grillby. The bartender stared at the young boy and said nothing.  
Then Frisk stared said nothing.  
Grillby stared back without a sound, flames blowing in the breeze.  
This eye contact went on for about a hundred years according perspective.  
“Hey,” Sans jumped in, breaking the silent tension, “I think Frisk wants some meatballs for their sub.”  
Grillby nodded, then pushed in his glasses up the bridge of his nose. His eyes were obscured by the reflection of the sun. He slammed his flaming hands into a pile of ground beef and lifted two fistfuls of uncooked meat. The burning man rolled the clumps in his hands, masterfully mixing in pinches of herbs and seasonings as he went along. He tossed four delectable spheres onto the grill then jettisoned himself into the air. He threw fireball after fireball, blast after intense blast at the charcoal briquettes while creating the thrust to stay airborne. How these martial arts tactics managed to cook anything evenly was a mystery.

Grillby picked up all four meaty creations with a spatula in one fell swoop, then gently applied them to the spaghetti in Frisk's sub. He reached over and drizzled some barbecue sauce on the sandwich. Frisk wore a smile, showing that he was impressed.  
“Woah Grillby, you're on fire today,” Sans complimented, “Think you can get me the usual?”  
Grillby grabbed a bottle of ketchup from under the grill and mixed it with the barbecue sauce and some balsamic vinegar. He grabbed a crazy straw, stirred the concoction lightly, and adorned the glass bottle with a tomato slice on its lip.  
“It ain't shaken, but it'll do, thanks,” Sans critiqued, “Come on Frisk, let's find a place to sit.”

Frisk and Sans saw a couple of open chairs next to Undyne, Alphys, and Monster Kid. Undyne was telling the young lizard a story warranting of many aggressive pantomimes: a fist to the hand, a pretend headlock, and the thrust of an imaginary spear. Alphys was laughing along, helping the armless monster eat bites of a hotcat. Frisk finally made it into earshot.

“Yeah,” Undyne sighed, “DEFINITELY one of the best animes I've seen in a while. We should show you sometime.”  
“Y-yeah,” Alphys said, “It only takes a week to watch. Less than that if you're r-really into the manga as well. I got so many ideas from it. OH! H-hello Frisk! Happy Birthday! A-again!”  
Frisk smiled at the three of them and moved an open lawn chair next to monster kid. Sans just plopped down.  
“How have things been holding up, Bestie?” Undyne asked. Frisk gave her a thumbs up and took a bite of his pie.  
Undyne continued, “I helped Papyrus add to that mountain of spaghetti over there. I also hunted that meat Grillby's using. It awesome that the animals don't try to make conversation with you on the surface! Oh, and I made some tea, too.”  
Frisk paused for a moment in the process of eating his meatball sub, but continued chewing despite the dodgy facts.  
“D-did Papyrus tell you yet?” Alphys mentioned, “I got Mettaton to give you the party floor of his Surface Resort! He and Napstablook will be mixing some absolutely f-fire beats up in this p-p-piece!”  
Alphys smiled awkwardly as everyone silently registered her nomenclature.  
“Th-those were his words, not mine!”  
Monster Kid laughed, “Yo, I understand what he's saying, I can't wait! I'm going to get Napstablook and Mettaton's autographs... … And then I'm going to get Undyne to autograph their autographs! This is the best day ever, yo!”  
“Oh come on, squirt, you see me every day!” Undyne reminded Monster Kid, “And besides, if there's anyone you should be asking for an autograph right now, it's Frisk.”

“OH YEAH!” the lizard kid beamed, “Yo, I can't forget your autograph Frisk! Happy Birthday! I heard cool stories about you around Undyne... … She said you survived an attack from an armed robber around the spider girl's bakery...”  
Undyne was caught off guard by the words, and Alphys was dreading the awkward tension that was sure to come. Sans looked up from his half-empty bottle.  
“Yo, guess what! Like a week ago... … the guy who did it was put under interrogation by Undyne and Asgore! He didn't come out of that looking so hot!”  
“Alright, kid...” Undyne growled through a tooth-bearing grin, “That's more than we needed to-”  
“Yo!” Monster kid proceeded with vigor, “I also heard Lord Asgore say that everything is probably going to get way worse! I can't even IMAGINE that right now!”  
Undyne was livid, trying to shut the lizard up with her mind instead of her fists. Sans smile started to contract. Alphys made an attempt to fix the situation...  
“...I-I-”  
“YOOOO!” Monster kid burst “Almost forgot to mention! We found out yesterday morning in Undyne's basement dungeon that... … THE GUY ESCAPHTD-”

Undyne clasped a hand over Monster Kid's mouth. He continued to mumble into her hand as she called, “YOUR MAJESTY, A LITTLE HELP WITH THIS?”  
Asgore, who appeared to be in a conversation with Toriel, noticed from across the pit. Attention was attracted from other guests at the party, some of whom left the Underground for the first time to attend. Muffet's attention was grabbed from her position at the bread table. Alphys had reached awkward critical mass. The King walked around the fenced-off hole. Toriel followed.  
“What is the problem Undyne?” Asgore questioned. Undyne silenced Monster Kid and put him back down, deescalating the situation.  
“Our guest here just told Frisk everything, I think we need some damage control.”  
“Even yesterday's...”  
“Yes.”  
“Golly...” Asgore said, lowering his head, “I just made Toriel aware of the situation. She wanted tell Frisk after today. I did not want those matters to interfere with the celebration.”  
Frisk sat down somberly, motioning Asgore to let him know that it was no big deal.  
“I am sorry, child. I just want to let you know that you need not worry about a thing here, I have Monsterville's Guard occupying all festivities for your birthday. You have nothing to be afraid of.”  
“Thank you Asgore,” Toriel said graciously, “I can help Frisk from here.”

Frisk put his paper plate on the chair and filled a cup with some of Undyne's tea, which was next to her own chair. All he wanted to do was move on.  
“My child, how are you feeling?” Toriel asked.  
Frisk lifted a hand horizontally and teetered it. Quite irritated, actually.  
“Asgore is correct. You need not fear for the rest of the day. Although, I believe a certain lizard owes an apology.”  
Monster Kid tilted his head in shame and apologized, “Yo... … I'm sorry. I was just hyped about everything, and words just kept coming out.”  
Frisk pat his friend on the shoulder and smiled thoughtfully.

“GUYS, GUYS!”  
Papyrus weaved his way through the crowd of fellow monsters.  
“I DON'T BELIEVE IT! ALL THE SPAGHETTI I MADE IS GONE! PEOPLE MUST HAVE REALLY LIKED IT!”  
Sans extinguished his pupil and focused on his brother.  
“Wow, bro, congrats! I think this means we should move on to the next activity.”  
“INDEED! YOU SEE THAT GRILLBY?! PEOPLE DO LIKE MY SPAGHETTI!”

Frisk migrated over to the chain-link fence which surrounded the dark hole at the peak of The mountain. He saw a nasty pile of cold spaghetti covered in marinara sauce and broken glass. Beside it was the familiar bed of yellow flowers that once cushioned his fall. He smiled at the circle of flowers that reflected the sunlight as he reminisced. 

And, unbeknownst to Frisk, one of them smiled back.

*Happy Birthday...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See you next part! Leave feedback!


	7. Happy Birthday Frisk! (Part 1.5): Lunch at Grillby's

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is sort of an intermission chapter. It contains stuff I want to have happen before the next, sorta long chapter. More on that at the end.

After the mountain was cleaned up, Frisk, Sans and Papyrus finally rolled into the strip mall parking lot, where Grillby was already back on duty. Muffet was busy arranging the main event down the street at Mettaton's Resort, running back and forth to pick up some supplies and food she had stored for the occasion. The three looked around at the intimidating canine regulars, many of whom the skeletons and the human knew dearly. That, however, didn't prevent their puppy dog eyes from focusing in on Papyrus's long, alluring femurs. They met up with Grillby from behind the counter.

The three customers sat on the well-upholstered bar stools. Sans ordered Frisk a burger, fries, and a bottle of ketchup to go “with the fries.” Papyrus gave his silent employer a suspicious stare.  
“GOOD AFTERNOON, GRILLBY. I'D LIKE A PLATE OF SPAGHETTI AND MEATBALLS, PLEASE...” Papyrus requested.  
Grillby affirmed and turned towards the kitchen, but glanced back at his customer when he spoke up.  
“EHEM, MAKE THOSE AUTHENTIC ITALIAN MEATBALLS, EXTRA SPICY.”  
Grillby raised an flaming eyebrow at his unusual specification, but it was nothing he wasn't able to handle. He took a step towards the door when--  
“OH, GRILLBY! ACTUALLY, MAKE THAT ANGEL HAIR PASTA WITH EXTRA MARINARA SAUCE, BUT NOT TOO MUCH EXTRA.”  
Grillby gave Papyrus an irritated gaze and took a deep breath (with the extra oxygen, he burned slightly brighter). Papyrus spoke up again.  
“ALSO, DON'T FORGET THE AGED PARMESAN CHEESE, BUTTER, AND SOME FANCY SEASONAL HERBS TO ADORN THE MASTERPIECE THAT I AM CURRENTLY ORDERING!”  
Having enough, Grillby took two stiff, angry strides towards the kitchen door. Several of the dogs in the restaurant had their attention on the two of them. At last, Papyrus said:  
“ONE LAST THING, I WANT MY PASTA TO BE IN COOKED IN ONE, SINGLE STRAND. I WANT TO BE ABLE TO SLURP UP THE ENTIRE NOODLE WITHOUT A SINGLE BREAK! THINK YOU CAN HANDLE THAT, GRILLBY? WHO'S THE BEST PATAMANCER NOW?!”  
The incendiary bartender was halfway through the kitchen door. He paused, giving Papyrus the most ominous stare he had ever received from him. The not a word was spoken, but the bright glare on his glasses and the expressionless, suppressing demeanor said it all as he shut the door slowly.  
Sans silently chuckled. 

Grillby returned moments later, giving Frisk and Sans their food. All he gave Papyrus was a slow-motion passing glance before getting back to work.  
“Heheheh.” Sans laughed. Frisk and Papyrus directed their attention towards the Sans, who was usually the one making the jokes.  
“WHAT'S SO FUNNY?” Papyrus asked, “I WANT TO SEE HOW GRILLBY CAN HANDLE MAKING SPAGHETTI TO MY STANDARDS.”  
“Oh, nothing bro,” Sans replied, “It's only that you just made the worst mistake of your life.”  
“WHAT'S THE WORST THAT COULD POSSIBLY HAPPEN? THIS IS SUPPOSED TO MAKE HIM UNDERSTAND MY PLIGHT! WITH A KITCHEN LIKE HIS, IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO MAKE A DECENT PLATE OF PASTA! THERE ISN'T EVEN A GOOD MICROWAVE!”  
“That's alright, man. I'm just here to let you know that you're completely boned.”

Frisk was halfway done with his burger when he suggested the he and Sans sit over in a seating booth near the window. Sans agreed, leaving Papyrus to face the music on his own.  
“What's up kid? Nervous already?” Sans asked.  
Frisk nodded his head and pointed out the window. Outside, Muffet was carrying a large cooler above her head from her shop next door. Sans shrugged, closed his eyes, and smiled thoughtfully.  
“Believe it or not, kid, I understand what you're going through. I think all you gotta do is make a good impression at the party. Show her what you got.”  
Frisk shrugged and shook his head.  
“Hey, it's cool, Mettaton can teach you everything you need to know about dancing in like a minute. I know his cooking shows didn't work so well for Papyrus, but hell, you've got more guts than both of us.”  
Frisk smiled, breathing out a chuckle.  
“And also, you're completely forgetting about something. Remember what Toriel told you a week ago?”  
Frisk raised an eyebrow.  
“Uhh, um, Saturday morning,” Sans stammered.  
Frisk thought, then finally recalled Toriel's warning about tea.  
“That's right. We'll all be receiving a some liquid dancing skills that afternoon, courtesy of Muffet.”  
Frisk was at ease, remembering how well he danced during the struggle when he first met Miss Muffet. A little spider bite in the punch never hurt anyone.

“SANS! FRISK! I DON'T BELIEVE IT!” Papyrus shouted, running towards the booth. He was carrying a platter of thin spaghetti, made exactly as he requested it to be. By this time, Frisk was already done with his burger and fries, and Sans his ketchup. Papyrus put the platter down in front of them and sat down next to his brother.  
“IT WOULD SEEM THAT GRILLBY IS A MUCH MORE IMPOSING CHEF THAN I ANTICIPATED,” Papyrus admitted, “HE MUST WATCH METTATON'S COOKING SHOW MUCH MORE EXTENSIVELY THAN I! I WONDER IF UNDYNE GIVES HIM LESSONS TOO.”  
“Well, great going, Papyrus,” Sans congratulated, “Bone appetite.”  
Papyrus scoffed at his pun, but not without raising the question, “HOLD ON, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK THIS IS BAD NEWS? YOU AREN'T SUGGESTING THAT THIS PASTA IS A TRAP, ARE YOU? I KNOW A THING OR TWO ABOUT SPAGHETTI TRAPS!”  
“Well, I think there's only one way to find out.”  
“IF YOU INSIST. WHERE'S THE END OF THIS THING?”  
Papyrus put the end of the noodle in his mouth, and began slurping up his spaghetti. He stopped only to lick marinara sauce off his mouth, and occasionally chew with meatball. The pile continued to shrink for a good three minutes, until the last inch of noodle was ingested. The only thing left on the platter was a sauce-covered piece of paper, a couple meatballs, and a lonely noodle fragment.  
“AH-HA! YOU SEE GUYS? I KNEW GRILLBY DIDN'T HAVE WHAT IT TAKES!” Papyrus taunted. He picked up the paper and unfolded it.  
“Here we go.” Sans whispered.  
“10000G?!” Papyrus read.  
Sans sucked in some air through his teeth and pointed reluctantly to the platter, “That's not all, bro.”  
Papyrus lowered the bill from his face, slowly exposing the singular noodle which spelled out a phrase that has echoed through the minds of ex-employees throughout the ages. Clear as day and in graceful calligraphy, was the cursive message:

“You're fired.”

It was punctuated with meatballs. 

As Papyrus sprinted out to the parking lot in horror, Sans let Frisk in on a valuable lesson.  
“Frisk, you gotta promise me something. Always treat your boss with respect.”  
Frisk nodded. Sans didn't have to tell him twice.  
“On the bright side, at least Monsterville's got its first new trainee for the royal guard,” Sans said, “Let's go to Mettaton's Resort for the party after he relaxes.”

“RATS!” Papyrus panicked, “HOW WILL I EVER BE ABLE TO PAY OFF MY SPAGHETTI DEBT NOW?!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I've been meeting up with some realities of writing quasi-regularly as of late, two of those two things being other stuff I gotta do, and not wanting to make chapters feel forced. Luckily, with a little more time and thought I can bring this drought to an end, and bring you the final part of Frisks birthday arc soon. From that point forward, I won't make any more promises here, but I will still do my best to bring this tale to an exemplary completion. I don't want to make this a diary or anything. Leave some feedback if you feel like it!


	8. Happy Birthday Frisk! (Part 2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's day!~~~<3

The sun was setting outside of the MTT Surface Resort. Inside, an entire section reserved for parties (next to the Burger Emporium) housed the first rave-like celebration that the surface colony has ever thrown. When Frisk, Sans, and a lackluster Papyrus entered to the black-lit room beyond the velvet ropes, Mettaton was already there to greet them personally. He rolled past the crowd of monsters with his 4 by 5 screen visage, which was the look he used for business.

“Greetings, gentlemen and Frisk.” The robot invited, “I believe you are the final guests to arrive. This is strange, considering that Frisk here is our guest of honor!”  
Mettaton handed Frisk a bundle of purple MTT Party Essentials® Glamour Glow-Sticks™, now with extra Glam Glitter©. Frisk cracked two and pocketed the rest. He waved a glowstick around in each hand.  
“Hey Mettaton, Frisk here has to learn how to dance, really fast, do you think you can show them any moves?” Sans asked, “They want to make an impression.”  
“I doubt Frisk has anything to learn from me. You should have seen our face-off back in Hotland; their display of branded products was impeccable!” Mettaton complimented, “Unless he is willing to learn what it's like to do 'the robot,' all day everyday, forever.”  
“Yeah Mettaton, indeed,” Sans smiled, “Well, if Frisk is already as good as you say, do you think you could take a break from pasta recipes on your cooking show for a few weeks? It's become a bit of a sore subject.”  
“I suppose the people of the Underground and the Surface could make do without my pastamancing guidance. However, may I ask why?”  
“Let's just say Papyrus has got a serious bone to pick with Grillby. He just couldn't take the heat involved with his old job, I suppose.”  
“ALRIGHT SANS, TOO SOON!” Papyrus scolded. 

The party room was only slightly larger than a high school gymnasium, but it looked and smelled much more luxurious. DJ Napstablook was keeping the beats going from behind his expensive looking turntables with towering amps on each side. A laser light rig was shining green, red, and violet beams through the dark space above the crowd from atop each speaker. Spotlights illuminated areas of the crowd where they could bring focus to some of the most avid party goers. Above DJ Napsta's stage was a jumbotron, which got Frisk rather disconcerted. He knew there was the chance he'd show up on it in some incriminating way, but there was just something else about it...

Frisk walked over to the snack table, where there were finger foods, ice sculptures, and fountains abound. He noticed a sea of purple liquid, sloshing within a large punch bowl which served as the centerpiece of a spider doughnut and cheesy croissant arrangement. Dare he ladle himself a cup?  
As Frisk contemplated his second use of the venomous depressant, the Napsta started playing a familiar song he heard the day he fell in love. He took his mind off the bowl for a moment, letting the music guide his locomotion. He stepped from side to side, swinging his two glowsticks to the beat, when to his chagrin, Muffet showed up from the crowd. For the occasion, she wore her halfway-modest housemaid party attire.

“Well, that's one way to dance to my mix, dearie, Ahuhuhu~” Muffet giggled.  
Frisk put his glowsticks back into his pocket with the others. The song continued to play while Frisk was being forced to act natural.  
“It is my understanding that your party did not have a great start on the mountaintop, but that's okay,” Muffet smiled, “Would you care for a spot of tea...”  
Muffet leaned in to Frisk's ear-  
“On the house?” Muffet tantalized.  
The overwhelming environment, the overwhelming volume, and the overwhelming adorableness of Muffet and her overwhelming offer had Frisk overwhelmingly... inundated. :^)

The nervous human felt one of her soft hands on his back. With three other arms, she poured Frisk and herself a cup of venom tea, which she set temporarily on the table. She looked the boy once over, like a writer checking over their work.  
“Hold on a moment, are those glowsticks in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? Ahuhuhuhu~~”  
Was that a pickup line? How was he supposed to react? The redness on Frisk's face gave the face of Mars a run for its money.  
“Ahuhu. relax, dearie~” Muffet patronized, “Monsters never take flirting too seriously... haven't you seen Sans and Toriel? Besides, I would not make any assumptions about you...~”  
Frisk finally had a chance to calm down. There was a second of silence between them.  
“I see you haven't changed your wardrobe since the beginning of the day. I take it you're always in the mood for partying then, deary?~” Muffet asked. Frisk nodded excitedly.  
“Hand me one of those glowsticks... I'd like to show you something neat~”

Frisk reached into his pocket and handed Muffet a fresh glowstick. She looked at Frisk as she brought it into her firm grasp with one hand, and used another hand to crack the the whole thing in one swift motion down its length. She brought her hand back to the base of the glowstick, and cracked each individual segment as her fingers slid down once more, slower this time. She did this twice more for good measure before giving Frisk a subtle wink. Blame it on the rave state of mind, but this girl was playing an entirely different game than Frisk anticipated. Homeschooling hasn't taught him nothing about the human body. 

At last, Muffet picked up one of the Red MTT Party Cups™ and looked inside. She dipped the glowstick into it, and let Frisk peer into the liquid.  
“You see?” Muffet said, stirring the cup with the glowing rod, “With the glowstick, you can faintly observe each individual spider soul floating about the drink... They're what makes everyone here such great dancers, among other side effects...”  
Frisk looked inside, entranced by the churning spirits. The more you know.  
“You see, it is a common misconception that I slaughter all of my spider family and bake them into my confections, but in reality, it is simply nature with more optimized utility...” Muffet explained, “Many spiders have very simple souls, which is why they don't mind being recycled for the charity of others at the end of their lifespans... I donate some earnings, the Underground spiders bring out their dead, I make more dosh to continue the cycle... That's our business model!”  
Muffet handed Frisk the cup of tea. She took out the glowstick and looked at Frisk in the eyes once more. She wrapped her pointy tongue around the glowstick and slowly licked it clean before handing it back to Frisk. Unbelievable.  
“It is rather loud over here... Shall we continue our conversation at the resort's Burger Emporium, dearie?” Muffett requested.  
Frisk nodded. Muffet grabbed her own cup and the two searched for the exit. 

Muffet and Frisk sat alone together at one of the circular tables at the center of the diner. Muffet took another sip from her cup of tea. Frisk reciprocated her sip with a sip from his cup. They had this system going for about three cups already.  
“AHUhuhu...~” Muffet giggled spontaneously for the second time in a row, “Hey F-Frisk, dearie... c-can I ask you a question?”  
Drunk people always follow up with interesting prospects after those questions. Frisk nodded.  
“Alright, okay~” Muffet continued, “Since you're older, and you probably have to start making m-money soon, and... I was wondering if you would like to be my baking apprentice? Or at least clean up around the bake shop sometimes... You see, I've been considering up-sizing my b-business for quite a while, like Mettaton is doing, and I think you'd make a perfect first step. What do you say?~”  
Frisk considered her question as carefully as a chemically altered 13 year old would, so it stands to reason that he would immediately nod in agreement.  
“Ahuhuhu~” Muffet clapped her hands, “That's great news, Frisk! W-We can rename the business Frisk! We can make a website... Frisk and Muffet.com... Frisk and Muffet 100 years!~”  
Frisk fantasized how great it would be working for Muffet, the potential that held in their relationship. It made him wonder if she was thinking about that too.

“And there will be no deadly criminals!” Muffet added, “Because nobody is gonna wanna mess with you and me, Frisk! Because you're a human who's so nice to everybody... and I'm a terrifying monster! Do y-you think I'm terrifying Frisk?”  
Frisk felt her tone drop like he felt Napstablook's bass drop from the party room. He responded quickly with a head shake, and the thought that maybe she was insecure about her own monstrous nature.   
“T-that's okay dearie... I mean, I feel like it's impossible for you not be scared by me once in a while, but at least I know it's only when I'm trying to be... I'm not offended. There's some things about monsters that humans simply cannot understand~”  
Muffet took another sip from her cup. Frisk hesitated for a moment, but decided to partake of the venom once more anyway.  
“Y-You know what?” Muffet perked up, determination saturating her tone, “I've noticed, lately that... that you don't ever talk. Even when you told Undyne your story, you didn't need to speak a word! That was weird... What might be the incentive behind your mysterious vow of silence be, dearie?”

Frisk could only give a little shrug. There wasn't really an answer he knew of, honestly. He wasn't mute.  
“Well, I don't have any issue with it... I talk to you about things, Sans talks to me about Toriel... a lot,” Muffet droned with the sound of bones rattling in the distance, “and we all seem to get along just fine.”  
Frisk noted what Muffet was saying. Was that really one of the things Sans has been bonding with Muffet over? Goat mom?  
“Bottom line,” Muffet concluded, “Talking to you is fun most of the time, but it is sometimes like talking to a brick wall...”  
Frisks heart was chipped.  
“Although, you're a very cute, selfless, handsome brick wall... Ahuhuhu~”  
Frisk heart was repaired, and pumping faster than ever before.

“How about this~~” Muffet proposed, leaning in closer to Frisk, “If you've really got nothing to lose say something right now! If you can tell me something, anything in the world, right now, I'll give you a smooch!~”  
Frisk stared into Muffets five eyes. Was this really the opportunity he was looking for? He nervously sat there on his birthday, in his chair, at Mettaton's Surface Resort, in the Monsterville district, on the planet Earth, after the True Pacifist Ending. The room was getting hotter by the second.

“What are you waiting for, Frisk, what is it?” Muffet interrogated, finishing her cup of tea, “There's that weird feeling you've got again, almost every time you see me! I'm a spider, don't think I can't notice that stuff in people when they're in close proximity... What is it? do you like me, or are you always scared of me? I just need you to say something!”

Muffet was about a foot away from Frisk's face.  
The human put his hands on the spider girl, who's eyes were brazen with tears.

“M-Muffet...” Frisk whispered, “I... I think I love you.”

“Y-You...” Muffet's eyes widened. The silence was drawn out for so long. Frisk began to wonder what he'd just done, what it was going to feel like from then on, and more importantly, what was she was going to say back. 'You love me?' 'You talked?' 'You are out of your league?' 'You-'

Muffet closed the gap between their faces, bringing Frisk in for a deep, ruthless kiss. They held each other closer, getting up from their chairs, bringing their bodies as close as they could get in a public place. In the monster sense of the word, they were both adults.  
Sans thought of them as such, as he watched in plain view from the lobby of the resort hotel. 

“Good job, kid,” Sans congratulated with a deeply sincere smile, yet his eyes drooped with melancholy, “Keep being better than me.”

The rest of the party paled in comparison to that moment, not that it wasn't clear that the rest of the monsters tried. The Happy Birthday song was sung, several gifts were opened, and much of the rest is considerably less than warranting of lengthy narrative overview. Just think of the greatest birthday celebration of your life and you're good to go. I'm doing you a favor here; none of us get many of those, so just take a moment to look back on the best ones.

When the party was over and everybody started going back home, whether it was to the village o the Underground, Sans and Papyrus offered Frisk and Muffet a ride back home. Muffet said it was fine, and that she and Frisk would rather walk home together. Papyrus asked why they would want to walk such a long distance to the mountain, and all Sans did was nudge his brother and say:

“Because, Papyrus, it worked.”

The two made it back to Frisk's house safe and sound, thanks to one of Sans's shortcuts. They even managed to beat Toriel home, who was probably giving a hand in the cleanup. Frisk took off his shoes and walked upstairs to his room with Muffet, exhausted from a day that felt like exactly two weeks. Frisk sat on his bed.

“So, are you feeling better already, Frisk? Spider venom has a much shorter spell of potency than ethyl alcohol, or whatever humans make habits of drinking.” Muffet informed.  
Frisk nodded, his mind having cleared. All he knew was that he meant every word he said, all six of them in order. He situated his lower half deeper into his bed sheets.  
“Ahuhu~ Well, that's good news, because I want you to listen closely...~”  
Muffet flicked off his bedroom lights, letting only moonlight into the bedroom through the window. She leaped gracefully through the air, landing dexterously with her legs on the bed. She took one leg and crossed it with the other, lying down, getting herself comfortable.   
Muffet continued, “You see, I am a spider monster, ergo I must have a spider soul, a working component the very liquid we partook in during the lovely soiree we all threw for you.”  
Frisk nodded, unsure where this was going.  
“I suppose I am much better at feigning intoxication that I thought... I was wondering when you were going to realize that it had no effect on me. Then again,” Muffet considered, “you were probably hammered~”  
Muffet zeroed in on Frisk, eyes half lidded.  
“Were~~”

The two kissed once again, but this time with more coordination. When their lips parted, Muffet crawled her way under the covers until she was spooning Frisk while hugging him with all six of her arms. Oh, how far they've gotten in just one night.   
“Don't worry about a thing,” Muffet whispered, “I'll be gone before Toriel sees me here... but hopefully not before you fall asleep~”  
Frisk smiled, enjoying the moment to the maximum, while also looking forward to all subsequent moments he'll be having once he's working at the bakery. Maybe then, moments like these wouldn't come as “surprising” to Toriel.  
“Oh, Frisk...” Muffet sighed, “I'm so glad you're my... ummmm...”  
Frisk laid there awkwardly. Nobody used to know or care about Frisk's “physical” gender until now. Funny how much of his world is changing; a part of growing up he supposes.  
“...Mind if I...” Muffet started, but never finished. 

Frisk shook his head, giving her permission. Muffet guided her hand underneath Frisk's shorts. Frisk tensed slightly; he had emptied his pockets of glowsticks a while ago, but with Muffet around, nobody could feel the difference between the things in his pants.

“Ah, I see...” Muffet whispered, keeping judgments to herself, “Your secret is safe with me... Goodnight, Frisk. I'm so glad you're my boyfriend... Ahuhuhu~”  
At long last, Frisk had somewhat determined what his future held. However, he still had so much determination left to use. With Muffet, Frisk could finally live every day as if it were the end of the world.

Perhaps he is proper in doing so, since it is essential that any good romance have flowers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That does it for the Birthday arc! I wonder how many people are going to skip directly to this chapter, or perhaps quit after this. I understand if you've gotten everything you wanted at this point; I wish I could do more in the chapter, but I did gave myself that pesky T rating. Trust me, it wasn't for no reason.  
> I persevered until this late hour, because I realized that this chapter was aligned perfectly with Valentine's Day. I hope you enjoyed and weren't too bothered by my hopefully-not-OOC first attempt at writing romance. I'm definitely not great at that kinda stuff in real life either (Don'tmakethisadiary), so bear with me. From here on out, shit is going to get destroyed, so stay tuned and leave feedback!


	9. Pleasant Dreams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter, get pumped.

Muffet kinda sorta lied. She was asleep, in bed, next to her new boyfriend, without a worry in the world of who may catch them there together. Frisk's shoulder length hair was a mess and Muffet's pigtails had been undone, the ribbons left for Frisk to discover upon awakening. The two breathed deeply over each others shoulders, silently, nothing covering them besides Frisk's sheets, the mask of darkness, and the subtle illumination of the moon... and their clothes. T rating. 

She was pried awake at a late hour when she heard a door opening from downstairs. She opened her eyes and tore herself away from Frisk's warm, gentle, sleepy grip. The door closed and she heard footsteps going up a flight of stairs. Muffet was panicked, yet careful not to wake her slumbering boyfriend. She was ready to launch herself out the window when she hear a door click... 

Although, it was not the bedroom door. It came from the other half of the duplex.

The arachnid child sat on the window sill, thanking every last one of her lucky stars in the night sky, sighing in relief. She put her feet back on the ground and heard the muffled words of Frisk and Toriel's skeleton neighbor, Sans. Deciding it was about time to go anyway, she whispered “Sweet dreams~” to Frisk, shut the window gently, and crawled out on the side of the house. She made a stop by Sans' bathroom window.

Muffet peered through the window with only her forehead's center-most eye, nature's periscope. She listened closely to the inside, through the wall, to see what had Sans in such a fuss. He was in a blue robe which looked like a nighttime parallel of his hoodie, except it somehow gave an even lazier impression. He was still rocking his bunny slippers, though.

“Alright...” Sans prepped, “You see, you've always tickled my funny bone, and I think... Ugh, no.”  
Muffet smiled. This was something she was definitely not supposed to hear, but probably had to. She drew closer to the window.  
“Toriel, somethings been getting my goat lately, and I think that you and I should have a kid... Dammit that's worse!”  
Muffet was in hysterics, but managed to not make a sound.  
“Come on Sans, you're just being a skeleton of your former self!” Sans shouted, “You can really hit it off as long as it's through a door, it's just when you look at her you just... can't seem to... Why's Frisk gotta make this look easy?!”  
It was becoming a little much for Muffet; she really wished she could help the lonely monster. It was only a day ago that Frisk was asking Sans for advice, but the tables had turned before Sans' very eye sockets.  
“Alright this is it. Determination, Sans... Toriel... Knock-Knock?”  
Muffet overflowed with regret, but also laughter. She climbed down the wall and landed on the soft grass. She ran silently around the well-maintained housing structure. As she took off down the street towards Mt. Ebott, she saw Toriel's empty car in the driveway. Thanks to Sans, she got out right on time. 

She walked at a steady pace toward the mountain's easier entrance, the lower one she walked through nearly every day. It was near the base and did not require a massive, strenuous hike. She looked up and saw a streak in the night sky.  
“Would you look at that... a shooting star~” Muffet said to herself, “One of the best things I've come to know about the night sky on the surface... It's okay though. I have everything I want for now~”  
The shooting star was quite different from others Muffet had seen. It possessed a bright yellow twinkle and navigated the sky much slower. Several seconds went by and the only thing it seemed to do was shine brighter and pick up speed.  
“Really? You have to be kidding me...”  
Muffet's voice dropped substantially. She did not figure much about space, but she knew that it was incredibly rare for a shooting star to actually do damage. The object was on a course for Mt. Ebott, and it wouldn't quit.  
“No... NO NO NO... Don't land on the mountain! My spiders live there!!!” Muffet sprinted towards the mountain in vain, trying to call attention to the inanimate invader lest the natural shield of the atmosphere took a day off. The star drew closer, leaving only a beam of yellow light in its wake.  
“PLEASE! I WISH IT WOULD GO AWAY! NO!” Muffet panicked.

The object hurtled downward at an unimaginable speed and crash landed into the tip of the mountain. There was a powerful explosion that could liquefy bones, and a bright flash illuminating the land and sky for miles around. However, earth and sky no longer had any distinguishable difference, the entire world had simply become a hellscape of rocks, magma, and debris flung violently from the blast point hither and yon. A massive cloud of ash and smoke stemmed upward from where the entire mountain range used to be, leaving only all of the houses in the village untouched. As well as the village's infrastructure, and Frisk and Muffet. The only reason the mountaintops remained perfectly intact was because there was no impact, and there was no explosion.

The shining light entered silently down the top of Mt. Ebott, leaving all inhabitants of the planet to sleep peacefully. 

Muffet stood there, calming down, wondering if she should get her brain examined by Alphys. 

She walked about her business to the base entrance of the mountain, still curious about where that shooting star ended up. She picked up the pace and set course for home.  
Muffet had finally made it to the outside of her Hotland abode. The castle was more breathtaking and cobwebby than it was the year prior, and it was all thanks to her blooming business with humans. She opened her front door, treading on her new spider silk doormat, but something caught her eye just as she peered through door. A beacon lit the walkway of her mansion with yellow light.

“Oh, is this the star I've been so delusional over?” Muffet pondered, scolding herself for being so paranoid, “I haven't seen these things since Frisk broke the barrier to the Surface...”  
Muffet approached the star, feeling slightly warmer as she drew closer. When she finally reached out a hand and made contact with it, a message appeared in her mind...

*The thought of Frisk being with you, working for you, and growing closer to you every day fills you with determination...  
Muffet agreed. For these reasons, she felt she could press forward through any problem she may face during her adjustment to the surface. She was going to learn many more facets of Frisk's personality in the coming days, weeks, months, years, and even perhaps, her lifetime. A girl can dream...  
*You're going to need it.  
“Hold on a moment... Excuse me?” Muffet asked, double-taking the bright object.

The sparkling beacon did not respond, if it even could in the first place. What was that supposed to mean? Did she think that? Muffet tried to pick the damn thing up so she could kick it outside where it belonged, but doing so only resulted in the same message being delivered telepathically to her mind. Frustrated, she decided to leave the beacon alone for the night. She climbed upward through the network of webs, higher and higher through stringy gray and white cables woven into patterns which rendered through the darkness. Finally, she arrived at her own spider nest. It was suspended like a chandelier from the ceiling of the castle among hundreds of lesser spider homes, thousands even. She wrapped herself in the thick cobwebs she used as a blanket, and napped peacefully on her silky hammock...

Muffet awoke the next morning. She jumped made her way down from her nest and onto the web covered floor. In the same area of her house she saw the yellow beacon. She was reminded of the silly, tired mentality of the previous night. It had been a long day then, so Muffet forgave herself, forgave the shooting star, and made her way back to the surface to work.

Muffet arrived at her shop, more relaxed than ever, as if she had not walked three tedious miles to the strip mall. After a long afternoon of baking, making sales to many a customer and passers by, and preparing bulk orders for pickup, it was still a bright and lovely evening. Birds were singing, flowers were blooming...

Muffet was thinking about Frisk, how she wished he would show up at any moment so they could show and tell Sans a thing or two about courtship. She heard a car pull up in the driveway next to Grillby's (speak of the devil). However, she knew it was probably just Grillby, knowing that Papyrus was totally just canned yesterday. Canned like tomato sauce. Suddenly, she remembered that Frisk could probably show up for a job application. She already had some printed ahead of time when she considered up-sizing and hiring more workers over all those weeks. She just had to grab one from the closet.

Muffet reached into her pocket for her keys, only to find out when she arrived at the door that she didn't need them. She turned the knob and opened the door, slightly perturbed by the unlocked closet. She was even more perturbed by what her senses picked up upon opening it. 

The dense, overbearing smell of lukewarm, freshly exposed iron.  
At the middle of the closet room was a pile of bags, the ones she used to carry money in whenever the time came to take donations to her spider family. Some of the bags were stained red.  
Alarmed, she lifted the bags off of whatever they were covering one by one, each layer getting more and more stained with blood. Finally, the grisly sight was revealed to her.  
Lying on her bakeshop's closet floor were the corpses of her pet, face and body crushed inward through a mark that look as though it belonged to a solid cleat, and Alphys, blood soaking her lab coat, glasses cracked, and a capital “B.” carved deeply into her abdomen. 

Muffet heard a sound that in her current state, slammed past her eardrum and electrocuted her heart with a wave of terror. It wasn't anything substantial, just a sound she heard all day whenever a customer wanted her attention.

DING

The petrified spider girl crept slowly back to the front desk, only to be confronted by a human figure standing beside the entrance of her door. She could not pick out details if she tried, the person was in plain sight but she could not remember a single detail on the person as her eyes took them in, not even the color of the clothes they were wearing. The only thing she was able to do was stay aware of the ambiguous human's presence, and not move.

That was when she noticed that the bipedal figure was holding out the shiniest Desert Eagle Muffet had ever seen.

One deafening blast later and Muffet was shot directly in the center-most eye, nature's periscope. 

Muffet woke up in a cold sweat.  
As you probably figured by now.  
She looked frantically around her nest, then around her castle, warding off some non-existent predator. This came to no avail, but at least she noticed the beacon was gone.  
Indeed, a girl can dream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am a firm believer that you can go as far as you want with violence and still be able to get away with a T rating in literature. Adding smut though? Slap an M on that.  
> I hope you enjoyed, I have a bunch planned!


	10. Bonding Experience

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's see if I can't add another cheek to my half assed OC. Let's face it, some of us groan when authors try to add their own characters. It can detract so much from the immersion into the fandom that it might as well be another story. I'm not sure how AoOO feels about it, but I'm attempting to do it decently (otherwise I'm a hypocrite).

It was Friday, the day before Frisk's birthday and almost one week since the interrogation. The real interrogation, during which Harrison was incapable of withholding all he knew about his father's “master plan.” Unfortunately for Undyne and Asgore, it did not add up to a very big lead. Now wanted, he realized his lack of insight on the grand scheme was intentional, and perhaps even his old man was not completely filled in. It was not his father who was doing much of the planning, after all; he was more of an accomplice, a right hand man to an even bigger fish, an ambiguous entity that took great pleasure in plotting the demise of the weak-souled monsters that would soon plague the surface. It took a rather large bruise on Harrison's cheek to get that out of him.

So it was a Friday morning and Harrison sat miserably in the windowless concrete cell in the back corner of Undyne's basement, separated from the rest of the house by a tight grid of stainless steel bars. It used to be that one could simply walk out of a monster jail cell, although it appeared the monsters took human proportions into account when designing their surface prison. Small callouses formed on his hands from shaking the bars, which sometimes earned him a light poke from a spear if too much of a racket was caused. One side of his conscience said that it was cruel and unusual punishment, while the other felt guilty enough to deserve it. No matter what Harrison thought, his body needed out. 

Harrison sat in his cold, aluminum bathtub bucket, his only source of hygiene besides a bar of soap which he took unnecessary care in never letting touch the floor. He checked the small camera outside his cell, taunting his every desperate motion, robbing every waking moment of his privacy. He would flip it the occasional bird, but nothing he did ever broke the fish sheriff's integrity. Speaking of fish sheriff, Undyne was heard making her way down the basement stairs to check up with Harrison, carrying with her a microwaved TV dinner for breakfast.

“Alright, here you go,” Undyne mumbled, sliding Harrison the tray of chicken strips and mac n' cheese.  
“Thanks... hold on, no fish sticks this time? Bummer,” Harrison joked.  
“For the last time, HARRY, that was an accident!” Undyne shouted, annoyed, “Alphys picked up the wrong dinner, it was supposed to be breaded Parmesan sticks! What is it with human bigotry these days?”  
“Not sounding very PC yourself there,” Harrison retorted, “What about Frisk, hasn't he gotten along nicely with you guys?”  
“Alright, enough wisecracking,” Undyne said, “In a couple days I'm not going to be your warden, and you're punishment will lie in human jurisdiction, so I hope someone's getting you a damn good criminal defense attorney.”  
“Am I really that difficult to forgive? After everything I told you?” Harrison asked, playing innocent.  
“Well, attempting to murder two of my friends in cold blood is kind of a personal issue, and I would say I've HANDLED it pretty WELL!” Undyne exclaimed, “It doesn't matter whose idea it was.”  
“Well, if it means anything now, I'm extra sorry,” Harrison apologized, “That's as sincere as I can get without shedding a freaking tear.”  
“That's a good start,” Undyne said, “Now you can publicly apologize in court and see how they feel about it. Don't think monsters won't be represented on the jury.”  
“Frisk would spare me from this abuse, wouldn't he?”  
“Wouldn't THEY...” Undyne corrected, “And since it's Frisk's birthday tomorrow, Alphys and I are going out to get supplies. We don't take his—THEIR nobility for granted. NOW YOU'VE GOT ME DOING IT.”  
“Woah there, check your privilege!” Harrison smiled, at last succeeding in his persistent effort to mess up Undyne's pronouns.  
“Anyway, don't screw around too much while we're away. I want this cell exactly how I'm leaving it, no hunger strikes!”  
“No problem... wait, hold on...” Harrison grabbed two bars firmly in his roughened hands and moved his arms forward and back in a vain attempt to break free. He stepped to his left and tried at the heavy duty padlock securing his cell, to no avail other than increased frustration.  
“NOPE. NOT GOING ANYWHERE!” Harrison finished.  
“My god, this is pathetic. How will you hold up in court? I'm setting up a birthday for a 13 year old of your species who is about a million times for mature than you.” Undyne replied.  
“What's a million times zero?” Harrison snarked. 

Undyne turned angrily toward the staircase and left her impolite prisoner behind without so much as a benefit of the doubt. She grumbled to herself as she made her way up the stairs.  
“Check my privilege... For god's sake I've got a girlfriend and you ask me to check MY privilege?”

Within a couple minutes every member of the household had left, and Harrison was once again left to sulk in his aluminum tub.  
That was, until twenty minutes later. 

Undyne's front door opened once again, waking Harrison up once more from his dry tub nap. He could hear the footsteps from the basement, pacing into each and every vital room, including the garage. The footsteps were cautious, but strong with determination. They reached a familiar location, the basement staircase, alerting the young prisoner of his jerkass warden's return.

“Back already?” Harrison taunted, “Did you finally get-”  
The determined maker of the footsteps turned from the staircase into the basement, coming into clear view from Harrison's cell.  
“-Oh,” Harrison realized, “Hey dad.”

Harrison's father wore a black shirt under a white blazer and tie. A white, wide brimmed fedora rested fittingly over his snappy hairstyle. Orderly gray facial hair hugged his jawline tightly. Two sharp, glistening shoes paced towards the cell, letting anyone who the man approached know he meant serious business, or “business,” depending on one's outlook on the subject. Those black shoes covered black socks, obscured by a pair of white pants. God forbid a stain got on this man's clothes, which inevitably many do. Luckily, cold water gets those kind of stains out easily. Harrison wasn't fazed by his old man, since anyone who works with him understands casual isn't his thing.

“That fedora makes you look like a 40's noir film archetype,” Harrison stated.  
“That goatee makes you look homeless. Didn't I ask you to shave it?” Harrison's father returned.  
“It's good to see you again, Dad.”  
“So how's it been, kiddo? If I'm correct this was your first time getting booked?”  
“Yes, although they don't do a great job at it,” Harrison explained, “They didn't even ask for a last name, can you believe that?”  
“Yeah, that's a monster for you. They can build you a robot and bring back the dead, but for the most part, they stay medieval. That's one of the many reasons humans have an upper hand in this battle.”  
“Yeah, but watch what you say,” Harrison pointed to the right wall just outside his cell, “You're on camera.”  
Harrison's father examined the camera spying downward from the wall.  
“I shut off the cameras when I got in, but hold onto that paranoia,” his father explained, “Where this operation is going, it's going to be advantageous. Let me get you out of that cell.”  
The suited man approached the padlock carefully, and stretched two hands outward.  
“Stand back.”

Inches away from Harrison's father's hands, a transparent orange glow appeared. Rapidly, the strange psi ball increased in luminosity, heating the steel padlock with a temperature only known to sage monster practitioners of pyrokinesis, or the human invention, a welding torch. He released the ball of hellfire and used one of those same hands to grab a shiny tool out of his pocket: some standard issue, albeit incredibly shiny brass knuckles. He fit his fingers through the weapon and brought his armored fist down on the white hot lock. It sent off some sparks and broke the lock with ease.

“Careful sliding that thing open,” the father warned, “I'll tell you how I was able to do that once we get out of dodge.”

Harrison was taken aback by his father's new incredible powers. He knew that his dad and the other guy were trying to get something to work, but that was a little more than just “something.” He pulled open the gate, careful not to touch any searing hot metal, and tasted sweet freedom.  
“Now hurry kiddo! Car's outside and I don't know how long until that monster couple changes their flat! I'll tell you more stuff on the way!

The two gentlemen, father and son, rushed out of the house (taking caution of the broken, melted lock). Harrison wanted to take his sweet time in the sunlight he'd taken for granted, but alas, the used black SUV awaited on the side of the road a short walk from the house. The two of them got in and took off down the road, passing a fish warrior and a lizard scientist with their car jacked upward, the former carrying the blown tire riddled with spikes. Harrison ducked his head.

“Who the hell's that character in the white suit?” Undyne wondered.  
“W-Who do you mean?” Alphys asked.  
“He just drove by... If I see him again I'll let you know...”

“Now, I get that you probably feel like a complete failure for not only blowing it during a simple stickup, but also getting beaten and arrested at the hands of a 13 year old spider girlscout. Rest assured the boss and I have everything going perfectly according to plan,” Harrison's father consoled.  
“It wasn't all my fault,” Harrison explained, “She had these weird bombs and then the kid we were after, Frisk showed up and... and I just didn't have the nerve... I'm sorr-”  
“Nonsense, son, I'm proud! You stared death in the face and came out with no harm other than a few days in some two-bit monster jail cell! Besides, I didn't tell you anything about the plan we couldn't afford to leak anyway. This is the kind of experience you need to get by, kind of like driving a car. So many thing that can kill you at every turn, but the rewards and skills gained are worth the risk.”  
“Yeah, you can say that again,” Harrison laughed, “Maybe one day I'll be insane enough to believe it.”  
“You know, you sound so much like your mother sometimes. God rest her soul in a glass tube at headquarters. So much determination in that woman.”

They sat in silent awkwardness for a moment, somehow worse than an awkward silence. Harrison's suit sporting dad drove on without a word until he decided to make a lighthearted offer.

“You know, while we're still in phase one: threaten business, what do you said we stop by for some Nice Cream?” Harrison's father asked, brandishing his prized, glistening Desert Eagle, “My treat.”  
“If you say so,” Harrison accepted.

“Good, excellent learning opportunity here,” the armed madman in the white suit stopped the car at the Monsterville District's own Nice Cream establishment, “Now all you gotta do is watch and learn, then I'll tell you a little about something the boss and I call 'phase two.'”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> He just wanted to be a good Dad! No Nice Cream bunnies were shot in the writing of this fic.  
> If you didn't think this was great, fear not. Every chapter after this is going to be geared towards Undertale characters and lore. Villains need development too.


	11. Neurosis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll just write a beginning note here for the hell of it. Enjoy the chapter!

Sunday morning, Muffet had taken prerogative to walk the long route to work. On account of her disturbing foresight, or whatever that dream was, she took off to earlier than usual, anxious to see if she had any early bird customers or psychopaths leaving her friends' mutilated... Anyway, the alternative route was just a precaution in case that mediocre criminal from last week was still on the prowl (he couldn't do that to a body could he?). The path did have some aesthetic appeal, though; it was like a long, relaxing nature trail through the woods around the mountain, except there was no trail. It was just nature. Dark, dense nature, more than Muffet ever cared to see. She almost got lost, but the clear sunrise on the horizon showed her the way back to the strip mall after suffering a few minor scrapes and a few insignificant tears in her red outfit. Anything to assuage her paranoia.

When she unlocked her bakery's front door (thank GOD it's locked), the first thing Muffet did in the vacant, delicious smelling domicile before even turning on the electricity was check her closet. Reluctantly, the nervous spider gripped the knob and sniffed the air for any ferrous substances or decay. Once that checked out, noticing no scent, she counted three-Mississippi and flung the door wide open. 

Inside there was a neat, untouched room housing nothing but her artillery, disposable income, and perfectly unsquashed spider-cupcake hybrid pet. Spider's best friend slept quietly on a pile of burlap bags next to the safe.  
“Ahuhuhu~ Oh, for goodness sake... I got you a bed for a reason, you know!~” Muffet scolded, managing a playful tone despite her overwhelming sense of relief. She shut the door quietly, turned on all the lights, put some fresh dough in the stack oven, and got ready for business.  
'It's going to be an okay day,' Muffet thought, reminding herself of the tactical shotgun she kept next to her ammo box on the closet shelf. Hopefully she won't be seeing any unwelcome human thugs today. 

While the first customers walked in, filling her beloved restaurant with the sound of human and monster progressivism, Muffet remembered that a very special human needed a job application. Before entering the storage closet, she decided to mix up fate a little bit by dialing Frisk up first. After taking one last order at her computerized register, she hit call. A few moments went by, and her boyfriend picked up.

“Good morning dearie, Ahuhu~” Muffet spoke.  
“...”  
“Umm... Hello?”  
“...”  
“Oh, indeed, sorry dearie...” Muffet realized, “I'll just compose a text~”

Muffet hung up the phone and sent Frisk the message:  
M* Sorry about that dearie... Ahuhu~  
M* Or, LOL. Whichever humans prefer~   
F* XD  
M* I was calling to ask you if you wish to stop by my shop today...   
M* I have a job application that is not going to fill itself out!~  
F* :)  
M* Can I take that as yes?~  
F* :^)  
M* Splendid! Please visit soon dearie~

Muffet put down the phone, giving herself the same self conscious lecture she had in her mind whenever she sent text messages. Like, now that Frisk was her boyfriend, is “dearie” too impersonal? Are the tilde marks necessary? What does LOL even mean?

After getting over that, Muffet noticed it was the afternoon, and the sun that guided her to work was high in the sky. She saw a familiar sports car pull into the driveway, the uncovered roof exposing the passengers to be Sans, Papyrus, and Frisk. Papyrus turned off the engine and waited while Frisk and Sans walked into the shop.

“Hello gentlemen!~” Muffet greeted, “Sans... Frisk and I have some news for you!~”  
“Is that so?” Sans said, “I wouldn't call spying on Frisk's neighbors news, let alone something to get excited about, but sure.”  
“W-Wait, hold on... Y-you can't prove...” Muffet stammered, taken aback by Sans' strange insight.  
“Relax, Muffin, I ain't even mad,” Sans said, holding a cheerful smile, “And I'm not psychic either. It doesn't take one to know that the adhesive stuff on the side of the duplex couldn't have been left by just any set of limbs.”   
“I... My goodness...” Muffet said, rebuking herself for her negligence, “What did Toriel say when she saw it?”  
“Luckily for you, I had the energy this morning to power wash the stuff off. Regardless, I hope you two didn't have too much fun last night...”  
“Well... Not TOO much, right dearie?” Muffet winked, regaining her composure.   
Frisk nodded, returning a wink to the best of his ability.   
“Can Frisk and I each have a spider doughnut and a cup of spider cider please?” Sans requested.  
“Of course! Nothing wrong with revisiting the roots that grew this business~” Muffet said. 

Muffet held two small cups under the cider fountain with her two middle arms and pulled the tiny lever above each nozzle with her two upper arms. This filled each cup simultaneously with equal volumes of the golden spider juice. She grabbed two doughnuts from the glass display case with her remaining hands and set the orders on the counter, taking the money and coupon Sans left during the process.

“Thank you,” Sans said to Muffet. He handed Frisk a doughnut and cider cup, then looked Muffet dead in the eyes, “Now if you have a moment, I've got some news for you as well. I won't be pulling your hamstrings for this. I had none to be pulled in the first place. Ready?”  
Muffet looked around the shop for anyone who might overhear. Lunch was over, so she told Sans to proceed. Frisk listened as well.  
“Alright, Frisk, Papyrus and I were all riding about our business through Monsterville on the way over, when we saw Undyne's house surrounded by monster police cars.”  
Muffet nodded, unsettled, “Okay... She IS the chief of our police force, you know...”  
“It looked like those cars were there for her,” Sans continued, “They were flashing and blinking. we pulled over to ask doggo, but none of the officers would give us any information other than 'break-in.' We thought to ask Undyne herself, but that was when we saw he walking out her front door. It was hard to tell with the eye patch covering her face, but I think she was crying.”  
“Sans,” Muffet said, “You said no pulling my hamstrings... Undyne doesn't do that, especially not in front of other members of the royal guard...”  
“That's why we're worried. I haven't even seen her do that. I tried thinking of the only thing that might, MIGHT make her shed a tear, and I couldn't come up with much. But-”  
“Alphys,” Muffet whispered. She felt like if she so much as coughed after that utterance, her racing heart would exit her knotted throat.  
“Right, so we're on the same page,” Sans proceeded, “Now this brings me to my next segment. Muffet, when you were heading back home last night, did you see a shooting star fall into Mt. Ebott?”  
“U-umm... umm...” Muffet shook. She noticed Frisk had moved to the other side of the counter and held two of her hands.   
“Muffet, I'm not like this very often. But I'm telling you, I have to know if you touched that gold beacon that fell from the sky.”

Muffet's was second guessing everything since the shooting star. Did she really see it, or was it all part of a dream? Was the dream real? Was she dreaming right now? Was he accusing her of killing Alphys, if that was the case? What did the B. stand for? Does Sans own a Desert Eagle?!

“N-n...No. I mean, I saw the star fall, but I never touched it...”  
Sans squinted his eyes at her briefly, then took a bite of his doughnut. He washed it down his spinal column with cider.   
“...Okay. That's good I guess.” Sans said.  
Frisk gave Muffet a long, warm human hug. The spider girl wrapped her six arms around him as she tried to suppress thoughts pertaining to the impact of her fraudulent info.   
“Alright Muffet, I think we oughtta bounce. Papyrus is waiting in the car and we're trying to find a way to get him his old job back.” Sans explained, “We'll be right next door at Grillby's later on. Let's go, Frisk.”

Frisk gave Muffet a short goodbye kiss on the cheek. He and Sans walked out the door, leaving Muffet in the paranoia-inducing vacancy of her shop. With that lie she just told Sans, she had put yet another skeleton in her closet. For good measure, she walked over to her actual closet and checked to see if any unsightly corpses were hiding in there.

Muffet opened the door to find it exactly as she had left it, save for the location of her napping pet. It had moved from the burlap bags next to the safe, to the ground next to the pet bed she bought for it. This time it slept upon a pile of toppled paperwork. After all that, Muffet had forgotten to give Frisk an application.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next one's gonna be big. This is the point where the plans I started with begin to dry up, so I'll be taking a few shots in the dark in order to fill the gaps. That's what writing is all about. Catch you next chapter!


	12. Sorry Isn't Good Enough

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the wait! I couldn't finish this last weekend so I got it done this weekend. It was getting long, so I decided to separate this whole scene into two parts to preserve the quality. It's about to get real in here.

The clock ran down, the sun had more than set, and Muffet's store was shrouded by the cover of twilight. Cars sped down Curtson Way occasionally, either to take monsters back to their homes after a long weekend or to make a quick run before businesses closed for the night. The street lights outside the strip mall shined onto an empty parking lot. With no more potential threats in sight, Muffet relaxed; she was on the homestretch and was completely confident nothing bad was going to happen for the second week in a row. However, she still had every intention of bringing her pet back home with her this time.

Muffet waited at the counter until the final ten minutes of her bakeshop grind were up. One final customer had walked in a bit ago and had yet to make an order. The spider girl watched the orange monster as he sat down awkwardly, twiddling his fingers. He had been like that for over half an hour already, and Muffet decided it was time to speak up.

“Excuse me, dearie... Are you going to order something? I'm closing in ten minutes,” Muffet reminded.  
The monsters long ears shook a little, then he stared sideways at Muffet.  
“For future reference, you should come in having an idea of what to order... We do have a sign that says 'NO LOITERTING,' Ahuhuhu~” Muffet warned.  
“S...Sorry... You do have such an extensive menu! I would come here more often, but I don't really live nearby...” the nervous creature stammered. He got up from his table at the corner of the shop.  
“That's okay, dearie~” Muffet smiled, “What can I get you?”  
“Umm...” the poor creature sweat bullets. Muffet was normally patient with customers, but under the circumstances it was hard to hide her discontent.   
“I'm not selling you real estate, dearie... If you want a recommendation, I would at least get some spider cider,” Muffet suggested, “I wouldn't suggest the purple tea at this time of night.”  
“Heh heh! I know what you mean!” the monster agreed, “Uuuuuhhh... One cup of spider cider then please!”  
“Coming right up~” Muffet filled a paper cup with some sparkling cider, which many of her customers preferred. Frisk had not developed much of a taste for carbonation yet, however.  
“That will be 75 cents,” Muffet said.  
“Th-Thank you! Umm...” The monster patted his vest and reached around in his pockets, in search of some form of payment, “Uh oh...”  
Muffet stared blankly. Her five eyes were tired and half shut with incredulity. 'Don't tell me...' she thought.  
“So sorry! I think I forgot my wallet by mistake...”  
Muffet rolled her eyes and rested her head with one arm on the counter, “Whatever... It's on the house...”  
“IT'S OKAY!” The customer reassured, “I don't want to take freebies. I know! I will draw you something instead! I think I have a pencil on me somewhere...”  
“That's really okay, I don't need this...” Muffet sighed.  
“Uh oh! I forgot the paper! I-I mean, I didn't bring paper!”  
“Here, use the receipt,” Muffet offered. She tore the thin piece of paper from the register and handed it to the shaky customer.  
“OK... I'm going to use my magic pencil now...” the monster put the receipt flat on the counter. He gripped his pencil, and drew a... a...  
“What is that supposed to be?” Muffet asked.  
“It's...” The monster paused.  
“It's a what?” Muffet interrogated, looking up at the monster from the deranged scribble on the paper.   
“It's... the only chance I have at not getting... KILLED.”  
“H-hold on a minute... why do you think-”

The paper jumped to life. Suddenly, the space on the counter was being invaded by a wad of shambling paper the size of a basketball. The Doodlebog used it arms and legs to jump the unsuspecting Muffet.

“WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?!” Muffet panicked, her voice muffled through the abomination covering her face. She tried tearing the creature apart with her claws, but the mass of paper still left her temporarily blinded in all eyes. She gnawed at the limbs, which the creature was attempting to cram down her windpipe. Muffet stopped yelling profanities and tried to think of a way to destroy the damn thing. There had to be something in the kitchen that could burn it off...

But after Muffet made a step in the direction she thought was towards her kitchen, she immediately hit a dense figure. She felt it grab her left-middle arm, then heard a click as her wrist was exposed to cold chrome. A second click was heard, and the arm lost almost all range of motion.

Muffet finally ripped the Doodlebog enough to see through her right eye. Actually, the right eye above her right eye. In the two seconds of precious sight she saw that her arm was attached to the register post (the thing that displays the price) which was firmly attached to quite a hefty register. She thought whatever this guy was doing, it wasn't going to hold her down, even if it did mean damaging her financial apparatus. That was, until she heard two more clicks behind her back. Then four. Then six. Muffet was completely cuffed, four hands to each other, one to the register, and worst of all, one to the customer. Muffet screamed with anger through the living contents of a paper shredder's wastebasket, which at that point was choking her. 

The monster took out his magic pencil, then gave the Doodlebog a firm jab. The creature disintegrated instantly, leaving Muffet coughing and gasping for breath.   
“AHHHH!” Muffet yelled, “WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?! WHO ARE YOU?!”  
“I'm...” The monster's tone dropped with shame, “I'm so sorry...”  
“Now isn't a great time for you to be apologizing!” Muffet shouted to So Sorry's regretful face, “Uncuff me or I'll break this arm free and beat the LIVING-”

The front door chimed.  
Muffet stopped speaking. She kept her eyes fixed on So Sorry, breathing heavily into his wet, teary face.  
From the darkness outside stepped a human. Judging by Muffet's peripheral vision, it could only be.

His fancy shoes made soft clicking noises as they approached the counter. Between each step was dead silence; it was ominous silence compounded every couple of seconds by another, closer pace forward. Step after step Muffet dreaded. No, prophetic dreams aren't real... That's it, she had to be in another dream!

The man was behind the counter. He looked down at Muffet and So Sorry, the former pinning the latter to the floor. He coughed impatiently. Muffet clamped her five eyes shut. She hadn't dared to turn her head. 

“Look, mister...” So Sorry said, “I restrained her! You don't want to kill me anymore r-right?”  
“I have to give you credit, Mr. Sorry, I didn't expect you to be clever enough to pull this off. One day you'll die knowing that your art made a real difference to somebody!” the human smirked.  
“Good! I was really hoping you wouldn't do something like that...” So Sorry chuckled nervously, still cuffed to Muffet, “So are you two, um... acquaintances?”  
“Well, Mr. Sorry, in some sense you can say we've met.”

The human touched Muffet's wrist, causing her to gasp. The man turned a key on Muffet's cuff, allowing her arm to instantly retract towards her chest. So Sorry got up, letting the human unlock his cuff.

“There you go!” the human said, “Well done. Go on out and live the rest of your short, disgusting monster life as indulgently and impudently as possible!”   
“I... YES!” So sorry said as he took off through the door. 

Muffet was trapped by her lonesome at the hands of who she could only guess was literally the stranger of her nightmares. This wasn't how it played out in the dream at all, yet here she was. Muffet was paralyzed with fear, knowing that at that moment she might have a shiny Desert Eagle pointed directly at her, ready to fire as soon as she opened her eyes or made any sudden movements.

The human, still behind the counter where Muffet sat chained to the register, had reached over the arachnid's head and turned the key once more. Muffet felt the handcuff release, allowing her to bring that one hand slowly to her side. She kept her eyes closed as the man walked back in front of the counter.

“Alright already, you're allowed to get up now,” the man said.  
“I will not,” Muffet whimpered, but then returned stronger, “I WILL NOT.”

There were a few seconds of calm until another round of footsteps were heard.  
“Please, let me take it from here,” a voice by the door said. Muffet had heard this voice before. The perfect, feminine, motherly tone of voice. Hearing Toriel made Muffet instantly feel safety, relief, and immense confusion.  
“My child,” the voice said, “will you please get up? I only wish to speak with you.”  
“Toriel... Why would you do this to me?” Muffet asked.  
“Under the circumstances, I hadn't much choice. Please get up, my child.”  
“I'm...” Muffet's voice cracked, “I'm getting up, Toriel.”

Muffer's knees shook as she climbed to her feet. Her two free hands grasped for support on the counter. Muffet finally opened here eyes, where tears had started to form. After she finally pried them open, what she saw turned her beautiful, lavender skin pale white. 

Nearly as white as the tuxedo of the human before her. Or his pointy, Van Dyke-style beard.   
The figure from her dream, she remembered at last.  
The monster smiled widely, feet from Muffet's face. Not the Underground kind of monster, the other kind. The type that humans can become.

Toriel was nowhere to be seen. The man's shadow engulfed Muffet's petite form as she looked on in horror.  
“There we are,” the dressed stranger said in his masculine voice. It was smooth and relaxed, but dripped with sinister intentions, “I thought I'd never coax you from that ball of cowardice. What ever happened to the brave maniac that almost killed my son?”  
“L-Look, h-HUMAN!” Muffet worked up some nerve, but gulped when vocalizing her assertion, diminishing the illusion, “If this is about your son I apologize both to you and to him... It was not a good representation to monster kind as a whole and I take full responsibility...”  
“I have no doubt about it. But maybe you'd like to apologize to my son in person.”

The man in the white suit and fedora snapped his fingers, generating a sound that was something to the effect of an echoless whip crack. From out of the dark parking lot stepped a clean-shaven young man in a black wool overcoat and porkpie hat. It was the intimidating formality in his demeanor that perturbed Muffet; she had to give Harrison credit for improvement. Muffet remained still and studied the transformed malefactor until fierce anger appeared on her face.

“I can tell you two have met. Sorry about his wardrobe malfunction before, we worked out some kinks together over the weekend.”

Muffet was switching on. The fear in her soul was starting to decay at the sight of the miscreant boy, and was immediately replaced with her psychopathic will to survive. It built slowly, but Muffet knew that she just had to walk in front of the counter, take her two free hands and rip those idiots' balls out through their-

And then the Desert Eagle came out.  
Muffets burning anger was extinguished like a cigarette flicked onto the side of the road. 

“Cool down for just a second, little girl. You're going to hold still while my son finishes binding you up like a fly in a web,” Harrison's dad said. His son grabbed the handcuffs his father removed from Muffet and So Sorry minutes ago, as well as some red polypropylene rope out of his coat. He walked behind Muffet and got practicing.

“Now hold on a minute, you don't know our names by now, do you?” The stranger asked rhetorically.  
Muffet shook her head, wincing as Harrison got to work on the arm with a locked cuff already attached.  
“My name is Bastion,” Bastion introduced, “Think of me as final bastion of mankind's peace and solitude in its native domain. It is not my real name, but isn't like my son told you monsters a lick of truth during that dainty interrogation.”  
Muffet felt the ropes tying around her legs. She would kick her way out of the situation if she wouldn't trip and get recaptured in the process, which was difficult without her arms as counterbalance.   
“My son also lied about his name like I asked him to, right? Holy crap, it was probably something from the Star Wars cast. Let me guess... Mark? No, Billy... I'm putting all my money on Harrison!”  
Harrison let out a loud sigh as he finished tying up Muffet's legs.   
“Oh you kids and your strange fandom obsessions these days!” Bastion grinned, “Don't think that I haven't seen that old attempt at fanfiction you uploaded, young man!”

Muffet was cuffed and tied, regaining her composure as her captor finally holstered his reflective pistol.   
“Dad, can you get the you-know-what already? I know I'm not supposed to criticize your 'methods' but I don't think there's any reason to digress...” Harrison asked.  
“Right, sure thing, 'Harrison,'” Bastion replied with a wink, “You, monster, don't give my son any trouble. There's one last thing we have to do before the three of us hit the road.”  
'So this is a kidnapping too?' Muffet thought as Bastion exited the door. He turned right and ran to a secluded area around the back of the building.

Muffet looked around. One less maniac in the room made her mind clear enough to think of a strategy. They hadn't checked her pockets yet, so if she could find a way to use her hands to dial Undyne, she'd be making progress. She brainstormed how she'd be able to use Alphys's web bombs without full range of arm motion. Running was out of the question, so how far out the door would she even get? How could she let things get this difficult? Muffet tried to remain resolute and recourceful from that point on.

Bastion returned, carrying a a large object within multiple layers of black trash bags. He held the bags in one arm, and a butterfly knife in the other.  
“Are you ready for this Muffet?” Bastion asked, “Because if I still don't believe it, I can't even imagine how freaked out you're gonna be.”  
“What are you going to do, dearie... make this whole situation worse for me?” Muffet sneered, “What could possibly be in that bag that will bring everything to shit even more? I DARE you to open that thing!”  
Harrison brought Muffet around to the front of the counter. He let go of her and walked quickly to the corner of the bakery, leaving the spider girl to be shown the contents of the trash bag. 

As Bastion cut through the layers of trash bag with the butterfly knife, Muffet's mind raced with suspense. Sadness struck her soul when she remembered how it COULD get worse. Was it Alphys's corpse, like in the dream? Was it someone more familiar to her? Was it... not Frisk...

The bag tore open, and Muffet almost looked away. The stench of death seeped into her lungs as she saw that the body before her was-

“M-Me?” Muffet stuttered, trapped in the most surreal event that had ever occurred on the surface.  
“Yup, that's your corpse. Shot you right through that center eye of yours. I suppose you only remember that as a dream, but here it is, ready to take your place in this world.”  
“NO!” Muffet shouted, “What's going on? This isn't possible!” She looked away from her still, lifeless, cadaver and squirmed to the ground, handcuffs clinking. She inched backwards, making her way behind the counter to avoid the grisly sight.

“So that's how she reacts...” Bastion mumbled. He grabbed the trash bag out from underneath the dead Muffet and handed it to Harrison, who received the scraps hesitantly. Bastion rearranged the body so that it was on its back, as if shot on sight. As he worked on the layout of the scene, a thought popped into his head.   
“Son, can I ask you something?” Bastion started.  
“Umm, what?” Harrison responded.  
“Did you make sure to frisk little Miss Muffet over there? As in, searched her person for items, not that little yellow kid?”  
Harrison glared at his father in dreadful realization.  
“S-Sorry...” Harrison peeped.  
Muffet whispered behind the counter.

“Undyne... please send help! Criminals showed up again, and they brought-” Muffet's cell phone call was interrupted by a rough grab and a pull, followed by a sturdy kick in the abdomen. Bastion stomped Muffet's phone into a scrambled pile of electronic components.  
Regardless of the pain, Muffet knew that she did something for herself. She rested her eyes and waited to be carried to whatever hellhole her captors came from, but not without her hope and dignity.

“GODDAMMIT Frisk, we were LATE!” a deep voice boomed as it barged through the front door.  
Muffet wasn't going to fall for it this time.  
“SHIT, MUFFET,” Sans yelled, talking more like his brother than usual, “I ASKED YOU IF YOU TOUCHED THE DAMN STAR!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How's that for a cliffhanger? Please leave feedback in the form of a comment and/or Kudo. Catch you later!


	13. Completely Boned

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apparently So Sorry was a self-insert character bought in by a backer that Toby Fox put in the game under contract. I wasn't aware of Undertale during the Kickstarter when this stuff went down, and I wasn't trying to attack the guy; I was only mimicking how Toby interpreted the character in the game and nothing else. Now let's finally finish this round of torment, shall we? Pacifist route's over everyone, it's Undertale for crying out loud!

Sans' flashing blue eye took in each detail of the crime in progress as he swayed gently from side to side. He spotted the white-suited man behind it all, and mentally prepared for whatever was to come. Meanwhile, Frisk looked inside from behind the front window, searching for Muffet around each corner of the store. Unfortunately, she was still behind the counter, temporarily immobilized by handcuffs, rope, and a kick to the stomach that knocked the wind out of her.   
Luckily for Frisk, Sans had prepared him for the sight of the corpse in the middle of the room. Sans always had a weird way of just waving a hand to all of the most bizarre infringements of reality.

“Frisk, alert Undyne would you?” Sans told Frisk off to the side, “I think we've both got a bone to pick with these guys. And let her know not to worry about Alphys.”  
Frisk ducked out of sight and started typing a text message to the head of the Royal Guard on his phone. Little to the human's knowledge, the entire force was already preparing; Muffet's SOS was more than enough.  
“Hey, son, it looks like the skeleton has finally arrived,” Bastion said, “Hello, Sans. My pseudonym is Bastion.”  
“Yeah, and out there in the car is my brother. And right there where you're standing is Muffet. Now she's sort of a big deal to me and my friends, so here are your options: you leave and never show your faces within a hundred miles of Mt. Ebott again, or you kick back peacefully and wait for the police to arrest and deport you,” Sans asserted, stating his ultimatum.

Bastion stepped away from Muffet and walked slowly in front of the counter, where his son followed. He gave Sans a stern look.  
“Or else what? 'I'm gonna have a bad time?'” Bastion mocked, “The most frustrating part about confronting you so many times was how predictable you got, Sans. I could never really beat you, but you can bet that I know more about you than you probably think.”  
“I don't remember what you're talking about, but I can say the same for you,” Sans said. He waved a skeletal finger and knocked the fedora off of Bastion's head.

Muffet squirmed in her tight chains and rope until she could see through the glass panes of the baked goods display beside the counter. She squinted her eyes at the criminal in the white suit, then blinked to make sure she was registering the sight correctly. Underneath the man's hat, sticking out of dense, well groomed gray hair, was a pair of sleek, white goat horns.

“Interesting... I think it's safe to say that you two resemble SOME kind of bad anime. I guess it is real after all,” Sans smiled.  
“Dad...” Harrison muttered, “w-was that a side effect?”  
Bastion felt at the horns on his exposed head while he shot Sans an agitated gaze.   
“Son, I don't want you to be here when the police arrive. Please wait in the car and drive away if you see them...” Bastion spoke somberly.

At his father's command, Harrison shuffled slowly past the skeleton, who was reluctant to let the delinquent loose. Sans, knowing he had bigger fish to fry, disregarded the minnow and kept his eyes on the carp.

“You know Sans, my dear...” Bastion started in his uncanny vocal impression of Toriel, “I wouldn't feel so confident where you're stand. You don't want to know the story about how I got these horns, do you?”  
Sans nearly shuddered looking at where the sultry tone was coming from.  
“You should work on your Toriel impression, any bonehead knows that she never uses contractions,” Sans replied.

Bastion cracked a sinister smile, revealing a pair of white, pointy fangs as heat began to radiate from his body. His irises blinked into a bright shade of red as he prepped his monster magic. Sans' eye flickered yellow and cyan in response to the rising tension. Meanwhile, Frisk was making his way into the shop through the back door to help Muffet.

“You think you can beat a monster just because you found out how to steal their powers? I'm guessing you infused a different Toriel's soul with yours for her magical traits?” Sans asked.  
“Wow,” Bastion said with feigned incredulity, “Where the hell do you get this stuff?”  
“I dabble. That would also help explain the Muffet corpse, and give me a few details about what happened to Alphys, which reminds me; you're definitely in for a bad ti-”

Sans spawned a flaming bone to launch at the infernal bandit, but dropped it when Papyrus busted in through the front door and interrupted the scene.

“SANS, DID YOU SEE THE OTHER GUY GET AWAY? I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO, HE'S JUST SITTING IN THE CAR!” Papyrus announced.  
Sans turned his head to look at his brother with both fury and concern hiding behind one nervous smile.  
'Jackpot,' Bastion thought, putting on his best poker face.  
“PAPYRUS,” Sans said sternly, “I need you to stay outside with Frisk!”  
“WELL IT LOOKS LIKE FRISK IS INSIDE AS WELL, SO HOW ABOUT THAT SANS?”

Frisk was planned on bringing Muffet safely outside through the back door, and then return to help Sans take out Bastion. However, with blown cover, the boy had to improvise. He ducked behind the counter where Muffet sat, hands and legs tied.  
“Thank you for making it all this way, dearie~” Muffet whispered.  
Frisk smiled and leaned in and kissed her lightly on the lips. 

“SANS LOOK OUT!” Papyrus warned.  
In the millisecond it took for Sans to rotate his head towards Bastion, the monstrous hybrid of a human dashed over to the skeleton and smashed his thick, strong ribs sideways with a flaming fist. A devastating crack was heard, and before Sans knew it, he was injured and being held hostage. 

Bastion adjusted his grip on Sans and took him to a safe, open area of the shop. Sans could not move his hands, and was unable to spawn bones or minions or use his skelekinesis. Even if he could, the Desert Eagle oriented point blank at his soul discouraged him from moving too much. Papyrus's right eye socket shimmered orange in fear for his brother. Frisk helped Muffet to her feet and turned to watch what was going on.

“NO NO SANS!” Papyrus cried, “I DIDN'T MEAN TO DISTRACT YOU I'M SORRY! H-HOW DO YOU LOAD A SAVE AGAIN???”  
“Doesn't quite work like that, skeleton. Papyrus is it? Listen up,” Bastion spoke quickly, aware of his diminishing time, “For your compliance, I offer you your brother's life and the opportunity to aid mankind to an extent that a monster cannot fathom. Easy decision?”

Frisk was torn; he could help Muffet, and perhaps save her life without scuffle. Or, he could spring into action and try to deescalate the deadly situation his two best friends were in. The pacifist in his soul decided to carry Muffet through the back door, ignoring the opened closet with the gun and ammo. Muffet's pet shuffled his way out to join them.

“F-Frisk~” Muffet breathed, “Don't let him get away with this... I love your nature as a p-pacifist, but...”  
Frisk made his way around the strip mall through a night-shrouded alley created by the brick building and the dense wilderness of the mountain range. He moved away from the shady vehicle that the two menaces arrived in. He and Muffet looked into the horizon, towards the end of the road where lights were flashing red and blue. The lights filled Frisk with determination, and Muffet by proxy.   
“Well it's about time,” Muffet finished.

Back in the shop, Bastion had made his offer to Papyrus.   
“You two both could provide the ultimate service to humans ALIVE, but I'm willing to compromise. Your species requires the flattering of humans in order to flourish here on the surface, no?” Bastion said.  
Papyrus stared, petrified by the events he accidentally allowed to unfold.   
“Papyrus, if you don't mind me losing my cool for a moment-” Sans said reluctantly  
“Quiet skeleton!” Bastion exclaimed.  
“They want you alive so they can-”

A loud blast and an explosive flash later and Sans had stopped struggling in Bastion's grip. His broken rib cage still rose and fell, but at a hazardously slow pace. Papyrus was ridden with panic, so much so that his orange pupil went dark.  
“I didn't kill him, I just nicked his soul. I've gotten good at that. Police will be here any moment, and if you haven't decided by the time I hear them coming, I'm sending another bullet into his soul and taking you anyway.”  
“Pap...d...D...” Sans choked.

Mustering all of the determination in his skeletal body, Papyrus said, “SANS... IF YOU CAN HEAR ME, I'M NOT JUST GOING TO BE THE LANKY SKELETON BROTHER YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO DEFEND, NOT THIS TIME. HUMAN... I'M COMING WITH YOU...” 

Bastion set Sans down carefully, then dragged him over to “Muffet's” corpse in front of Papyrus. The gangster reached over to where his hat had landed and placed the fedora back on his head with great euphoria. He pointed his gun at Papyrus, then used it to direct him out the front door. Papyrus pushed the glass entrance open and took the first step toward his doom.   
As Papyrus paced into the parking lot on the unusually chilly summer night, Bastion kept his Desert Eagle pointed at his soul (essentially where the human heart would be). The two were caught completely off guard when they were met with flashing lights approaching imminently down the road.

“THEY MADE IT... SANS, IF YOU CAN HEAR ME, THEY FINALLY MADE IT!” Papyrus shouted with glee as the vehicles rolled into the parking lot, forming a small barrier of cars next to the strip mall.  
“No...” Bastion shook his head and holstered his gun, “No no no no no...”  
“INDEED, HUMAN. PERHAPS YOU DID NOT KNOW THAT ROYAL GUARD VEHICLES DO NOT HAVE SIRENS YET? IF FRISK TAUGHT ME ANYTHING, IT'S THAT GOOD SHALL ALWAYS PREVAIL EVENTUALLY!”   
“LET PAPYRUS GO AND PUT YOUR MEAT HOOKS WHERE I CAN SEE THEM!” Undyne announced from in her sheriff car through a loudspeaker. Papyrus walked a short, but safe distance out of Bastion's way.  
“Nonono...” Bastion said, raising his arms up. There had to be at least 8 cars in that one place. Tricky to tell in the darkness. He formed a fist out of each hand and set his arms into a blazing inferno.  
'Look out guys, he's got illegal firearms!' Sans thought.  
“OPEN FIRE!” Undyne commanded.  
“It sure is huh?” Doggo replied through his CB radio.  
Undyne face palmed.

Bastion threw his arms downward into the earth, sending a massive shock wave of fire at the royal blockade. The roaring gust of flames displaced several cars and melted the pavement and tires together. Car windows cracked from the force of the blast, but didn't shatter. The officers felt the temperature rise in their vehicles as they watched the incendiary sight rush over the windshield. Bastion used the diversion as an opportunity to escape. He left the police trapped in their scalding hot cars, stuck in hot, melted pavement. Lastly, he took out his gun once more and motioned Papyrus to go behind Muffet's shop. The skeleton was beside himself.  
“No no no... is what you are going to say when you find out what's going to happen with you,” Bastion smirked.

Papyrus's spirit had yet to falter. He directed his gaze at the royal guard, which looked like a literal hot mess.  
“I'LL BE FINE EVERYBODY,” Papyrus called to the intimidated police force, “PLEASE TAKE CARE OF SANS FOR ME, HE'S HURT VERY BADLY!”  
To Papyrus's dismay, the black SUV was still present with Harrison inside, equally unaware of the Royal Guard's arrival as Bastion was. He was blindfolded with his own red scarf and put in the trunk, which had reasonable space for a kidnapping. Frisk and Muffet watched the vehicle that carried Papyrus take off down the road and out of Monsterville territory. Muffet walked up to Frisk, her legs just recently untied.  
“We have to see if Sans is alright... then we have to rescue Papyrus...” Muffet said vengefully.

Frisk furrowed his eyebrows and clenched his fists. In his 13 years of life, he had never known how horrible humans could be, especially to the monsters they so feared. He did not know exactly who or what those gangsters were working for, or what the plan was; what Frisk did know was that the thought of anyone harming Muffet, Sans, Papyrus, Alphys, Undyne, Toriel, and Monsterkind at large only made his determination stronger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These were an extreme couple of chapters that I had planned for a while. Don't worry, good times will arrive in one way or another. More to be explained next time. Leave me your kudos and opinions and stuff!


	14. The Boss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got into the descriptive mindset for this chapter, putting character into the setting. Sorry if it drags for a bit. In fact, there's probably nothing important here, you might as well just scroll to the bottom and wait for the next one.

Papyrus tried making himself comfortable in the back of the hot SUV. It was a cramped space and the skeleton couldn't see a thing, not to mention his hands were tied. He was sure he felt the oxygen getting thinner with each breath he took, but he started breathing slightly easier when he realized that the suffocating feeling was all in his skull, and the trunk of an SUV actually shared the same air as the rest of the car. Did skeletons even need to breathe?

The two captors at the front of the vehicle hadn't spoken much, aware that anything they said could be eavesdropped. More and more time went by, and Papyrus felt its passage becoming increasingly abstract. However, there were milestones on the trip that he could use to keep his sense of time intact; usually these were actual stones and small potholes they ran over, since the all roads to Monsterville weren't well maintained, especially not by humans. To add insult to violent, extortionate capture, patterns on the bumpy road led Papyrus to believe that they had, in fact, been going in circles to further conceal the destination. Somewhere along the way, he fell asleep.

Papyrus awoke, encountering the darkness of his blindfold once again. He felt the cool atmosphere of an air conditioned building that smelled of paper and busywork. It felt like he had spent the night tied some kind of office chair. He sat in silence for a moment, giving the rest of his body some time to wake up.

“Dad, he's awake,” Harrison said. Papyrus was promptly untied and pulled back to his feet.  
“Good, I was about to wake him up my way. Let's go,” Bastion said.  
When the dignified monster rose to his natural, proud stance, he was pushed firmly by the guiding hand of one of his human captors. He continued walking as they made their way towards the heart of the building. A smooth elevator ride brought the three deeper into the foundation. At long last, the scarf was removed and Papyrus was allowed to see through his own eyesockets.

It was a dark room with a ceiling at least two stories high, and about as large as the lobby of one of Mettaton's Resorts. Fluorescent lamps hung from the ceiling, but the only lights were beams of early morning sun coming in from wide, opaque windows high above the concrete floor. The decorative brick walls supported some office spaces that were furnished with rolling chairs, ferns, trinkets, and computers. Suspended above the work spaces were a few cameras and nearly a dozen wide-screen televisions.

“WELL THIS IS AN INTERESTING PLACE TO BRING A KIDNAPPED MONSTER. I WASN'T EXPECTING TO HAVE NO COMPLAINTS! NYEH HEH HEH!” Papyrus chortled.  
“Just sit over there,” Bastion demanded. He pointed to secluded space on the right wall of the room, where a couple of two-seated brown sofas were facing each other. Betwixt them was a reflective wooden coffee table. On top of the table Papyrus noticed a deserted coffee mug, a pile of obscure blueprints, and a potted plant. He took a seat on the far couch.

“Now,” Bastion started, seating himself cross logged in the opposite chair, “I'm sure you're curious what the plan is, what you've been chosen to accomplish, what kind of place you're at, the list goes on. But let's make this easier. I'm willing to answer three of your questions.”  
“UMM,” Papyrus said, “WHY ONLY THREE?”  
“It's what I arbitrarily chose. What's your second question?”  
“WAIT, THAT COUNTED? DANGIT!”  
“Indeed that question did count, you're too funny. Last question."  
“CAN I HAVE THREE MORE QUESTIONS?”  
“You know what,” Bastion smirked, “sure, why not. Just as a reward for making my day.”

“OKAY,” Papyrus sighed, “HMM...OH YEAH, WHY ARE YOU DOING ALL OF THIS?! MONSTERS HAVE NEVER HURT ANY HUMANS!”  
“Alright, Papyrus, let me give you some background,” Bastion began, “Outside of your Duplex town, humans far and wide have been caught up in a whole mess of conflict, all around one simple issue. Can you guess?”  
“CRIMINALS LIKE YOU?” The skeleton accused.  
“Nope! These days, it's all about 'what happens to the monsters!' Can you imagine? Changes like the ones your society is asking for don't come easily, not in this world. Humans, the determined, ruthless beings we are, are willing to fight tooth and nail for our side of the argument. Death after death, tragedy after tragedy among ourselves, all because of this fantasy you monsters have of living among us peacefully, like nothing ever happened. Maybe if you learned some history, you'd understand that to a lot of them, you're nothing but a bunch of war criminals. That hasn't changed for centuries. To those people, guys like me are considered vigilantes and heroes. My efforts to intimidate your settlement hadn't been noticed by monsters alone. Doesn't Asgore tell you guys this?”  
“THAT REALLY PUTS THINGS INTO PERSPECTIVE BUT IT DOESN'T MAKE THIS RIGHT!” Papyrus objected.

“Any more questions?” Bastion proposed.  
“WHERE AM I?”  
“Strange, that's usually a kidnapped person's first question. You're at our headquarters. I can't give you coordinates or distance from Ebott, but you aren't too far, and some may know of the... conflict, this village had with a particular monster back in the day. Last question, make it count.”

“ALRIGHT, NOW YOU MAY THINK I'M CRAZY FOR ASKING THIS... BUT WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH ALL THE CORPSES?”  
“What, does the concept of death elude you monsters as well?” Bastion raised an eyebrow.  
“NO, I MEAN, WE USED TO HAVE THESE FUNERALS WITH DUST AFTER A MONSTER'S DEATH, BUT BACK AT THE SHOP I NOTICED...” Papyrus swallowed, “A FRIEND'S MELTY CADAVER. THAT ISN'T RIGHT. WHATEVER YOU ARE GOING TO DO TO ME, IS THERE ANY WAY TO EXPLAIN THIS BEFORE YOU DO IT?”

Bastion sat up, thinking deeply of the best way to answer. Of all the questions, he hadn't expected something like that out of Papyrus. Alphys maybe.  
“I'm impressed,” Bastion said, “You finally asked something considerable. Please, if you will...”  
Bastion reached out in front of him. He grabbed the base of the flower pot on coffee table, and slowly rotated it. Soon, the singular, Golden Flower was facing Papyrus...

...with its face.

“...Could you take this up with my boss?”

*Howdy Papyrus! I'm Flowey! The buck stops here! :D  
“HOLD ON, I KNOW YOU!” Papyrus exclaimed, “I STARTED A FAN CLUB FOR YOU!”  
*I'm aware, gosh you're too kind! Now did I just hear you ask about a little something called “determination?” :O  
“IS THAT WHAT THIS IS ABOUT?”  
*Absolutely! You see, I've been around human beings since the barrier was destroyed, and together we've been going into depth on it. I guess you can call it my forte! ;P  
“SO IS THAT WHATS CHANGING THINGS AROUND HERE?”  
*Let me start from the beginning. We've been toying with DT extraction, management, and even the successful absorption of a monster soul by my friend Bastion over there... After the humans lifted their marshal law protecting your village, we decided to go out and kill some monsters ourselves! 'w'  
“OKAY, I'M STARTING TO BECOME LESS OF A FAN OF THIS!”  
*That was when we discovered someone was Saving off my watch! You understand Saving and Resetting, don't you? :O  
“WELL, SANS TOLD ME WHAT IT MEANT.”  
*Right! I suspected it was either THAT smiley trashbag or Frisk, but it turned out to be the Spider girl Frisk couldn't get off their mind! It must have been them that gave her monster soul the extra push to grant her such power.  
“WOW, IT SURE IS AMAZING WHAT LOVE CAN ACCOMPLISH!”  
*I'll have to agree with you! :P  
*So I took the divergent reality as an opportunity. I asked Bastion to go out and kill Frisk, Sans, Alphys, and Muffet, but that garbage brother of yours fought hard with that human, forcing me to go way over my reset quota. He could only kill Alphys and Muffet, and we came to this discovery. Living on the surface has given magical monster vessels the determination to persist temporarily after death! Frightening revelation if you're a human! >:D  
“AMAZING! BUT, MUFFET WAS ALIVE, I SAW HER.”  
*Dear, dear Papyrus, we DID kill them, but they were loaded into the other timeline. We tried swapping them to give you guys the idea that they were dead, while we took them here to be tested and assimilated with human souls in the meantime! :D

Bastion got out off the sofa and started backing up towards the elevator.  
*Which brings us to your fate... >:B

Flowey made an evil grin and grew his stem out taller. From his stem grew hundreds of threatening blood red thorns.  
“I USED TO THINK YOU WERE AN OKAY GUY, BUT THIS IS YOUR LAST STRIKE, FLOWEY! THE ROYAL GUARD IS GOING TO SHUT THIS DIABOLICAL SCHEME DOWN!” Papyrus scolded.  
*Please, Papyrus, you guys aren't the only ones experiencing a determination spike. 'w'

Out of every direction slithered hundreds of dense, thorny vines, surrounding Papyrus. One of them grasped a familiar yellow lizard in a white lab coat, and another carried a glass tank with a magenta colored human soul inside.  
“ALPHYS!” Papyrus cried.  
*She and I have become best friends! We've been helping each other figure this stuff out! It's the least she could do for me, right Alphys? :D

“G-GAH! Papyrus is that y-you over th-there? We have to g-get out!” Alphys shouted as she struggled in the painful vines.

Flowey grew out his stem until he was met face to face with the skeleton. Vines crept up on Papyrus from behind the couch, slowly wrapping around his limbs. Flowey lowered his voice.  
*For the first time in a while, I found something that entertained me. These humans are the best shot I have at becoming a god once again. I'm not from around here, Pap. I'm not even from this timeline. I didn't need to give exposition to dead meat like you, but like I said once before, you're a fun person to mess around with! ;P

The television screens on the far wall blinked on, each reciprocating Flowey's expressions in real time.

*The two of you are all I need to carry out my real plan. Existence itself has been altered, but I'm not letting that hold me back one bit! ;D  
“WHAT DO YOU M-MEAN BY THAT?” Papyrus shook.  
*Well, let's just say THIS ISN'T A GAME ANYMORE. 'w'

*HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I didn't get anyone too bothered by the whole “corpse” thing, which went for a while without explanation. I want Flowey to be a good villain for you guys, so I hope I can deliver that in the future. Writing about an elaborate, preexisting story line with lore this deep can be an exhausting effort, fic writers need more credit! Betcha can't hit me with a kudo!


	15. Oh Brother, Where Art Thou? (Skeleton of Constant Sorrow)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for waiting, another busy weekend. Here's the next chapter!

Sans' head swam. The once piercing pain in his body had dispersed, creating a dull ache in the bullet wound's periphery as he clang to consciousness. His brother had been kidnapped before his eyes, the royal guard was glued to a pit of molten asphalt, and there was a good chance that things were going to get much worse. Sans had seen Bastion's monster soul absorption in the encounter; it apparently gave the bastard pyrokinesis, Toriel's voice, and some other Boss Monster features. The horns seemed the most bothersome to the villain, being the only phenotype he couldn't hide without a hat. Sans' work was unfinished and his friends and brother needed him, so he struggled with all of his determination not to depart to Grillby's five-star bistro in the sky.  
Time passed unnaturally. Sans' body felt colder than Snowdin as blood dripped from his right shoulder, the exit wound. Sans did not stay conscious long enough to see Frisk and Muffet enter the shop in fear for him, or to hear Frisk speak.

“You're going to be okay Sans!”

White noise flooded the skeleton's mind. Sans realized he had been put on something comfortable as he made his climb back into consciousness. He breathed deeply, letting the clean, conditioned atmosphere come in through his nose hole. The white noise dwindled, allowing him to hear over it and pay attention to the worried voices of others in the room. The fluorescent lamps shined brightly in his eyes as he saw the world for the first time since however long ago. He lifted his neck and watched the faces of Undyne, Frisk, Muffet, and Toriel render.

“SANS!” Toriel cried.  
“Heh-hey, Butterscotch,” Sans replied, “sure am lucky Death can take a knock-knock joke aren't I?”  
Toriel hurried closer to Sans, and before he could even move any of his limbs the skeleton was being embraced in her soft, warm breasts. 'Wow, I didn't know I was still dreaming,' Sans thought.  
“Alright Toriel, I read that milk is good for your skeleton but this is ridiculous,” Sans quipped.  
Toriel laughed through her joyous sobs. She gave her secret admirer some room to breathe.  
“How are you doing Sans?” Undyne asked.  
“I'm f-fine, did you get those dirty brother kidnappers? We need to get Papyrus back!”  
“Unfortunately all of the vehicles are stuck in the parking lot or totaled thanks to that souped up, fedora wearing piece of garbage. But getting Papyrus back is my TOP priority, I'm not done whipping that skeleton into shape yet!” Undyne growled.  
“Where are we?” Sans inquired.  
“This is Hotland, dearie. We are in Alphys's lab, since Monsterville doesn't exactly have a bona fide infirmary,” Muffet explained, “Undyne drove you here in Papyrus's car in pretty bad shape... Luckily my human partner here had more than enough determination to donate!~”  
Frisk rubbed his arm bashfully, then hugged Toriel.  
Toriel elaborated, “Right. It took me some time but I read some of Alphys's volumes on determination and surgery on monsters. I already knew first aid myself, but Sans, this frightened me. You need to stay here while we rescue Papyrus.”  
“How long was I out?” Sans wondered.  
“It's Monday morning,” Muffet answered, “and according to my precise circadian oscillator, it's a quarter to noon!~”  
Muffet turned her head to look at the clock on the wall, then dropped her cheerful expression.  
“Buuut the clock says 11:50...” Muffet sighed.

Toriel spoke up, “Also Sans, I am not sure your were aware... But you needed a hell of a lot of determination to get back to bring you back to health. For everything Alphys knew, or... knows about monsters, your body should be an amalgamate... The magic in your body not only maintained cohesion, but it is also helping your soul heal faster.”  
“I'm guessing our life on the surface had something to do with that. How much more are we talking about, Toriel?”  
“I think over hundred fold of what Alphys thought was possible.”  
“Now how about that? Almost makes me jealous,” Undyne laughed.  
“And that's why we are suddenly leaving bodies behind... Undyne and my spider family took care of them by the way. They had enough determination to be recognizable, but after some time they slowly melted and became dust... It's a shame to see yourself and your friends like that, even if they aren't really us...” Muffet added.

Sans shuffled in the thin blanket on his cot. He sat up and got a better look at everyone in the room.  
“Okay, so what's the plan to get my brother and Alphys back? Those fake name guys do seem to know what they're doing,” Sans asked.  
The expressions of everyone in the room lowered. Frisk stood by Sans, with a look on his face which showed that he still had more than enough determination to spare.  
“Sans, we do not know a lot about our enemy right now. The Royal guard is doing everything it can to prepare us for the rescue. Asgore has been trying to address our dilemma with human legislature, but they seem of no help thus far. All we have is a brief background of human customs and limited knowledge of their modern battle tactics. We still need to find out where Papyrus and Alphys are.”

“We don't even know where they are yet?” Sans' eyes lowered.  
“Frisk has a lead, but he is sort of keeping it their secret...for now.” Muffet said.  
“Good going, kid,” Sans smiled at Frisk, “Looks like your skills as our Ambassador are finally coming in handy!”   
“That is as much of the situation as we know. We will get our friends back; it is only a matter of time. You do not have to worry about a thing, Sans. Right now the best thing for you is rest.” Toriel consoled.  
“Alright, I'll try to bear the suspense.”  
“Good. Is there anything any of us can do for you right now?”  
“Any of you have a joke? Laughter is the best medicine.”  
“Alright. What do you call a skeleton on painkillers?”  
“What?”  
“A numb-skull!”  
“Heh! I guess that's good enough for now. Thank you all so much for saving me back there.”  
“Any time at all, Sans.”

Undyne and Toriel left the room together, wishing the best of luck to Sans on their way out. With the mission they had ahead of them, Sans wished the same to everyone. Muffet and Frisk started to follow their path until the injured skeleton called the two back over for one more word.

“Muffet, remember when I asked you about that star?” Sans questioned.  
“Y-Yes dearie... I'm still quite anxious about all that...” Muffet answered.  
“Let me tell you how that works. It is a very special power that few people possess. One of those people is Frisk, and I think you received the power through them. I payed close attention to you two after that proposal on the night of Frisk's birthday.”  
“You were watching that?” Muffet gave Sans a suspicious look.  
“I knew it had to happen eventually, I wish I could have been there to explain the whole thing to you on the spot, I can't imagine how you reacted when you got the power.”  
“I-It was like the whole world was destroyed before my eyes...”  
“No kidding, it's gotta be hell on a monster's soul. Listen, you now have the power to SAVE. Doing this will create a way point in the timespace continuum for you to refer back to when you RESET, or die, god forbid. When you RESET, you go back to that point and create a branching timeline as well as discontinue your existence in the previous one. Make sense?”  
“So it's a good thing I have this power... right? I can RESET at any moment and we wouldn't have to go through all this shit!”  
“Not so fast. If our enemy is as capable as we saw, their superior determination has already destroyed your save file. Besides, I wouldn't want you to endure that again, the hand you are dealt at that point in time isn't great, take it from me.”

Frisk was listening on, just as surprised as anyone that Muffet had gained his power. And that it was his affection that had bestowed it. The human boy stood in silence, his guilt showing through his expression ever so slightly.  
“Here is the most IMPORTANT thing. I told Frisk to use his power SPARINGLY, IF EVER. It used to be if you reset, that was the end of it. Now, it looks like someone found a way for other timelines to DIRECTLY INFLUENCE ours, hence the bodies and Toriel's powers in that piece of brother-stealing trash. Is that clear? The more timelines you create, the more opportunities you give to them.”  
“So since I know this now... what good does it do?” Muffet asked.  
“You SAVE with absolute certainty, and do your best not to die or load anything. If you add another branch to the continuum, they will know and destroy your save file faster than you can say 'RESET.' The last thing you want is for them to make a save FOR you. Frisk has had a few deadly cycles himself back in the Underground, so I'm told.”  
“This conversation is growing quite verbose... This doesn't sound like you. You used to be so restrained with your earnestness and always able to lighten the mood... Need I ask if things are becoming too much for you?~”  
“Nah. I'll be back to pulling your guys' legs in no time. It may be apparent that I live sort of a double-life. I let some of that stuff slide in and it starts looking like I have all the answers. But if I did, we wouldn't be in this mess.”  
“Thank you so much, Sans. I hope you get well.”  
“Don't mention it, Muffin. I may be back on my feet sooner than you think.”  
“I hope so... Let's go Frisk!~”

“Frisk!” Sans called.   
The human looked back and stood at attention.  
“Wherever you're getting your 'lead,' don't take advice from flowers,” Sans warned, “It didn't work out for Papyrus, remember?”  
Frisk nodded.

As Muffet and Frisk made their way out the door hand-in-hand, Toriel was still on the other side. She met the couple with surprise.  
“OH! There you are my child... I came back to see if you were still here... I'll be with you two in a moment!” Toriel assured.   
Frisk raised an eyebrow, but then gave Toriel a quick hug and went on his way with Muffet. The proud mother peered into the room at the resting skeleton.

“They're a pair now, you know,” Sans informed.  
“I've been suspecting lately...” Toriel said innocently.  
“You heard everything, didn't you?”  
“Anything to protect my children. Please understand.”  
“I do. I was afraid I was going to have to explain this nightmare all over again for you, as a matter of fact.”  
“I have to admit, we are in quite a rabbit hole...”  
“You're telling me, hon.”  
Toriel blushed.  
“I feel the need to mention, Sans, that you are far more motivated as of late. Is everything alright?”  
“Well, lets just say this isn't a game anymore.”  
“When we set off to rescue your brother... would you stay here and and rest yourself back to health like I asked you to?”  
“Of course not, Toriel.”  
“I see... Then there is not much I can do to prevent that then. Farewell, Sans. I love you.”  
Sans was taken aback. If he weren't injured, his bones would've been rattling to the floor.  
“I-I love you too, Toriel,” Sans stammered.

Toriel slowly shut the door behind her, leaving Sans to himself at last. He rested back down onto his comfy blue pillow, put his hands behind his head, and smiled widely with determination.  
“Getting shot... Always works with the ladies.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still not sure how long this fic is going to be, but I feel like we're on the homestretch. Worry not, because I've still got some ideas to build on. I only advise that you not expect me to have a pattern with my publications, I just write when I'm able and post when I'm done. Thank you for being a great, supportive audience, and I'll see you next chapter!


	16. Wake Up and Smell the Flowers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's gonna be short. Won't be a huge wait on the next one, though.

Toriel and Frisk returned to their house, but soon made their way back to Hotland to keep a more permanent eye on Sans, who was making a quick and stable recovery. The skeleton slept on the hospital bed, providing him with temporary relief from his broken reality. Frisk, tired of the hospital-lab environment, asked Toriel to allow him outside explore the Underground that night. The human had never actually had a real look at how the Underground held up after the strife with the humans, but he had to take a rain check for that. There was a time and place he needed to be. He paid the ferryman and entered The Ruins.

After a short walk, Frisk made it to the bottom of the mountain's entrance. The hole above subtly illuminated the circle of golden flowers, next to where he had expected to see a putrefied pile of spaghetti. Fortunately, somebody was still maintaining that place. Frisk exited the shadows and walked into the moonlit flower patch.  
There, the boy met with a familiar, welcoming face. Flowey greeted Frisk.

*Howdy! It's me, your best friend! I just KNEW you'd come back here! :D  
Frisk sat down, the smiled slightly at the soulless creature.  
*You are still skeptical of me, I can tell. You think I'm back to being a soulless monster, don't you? :O  
Frisk held his hand flat and teetered it from side to side.  
*All that stuff that happened a year ago didn't make me “good,” or any sappy nonsense like that. But as I said before, I'm not out to get you. I'm done playing that game. :)  
Frisk crossed his arms impatiently.  
*Listen. Me, you, and everyone you know in danger. And, to put it bluntly, it's ALL your FAULT. My roots are tied, but I want to give you some information that will help you save this ending. :)  
Frisk leaned in to listen.  
*You see, the village that killed my old self has grown up. There's this building that a bunch of humans modeled after your anime lizard pal's lab, and that's where you'll find her and PAPYRUS. :)  
Frisk smiled, feeling ready to hug Flowey in thanks. Before The human could do so, the flower made a threat by shielding himself in red thorns.  
*WOAH, I'm not done. >:O  
Frisk jumped back, then looked down at Flowey angrily.  
*You don't have any idea what you're up against. If you don't succeed with the one shot I'm giving you, then this WHOLE story will get cut short! Those are the stakes. By now, you've surly taken the hint that this isn't a GAME anymore! Hehehe. 'w'  
*Listen... :D  
*I'm not the only Flowey in this universe. There is a version of me, right now, with more determination in ONE grain of pollen than you have in your ENTIRE BODY. He was created because of your mindless boredom and curiosity, and has completed some research... of an old Royal Scientist. He made it into our timeline, and will soon become UNBEATABLE. You have to KILL him before this story reaches a corner and everything ceases to exist. >:O  
Frisk tried to put it together. He frowned, shook his head, then held up a peace sign.  
*Oh, that's right. You really are STILL an IDIOT. If you had just killed me in that ending instead of peacefully “winning the game,” there wouldn't have been an issue. But NOPE. :(  
Frisk tilted his head downward, tears forming his his squinted eyes.  
*Alright. So you DO understand. Not to worry. Last time, you almost made it! You just missed some EXP here and there and RESET before you could finish the job! :D  
*Our chat is reaching the end of its rope. I think you've still got that LOVE in your soul. THIS time you don't have much choice other than to embrace it. REMEMBER... :D  
Frisk wiped away his tears, then stood up and replenished his soul with determination.   
*It's KILL... :)  
Frisk turned around and marched back into the shadows and exited The Ruins.   
*Or BE KILLED. >:D

Frisk had conquered an unbeatable boss twice, and he could do it again. The next morning, the boy and his friends would storm through enemy lines.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slow day, but something got done. I've got like, 6 wiki tabs open to make sure I'm getting this stuff right, since a conclusion will soon be in the making. Hope you all are ready!


	17. Penultimate Showdown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Told ya.

“The power to take their SOULs. This is the power that the humans feared. This power has no counter. Indeed, a human cannot take a monster’s SOUL. When a monster dies, its SOUL disappears. And an incredible power would be needed to take the SOUL of a living monster.  
There is only one exception. The SOUL of a special species of monster called a “Boss Monster.” A Boss Monster’s SOUL is strong enough to persist after death... If only for a few moments. A human could absorb this SOUL. But this has never happened. And now it never will.”

Frisk, Muffet, Undyne, and Toriel sped on the dusty, dilapidated road at sunrise. Undyne's long, red hair thrashed in the breeze as she drove with a fury greater than road rage, and more deliberate and precise as well. Toriel sat shotgun with a stern look on her face, knowing that she and her friends had some dirty, dangerous work ahead of them. Muffet sat next to Frisk in the back seat, holding each others' hands and giving each other thoughtful glances every so often, pretending that they were on a joyride by the mountains on a clear summer morning and burying the truth of the matter deep down. For the past half hour or so, Sans had been tailgating the shiny red convertible on his tricycle, against orders from Toriel. All four of the passengers pretended not to notice. 

The sun had gotten noticeably higher when they arrived at a medium sized town. It had a suburb and an underwhelming urban sector at its core, where Undyne was still wordlessly driving at full throttle. Humans glanced at the monsters as they passed, some of them recording footage of the suspicious, dangerously fast vehicle as it weaved through traffic. Undyne's inactivity on the Surface and hailing to Human customs had softened her for long enough. She was Undyne the Undying, the most determined monster in the Underground, and no less. She saw the unmistakable phony laboratory down the road next to some regular looking buildings. She found a small parking lot and stopped nearly on a dime, which the passengers had anticipated. Sans was not in sight, but his tricycle was parked on a bike rack by the sidewalk.

“Frisk, are you POSITIVE this is the place?” Undyne demanded. Frisk nodded. Time was of the essence, and the place was definitely suspicious enough. Someone who could steal Alphys's Lab blueprints was likely to find a way to steal Alphys as well, and logically Papyrus. Nobody had asked Frisk many questions, since he wasn't known to be the type to answer. One by one, everybody stepped inside.  
The four rescuers noticed no activity on the first floor. They had been familiar with the layout of the lab, so it wasn't hard to find an elevator. Frisk, Muffet, Toriel all followed Undyne's lead as she packed them in strategically for what they might find when they emerged. Toriel clenched her flaming fists, Muffet armed herself with a large spider croissant and bared her fangs, and Undyne summoned a glowing, electric spear. Frisk had brought nothing but his determination. 

“Storm out quickly, then 'apprehend' any immediate dangers. Muffet, Frisk, retreat if things get to hot to handle. GOT IT?” Undyne lectured.  
The two children straightened their posture. They descended into the basement.  
When the door opened, everybody stepped out quickly to face potential encounters, which there were none. Just dark, empty rooms and hallways. They were reminiscent of the True Lab, only much newer and cleaner. Without delay, Undyne led her friends down hallways of unforeseeable doom. They ran with light feet and low light, so as not to alert the inhabitants of the catacombs. Finally, everyone was caught off guard by a peculiar white noise.  
“Does anyone else hear that?” Undyne whispered.  
“It sounds like... television static,” Toriel suggested.  
“It's coming from this way~” Muffet alerted, taking off down another dark corner.

At last, the four saw a faint, artificial glow coming from another room, a dead end to be specific. When they peeked towards the source of the glow, it was a large TV screen placed in between two bookshelves. In front of the TV was a human figure sitting cross legged with his hands covering his face, back to the entrance of the room. It was a human, except for one minor discrepancy: he had two large, curling boss monster horns fixed prominently upon his head. The group tiptoed in the direction of the silhouetted figure. Undyne readied her spear, ran forward, and set the man's soul into green mode as she threw it with all of her might. 

A small shield of energy deflected the electrified javelin, apparently as if he already knew they were there.  
“There are cameras everywhere. I watched you all come in,” Bastion said, eliminating the element of surprise.  
Undyne did not stop. She kept throwing spear after spear at the villain with unwavering strength. Bastion used his shield to effortlessly deflect them until Undyne realized that she needed a different approach.  
“It's already too late for you. Too late for all of us,” Bastion said.  
Undyne thrust a spear directly to impale Bastion's head. He ducked.  
“SHUT UP AND LET ME KILL YOU!” Undyne screamed, going for the abdomen.  
Bastion jumped to his feet and leaped out of the way of her spear. He ran towards the right wall, where Undyne was producing a shower of spears in his general direction.  
“You're mad at ME, but fighting me won't fix your problem! I'm not the problem!” Bastion said.  
“Why NOT? You've caused monsters a WORLD of problems! Banishing us into that damn mountain, sealing us away, and a millennium later, terrorizing our settlement and kidnapping our loved ones? Now you're trying to tell me that YOU'RE not the PROBLEM?!” Undyne shrieked as she threw spears at the wall, leaving it all but destroyed. Toriel stayed a safe distance in the hallway, keeping Frisk and Muffet behind her.  
“LISTEN!!!” Bastion shouted monstrously, sending a glowing wave of heat across the room. Undyne flinched, then gave the human/monster hybrid a furious gaze, gripping her spear and breathing heavily.  
“Where's your SON, huh?” Undyne asked, “Maybe he'll be more cooperative with my SPEA--”  
“He's dead,” Bastion muttered, “H...'Harrison' is dead.”  
“W-what happened to him?” Undyne asked, more curious than heartbroken.  
“The flower guy—my boss—betrayed me. He's using his soul now.”  
“Using it for what?”

“You see, humans have determination, monsters have... something else. Something that if absorbed, turns men into beasts like me. First, Flowey wanted to use my beloved's soul to absorb Papyrus's and divide its power among an army of humans, to grant them each his dormant skeletal abilities. When my son and I objected, he killed the boy right in front of me. Strangled the life out of him while cutting his throat with those vile thorns of his. He's going to use his soul for the same project.”  
“Do you...” Undyne thought about the gravity of the situation he described, and hoped it wasn't possible, “Do you really thing you can get sympathy from us?”  
“I didn't expect that at all.” Bastion said bluntly.  
“You aren't going to leave this room alive!” Undyne assured.  
“Good. If it's a fight you want then it's a fight you'll get. You all have come a long way, the least I can do is give you guys one final battle with 'the bad guy.' See how much good it does.”  
Undyne equipped her spear and approached the human, or WHATEVER he was. The human began reciting something.  
“Because they are made of magic, monsters’ bodies are attuned to their SOUL,” Bastion started. Undyne hurried towards him spear in grip.  
“If a monster doesn’t want to fight, its defenses will weaken.”  
“SHUT UP,” Undyne bellowed in frustration, taking several stabs at Bastion. She managed to catch a piece of his shoulder close to his neck, but no severe bleeding ensued. Bastion recuperated.  
“And the crueler the intentions of our enemies, the more their attacks will hurt us...”  
Undyne took one last running start at Bastion.  
“Therefore, if a being with a powerful SOUL struck with the desire to kill...”  
“U-Undyne WAIT!” Muffet shouted.

Undyne took a leap into the air and brought the spear down. Bastion took one small, mocking step forward, and thrust a fist into Undyne's abdomen, sending her backwards into the hall. Just ONE punch was all it took for him to bring the warrior's HP down to a fraction of a point.  
“Then anime will prove to be real.”

Toriel, Frisk and Muffet ran to Undyne's fallen, critically damaged form. Toriel stepped into the TV-lit room, bringing herself to the attention of the abominable human. She bared her fangs at him/it, and put up two shaking fistfuls of flame magic.  
“Oh, bless your SOULs,” Bastion commented as he readied an infernal shower above him. Balls of fire danced and squirreled above his head.

“Toriel, step back for a moment, please,” mumbled a deep, nonchalant voice.  
A second figure stepped out of the shadows. One with a unique icy blue eye.  
“Sans? W...Where were you?” Toriel wondered.  
“I waited to see if Undyne could finish the job. I have faith in her, but this guy IS technically a human. I'd give you a shot as well but, I just... couldn't watch that happen. At least not without my help,” Sans said.  
“Sans, we meet again,” Bastion growled, “And now that I have no incentive to keep you alive...”  
Bastion drew his Desert Eagle. It paled in comparison to his monster magic, but he though there was some profound point to be made in using it to finish the skeleton off.  
“Don't even think about controlling my arm and making me shoot myself or anything dumb like that. I can still fire lead into your nose hole from here faster than you can-”  
Before Bastion got out another word, a bone showed up out of nowhere and knocked the gun out of his hand, breaking it and his trigger finger as well. He cringed in pain, just before two more bones smashed into his head and crotch at high speed, nearly knocking the guy to the floor.

“Y'know, I'm going to give you the most over-the-top ridiculous death I can think of. It's just my style,” Sans jeered.  
Bastion set off a long, load roar. Each fireball above his head was flung outward into the ceiling and every wall other than the entrance, destroying them and revealing a gaping black void. Countless orbs of fire danced in the dark. He levitated above the fuzzy TV, then continued upward. Muffet stood behind Toriel, looking more conflicted than worried. Frisk noticed.  
“Sans!” the spider girl called.  
“Muffet WHAT?” Sans replied impatiently.  
“F...Four o' clock!~”  
“Muffet, I don't care what time it is!”  
Undyne lifted her head to speak.  
“S-she means your... clock position dumbass! Fireball coming at four o' clock!” Undyne cried.  
Sans dodged right and narrowly avoided a deadly impact with a ball of fire, which left behind a smoldering circle of ash.  
“Now Sans... 6, 11, 4, 2, 8, 8,” Muffet continued.  
Sans dodged blast after blast, Muffet making the job a hundred times easier as he shot bone after bone in Bastion's direction. From the dark depths of the void surrounding them, Sans summoned a gang of frightening skull servants, his “Gaster Blasters.”  
“Muffet you did not...” Sans sighed.

Muffet kept rattling off series after series of numbers representing which direction a fireball was about to hit. Sans could focus on damaging Bastion, making slow but steady progress with each turn he got. Toriel, Frisk, and Undyne stood back in amazement of the peculiar teamwork strategy.  
“Muffet, how many times did you RESET?” Sans asked.  
“I watched everyone... including myself die hundreds of times...” Muffet confessed, “It felt like it could've been thousands... Sorry dearie... 7 10 1 1! I SAVED after Undyne got hurt, but we all kept dying. I know you'll get over it too.”  
“Wow, Muffet. I'm sorry you had to see stuff like that. Frisk?”  
Frisk showed Muffet his hand, held into a sign that expressed a “zero.”  
“Frisk says he doesn't have any saves yet!” Muffet answered on the boy's behalf, “Up next: there's a huge wave approaching... Stay by the front wall and you will be able to figure it out!”  
Sans saw a bright ocean of orange fire heading his way. He took Muffet's advice, then scrambled expertly to dodge each one. Toriel, Muffet, and Frisk retreated further into the hallway.  
Explosions persisted for about 10 seconds before the wave was finally over. Muffet ran out of the hallway by herself and delivered her final message to Sans.

“BLUE MODE HIM!~”

Sans' eye flashed between blue and cyan. Bastion, without a fireball left in sight, was subject to the pull of gravity. After a fall of 50 something feet, he crashed in front of the TV, colliding with the ground, breaking his limbs. He lifted himself to his knees and kept his head down in silence.  
Muffet handed a large croissant over to Frisk.  
“Toriel...?” Muffet started.  
“Yes my child?”  
Muffet whispered something into the goat mother's ear. She smiled.  
“Okay,” Toriel agreed.  
Muffet walked towards the broken, exhausted human. His determination had clearly left him. Muffet gave him a penalty kick to the jaw.  
“THAT is for my shop!”  
A punch in the eye.  
“THAT is for ALPHYS!”  
The other eye.  
“THAT is for PAPYRUS!”  
A kick to to stomach.  
“THAT is for being a SPIDER HATER!”  
Muffet grabbed onto Bastion's curved, white, blood stained horns, and began to tear them out.  
“And THIS is for trying to kill my BOYFRIEND!”

The horns were ripped out of his skull simultaneously, causing the fallen enemy to clench in searing pain.  
“I'm sorry...” Bastion struggled.  
“It's too late to apologize!” Muffet yelled.  
“No... I mean... I'm sorry, what was that? Trying to kill your... what?”

All five of Muffet's eyes grew wide. Sans' pupil extinguished as his mouth came the closest to a straight face as it ever had. Undyne lifted herself to her feet and looked at Frisk in surprise. Toriel moved her eyes down to meet her child's.  
“I...I mean THEY, I mean...” Muffet stammered.  
“Sure you don't wanna RESET now, 'dearie?'” Bastion breathed.  
Muffet stood in silence before she somberly growled the command, “Throw him...”  
Toriel snapped back to attention.  
“I told you to throw THEM... but now I'm telling you to throw HIM. Let's finish this once and for all,” Muffet said, utterly determinant.  
“Yes, give me one for my son too,” Bastion whimpered.  
Frisk contemplated what he was about to do, and decided that he would hold true to his morals. It is always better to spare his opponents rather than eliminate them from the world against their will. But this was not cold blooded murder.

Frisk was about to carry out his first mercy killing.

Toriel lifted Frisk into her hand, then let him use her palm as a platform for his feet. She threw Frisk as he used his legs to propel himself further. He charged his finishing blow by holding the croissant over his head.  
“Thank you...” Bastion choked.  
Frisk swung the croissant forward, allowing the business end of the crescent to pierce the back of Bastion's skull. Frisk landed safely, using the body as a cushion. Bastion body sunk to the floor, the pastry still intact within his gray matter. After a moment, a soul emerged from the body, like a reward after a boss fight. Instead of a heart, it looked like a silver four-leafed clover, like two hearts fused together end to end.

“Way to go!” Undyne cheered, “Toriel and Frisk, finally putting in work!”  
Frisk stepped away from the soul and walked back into the hallway entrance with Muffet.  
“Frisk... ahuhu...*sniff*... I'm so glad you made it this time~~” Muffet's voice cracked.  
Frisk only gazed at her.  
“I'm sorry I gave everyone that... revelation about you... know that was how you wanted things to stay but it was the heat of the moment and... I promise this won't get out to everyone else! I won't treat you differently at all!~” Muffet pleaded.  
Frisk put his arms around Muffet's waist. She put four arms around him and two more around his neck. Frisk cracked a smile.

“Me neither,” said the human.  
The two brought their faces forward for a soft, extensive kiss.

“But wait, y'know there's still more to do right? Seems saving Papyrus is higher on our list of priorities than, say, a premature, sappy ending,” Sans announced.  
“Of course, Sans,” Toriel acknowledged, “And with the power of this human soul, I think it should be easier than ever to save our friends.”  
“That's right...” Undyne said, making her way towards the glowing gray clover, “Dibs on the unfathomable power!”  
“Dangit! We forgot to do a one liner pun after dunking that bro-napper!” Sans griped.  
Still, everything was going better than planned.

Until the very next moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh Oh.


	18. Ultimatum (Ending 1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the "Mindfuck" ending. Keep in mind that it doesn't reflect my exact feelings as an author. Go to the next chapter for the alt. ending, because it isn't Undertale without one!

The soul hung in the air, basking in the glow of the television screen. When the four monsters and the human approached it, it was lassoed by three dark green vines and pulled down into a fault in the concrete without a trace. The television screen began adjusting itself.

*Hehehehe :)

Everyone looked up at the large TV before them. As a menacing smile rendered on the monitor, bundles of large, spiny stems scurried into view from the darkness of the void behind it. They seems to plug themselves into the back of the monitor and lift it off the floor, causing it to ominously ascend while remaining in plain view of its five unsettled subjects. The scale of the beast assembling overhead was difficult to grasp through the void, but Frisk was all too familiar with what was happening. He walked forward for a bit and paused before the “final boss.”

A pair of red eyes beamed from the white screen and down at the minuscule party of five. Row after row of thorny vines came into sight from each side, each one trapping a lineup of unconscious, living humans, none of whom were recognizable to anyone. Finally, two more vines carried Papyrus and Alphys, dangling them just out of reach.

*Howdy! It's me again! Your best friend FLOWEY the FLOWER! 8D

“GUYS!” Papyrus cheered, “YOU CAME BACK TO RESCUE US! AND YOU FINALLY GOT THAT CRIMINAL SCUM!”  
“W-woah! I'm surprised you all m-managed to get past him in one go!” Alphys congratulated, “I don't m-mean to discourage you... b-but I don't think we're q-quite out of the woods yet... Actually, we might never be...”

*Golly! Looks like somebody heard your calls after all... Hee hee hee. BOY! Thank you all so much for coming! 8)  
“Just give our friends back!” Undyne demanded, “It doesn't look like you need them!”  
*Oh, but I did... They were a great help. With them, I was able to con all of these humans onto my side! It was easy... They detested monsters in the first place. All I needed to do was come up with a fake plan to grant them Papyrus's “powers.” With Bastion as a living demonstration of the power of a monster's soul, these idiots came lining up by the dozens! 8D

Frisk gazed at the face on the screen, realizing what this meant. Flowey jostled the humans in his thorny grip.  
*Oh, you know what this means, don't you, human? Beating me won't be quite as easy as our last game... With the souls unwilling to rebel, I think that you and I can finally amuse each other FOREVER. And what's more? Your FRIENDS will get to share in the experience! I made that promise, didn't I? I will KILL everyone you LOVE! 8D  
Another vine shot out from the darkness and entangled Sans, Toriel, Undyne, and Muffet. They cringed in discomfort, hardly able to breathe or speak.

*But actually, circumstances have changed. After I absorb these SOULs, I will technically become a “god”... but that alone just won't cut it. Ever since I arrived in this timeline, my words didn't feel like my own. Even right now, I'm not feeling quite like my old self. Hee hee! I don't suppose anyone else ever thinks about it, do they? ;P  
“Cut them some slack!” Sans said defensively with a struggled breath, “They tried their best!”

* I realized that I was no longer living in a world of code and predestined lines of dialogue. And when I talked to Papyrus... my suspicions were confirmed. I sounded nothing like myself at ALL! Like someone was speaking vicariously through me. So I went back and read the rest of the narrative... then stared the truth in its stupid ugly face. This was absolutely nothing like the world we're from. The misrepresentation of characters. The irrelevant pandering. Glaring inconsistencies excused with “Determination.” The list goes on! I could do little to predict Frisk's decisions in a universe where I could dig up every answer to every question. Solve anything. Kill everyone. Now, the entire world is an enigma. At this very moment, I can see nothing but a blank page beneath my words. Hacking through white space with black, 12 point font. The final product being however its readers envision it. It may be WORSE than a lifetime of BOREDOM. D:

“Frisk, you're more in control than you realize! You're creating this world! You were the player!” Sans informed, “NOW YOU...”  
Sans was strangled tighter, cutting off his speech. Every trace of physical matter disappeared, leaving Frisk and his friends to hang in a black void with Flowey. The vines squeezed every human to death at once, save for Frisk, producing a rainbow of souls. Muffet tried to RESET, but there are no real save files in a fic.

*This world is no longer “kill or be killed.” That was the old one. Back then, it was secretly all a battle for relevancy. Pure, disgusting favoritism. All of that was decided months ago, and it determined each of our roles as we know them in this “new” reality. But then interest decayed. And now... the author thinks his tale has lost mileage. It could all end at any moment. He may even call this meta interpellation of mine a good enough ending. :D  
*So with the power of these hundreds of souls, I will not become god of the source code. I won't bother killing everyone 1,000,000 of times over. I will be much bigger than that. The old world has done much more than project this one text universe. There are many to explore, and I want to be in charge of a few of my own! To toy with the readers, over and over again. Behind a user name on some website. Nobody will ever be able to tell that it's me! ;P

Flowey absorbed the rainbow of souls easily, each of them spiraling down into his face.

*An alternate version of me has convinced me to put our differences aside Frisk, so here's the DEAL. 'w'  
*I am going to do my own special RESET of the entire world. The readers of this universe shall be SPARED, and I will live on. Anywhere you find anonymity, creativity, and Undertale in the same place online, you can find ME.  
*And in my place... a new ending shall appear. Maybe in a week. Maybe in a month. Maybe whenever YOU, the player... or should I say, AUTHOR, thinks of something. No strings attached! Sound good? :D  
Frisk glanced back at his friends. He nodded.

Suddenly, Frisk was overcome with DETERMINATION. The world began to rebuild around him.

*Ha...haha... WOW. You've really outdone yourself, haven't you FractalMancer? All of these patient readers you've attracted and THIS is your resolution?... IDIOT. You better HOPE those strangers are HALF as understanding as you THINK... :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you at least found this ending interesting or Undertale-y in a meta, Deus-Ex-Machina sort of way. Stay tuned for the last chapter, or click on the second ending.


	19. Pandora's Mountain (Ending 2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to ending 2! The last one was short and full of meta stuff that might be fun (but not so great from a macro-writing perspective). This here is something that's actually consistent with the plot and style of the story. The REAL CANON SHIT. Enjoy.

The SOUL hung in the air, basking in the glow of the television screen. When the four monsters and the human approached it, it was lassoed by three dark green vines and pulled down into a fault in the concrete without a trace. The television screen began adjusting itself.

*Hehehehe :)

Everyone looked up at the large TV before them. As a menacing smile rendered on the monitor, bundles of large, spiny stems scurried into view from the darkness of the void behind it. They seems to plug themselves into the back of the monitor and lift it off the floor, causing it to ominously ascend while remaining in plain view of its five unsettled subjects. The scale of the beast assembling overhead was difficult to grasp through the void, but Frisk was all too familiar with what was happening. He walked forward for a bit and paused before the “final boss.”

A pair of red eyes beamed from the white screen and down at the minuscule party of five. Row after row of thorny vines came into sight from each side, each one trapping a lineup of unconscious, living humans, none of whom were recognizable to anyone. Finally, two more vines carried Papyrus and Alphys, dangling them just out of reach.

*Howdy! It's me again! Your best friend FLOWEY the FLOWER! 8D

“GUYS!” Papyrus cheered, “YOU CAME BACK TO RESCUE US! AND YOU FINALLY GOT THAT CRIMINAL SCUM!”  
“W-woah! I'm surprised you all m-managed to get past him in one go!” Alphys congratulated, “I don't m-mean to discourage you... b-but I don't think we're q-quite out of the woods yet... Actually, we might never be...”

*Golly! Looks like somebody heard your calls after all... Hee hee hee. BOY! Thank you all so much for coming! 8)  
“Just give our friends back!” Undyne demanded, “It doesn't look like you need them!”  
*Oh, but I did... They were a great help. With them, I was able to con all of these humans onto my side! It was easy... They detested monsters in the first place. All I needed to do was come up with a fake plan to grant them Papyrus' “powers.” With Bastion as a living demonstration of the power of a monster's soul, these idiots came lining up by the dozens! 8D

Frisk gazed at the face on the screen, realizing what this meant. Flowey jostled the humans in his thorny grip.

*Oh, you know what this means, don't you, human? Beating me won't be quite as easy as our last game... With the souls unwilling to rebel, I think that you and I can finally amuse each other FOREVER. And what's more? Your FRIENDS will get to share in the experience! I made that promise, didn't I? I will KILL everyone you LOVE! 8D

Flowey let out a shrill, blood curdling laugh. A torrent of writhing vines came after Frisk's team from the darkness.  
“LOOK OUT FOR THOSE VINES!” Papyrus yelled, reminding Flowey to tighten his grip.  
Undyne equipped her spear. A large, green bundle of vines was meandering towards Muffet and Toriel at high speed. She ran up and expertly slashed the green, prickly biomass in every direction. Toriel squared up and threw an intense path of flame at the overgrown vines, causing them to retreat one by one. Undyne moved her head and eyes to detect any more of the giant green tentacles, hoping that real life wasn't like one of THOSE animes. Sans caught sight of another jungle of stems.

“Undyne, Toriel, arreba!” Sans cried.  
A high velocity vine was tearing through the air above Undyne, causing her to reflexively hold out her shimmering harpoon. The sharpness of the blade began slicing the dense plant matter directly down the center as it approached, bifurcating it as the aquatic warrior put great effort into keeping her feet planted and her weapon out in front of her. The two halves went in opposite directions and curled backward as they pushed forward. Toriel released another torrent of fire from her hands, even stronger than the last.

“Sans!” Muffet yelled a whisper to get the skeleton's attention.  
“Yeah?” He replied.  
“We have to do something...”  
“I can't hit a thing out there through those roots. We have to wait for Undyne and Tor to do their things first.”  
“Well we can save Papyrus and Alphys can't we?”  
“That would get that talking forest's attention, wouldn't it?”  
“He's distracted right now, dearie... We have the element of surprise!~”  
Sans sighed, “Well, what do we have to lose?”  
Muffet didn't answer.  
“I'll get my bro, you get Alphys,” Sans affirmed.

Frisk was busy not getting pummeled by vines, without a weapon to defend himself. Muffet glanced at him as he professionally dodged creeper vines that tried to brutalize him each way he faced. She approached Alphys's vine.

“M-Muffet!”Alphys whispered, “Don't get too close, he could... s-strangle me and Papyrus to death at any moment.”  
“He was going to do that anyway... but here I am!~” Muffet responded positively, hopping onto the low-hanging vine, careful not to step on any spines. She looked over to see how much progress Sans made.  
“SANS!” Papyrus shouted, “I WOULD HAVE ESCAPED MYSELF, BUT AS YOU CAN SEE I'VE BEEN A LITTLE... TIED UP?”  
“Shh!” Sans hushed, “That was a PERFECT pun and I'm proud of you, but shh!”  
“OH RIGHT,” Papyrus toned it down to a loud, loud whisper, “ PLEASE HELP ME OUT OF HERE, DEAR BROTHER!”  
Sans looked over to Muffet.  
“I hope spider venom works on plant life too...” Muffet said to herself.  
Alphys was drowning in doubt, and tried to prepare herself for freedom and death simultaneously.  
Sans summoned a sharp rib and hacked away at Papyrus's vine, freeing his brother from it's grip. Meanwhile, Muffet attempted the most venomous bite she could muster and bit into the thick stem that imprisoned Alphys. Just then, to her surprise, every tentacle in the room slowed down and stopped. Toriel and Undyne ceased fire after several moments.  
Muffet tried to pull Alphys free, but the tentacle had instead dropped the Royal Scientist a short distance to the ground.  
'NO,' Sans berated himself with regret for not asking Muffet about HER plan.

Before Muffet could declare a victory, the vine which once held Alphys scooped up the spider girl by the legs and held her upside down, like a fly trapped in a web.  
*Oh, I get it... you guys thought you could reunite your little TEAM. So that you could band together and DESTROY me. 'w'  
Muffet was pulled over to the center of the floor and presented in front of Frisk, Sans, Papyrus, Toriel, Undyne and Alphys. Then, Flowey held Bastion's frankensoul beneath his deranged smile.  
*Even if one little SOUL decides to bail... I'd still have DOZENS left! Every group of humans is guaranteed to have at least a FEW stupid, twisted animals! Frisk down there is in GREAT company! 8D

Undyne charged with her spear to untangle Muffet. She was promptly blocked by one of Flowey's ruthless cactus arms. Without a second thought, she started cutting through it.  
“You're... going to need... to try HARDER... THAN... THAT!” She broke through to the other side, drops of cactus blood speckling her form. She was too late; the vines had lifted her friend far above the ground, a distance Undyne could not risk trying to make. Frisk was holding on to Muffet for dear life when they were taken above the dark void. Flowey healed his cactus arm to give Undyne an example.  
*Hope that felt worth it. Hehehe! ;P

Nobody on the ground had noticed when five thorn-leafed creeper vines crept up on each of them, painfully limiting their movement.  
*Golly, it looks like I have everybody where I want them. Looks like this ending will be worthwhile after all! :D  
A massive, patio-sized venus flytrap loomed from the bottom of the void, wide open for Flowey to drop Frisk and Muffet into.

“Frisk... This can't be it...” a tear formed in one of Muffet's eyes, falling to her forehead. Frisk positioned himself upside down, eye level with Muffet. The human hugged her tighter. She shifted her arms through the vines she was tangled to hug the human back. Sans looked on curiously.  
*This facility looks an awful lot like the True Lab, doesn't it? That's because it is actually connected, just beyond this veil of darkness. After I'm done here, I will ravage my way through the Underground and KILL all of its inhabitants. Then, every monster, human, plant, and animal on the surface will perish. I'll SAVE everything right here. THAT way I'll be able to kill you and watch this whole universe die a million times over... :)

Bastion's SOUL shined beneath Flowey's screen. The vines surrounding the godlike plant monster squeezed every human to death at once, save for Frisk, producing a rainbow of souls. Muffet tried to RESET, but for one reason or another, there was no such luck.  
The vines stopped constricting. Muffet's head swam. The only thing she could feel was the cold breeze against her face as she fell. She tried to ignore Undyne's infuriated sorrow, and Toriel's mournful cries. With Frisk by her side, although dying still SUCKED, she couldn't have anticipated a better way to go.

Sans, finally slipping a hand free, snapped his fingers. 

Muffet felt a slight melancholy in her soul from all of this. It was no coincidence that it was the color blue. The shift in gravity caused her to take a peek at her surroundings.  
She was floating stationary above the flytrap's jaws. Muffet was being pulled up against gravity while Frisk held her down. 

Sans snapped his fingers a second time.  
Muffet was sent upward into the endless ceiling of the void. Frisk noticed what was happening. They fell upward towards Flowey's screen. Frisk rotated so that Muffet's back was to the ceiling, then allowed her to intercept Bastion's soul from beneath. Muffet was transformed into a shining beacon of light.

* Uhh, what's this? Did that grinning dumpster down there shift your gravity? There's no way you think that with one soul you cou-- 0_0

There was a powerful sound, like a gunshot and then a hundred glass panels breaking. Flowey's screen was pummeled in one corner. It was cracked all the way across, slightly distorting the unappealing image. The next thing Frisk knew, he was safe on the ground with Muffet nowhere in sight.

*WHAT DID THAT? If you don't show yourself in ONE SECOND I'll kill your FRIE- 8O  
Flowey's word transitioned into a scream of pain as he felt fangs pierce each vine that held Muffet's friends. Flowey smiled through his rising fear, as he watched the vines slowly rot away due to some mysterious venom. Or, was it weedkiller?  
The group shook themselves from the dead ivy and waited for another miracle. Flowey breathed heavily. 

*There will be plenty more where that came from after I absorb these souls! Or better yet, I'll LOAD you a much better conclusion! 8D  
Silence echoed through the room as Flowey's attempt to load the death scene failed. What kind of DETERMINATION could do that?

*8D

Ever so silently, something came into vision. The glow of Flowey's screen illuminated Muffet from beneath, who now stood on eight legs. Although she may have done something with her hair, most of her didn't look too different, at least not compared to her abdomen.  
She had become an Arachne, the spider-centaur creature of Greco-Roman mythology.

Flowey looked up. He stealthily attempted to strangle her with vines, but her web was stronger. They were immobilized in silky bundles. Muffet hopped down, giving her friends a look at what one “human” SOUL could do if possessed by a spider monster.  
“No time to talk...” Muffet said, “I will send all of you across this void, and then you need to call and evacuate every monster still in the Underground. The fate of Monsterkind depends on it, dearies~”  
Frisk stepped before Muffet, destroyer of worlds.  
“Frisk, please make sure my spider family is safe. Someday you may need to make a good impression with them, ahuhuhu~” Muffet insinuated. Frisk nodded and smiled.  
“Sans, be sure to use your shortcuts. I'll hold off this monstrosity, but maybe not for too long...”  
Muffet turned to wrap her friends in a protective bag of silk for her to launch across the void and into the Underground, which only she could see clearly.  
“Umm... Close your eyes...” the arachne requested.  
Everyone shut their eyes. Frisk put his hands over his.  
“Ahuhu... You don't need to Frisk...~”  
Toriel growled and put a hand over Frisk's face. 

Muffet wrapped everyone up in many layers of silk in only a few seconds. She picked up the soft mound and launched it with all eight of her legs over Giga Flowey and out into the darkness. A net of webs deployed shortly after to kite it safely to the True Lab entrance.

Flowey had broken free from the webs. He ignored Muffet and set off for the Underground, toting the souls with him. Powerful enough, he wanted to destroy the Underground before trying to absorb so many souls at once. Muffet wasn't making that job any easier, swatting away souls before he could absorb them one at a time, binding some up in silk and carrying them on her back like an egg-sac. She strangled his tentacles, created cobwebs all over his screen face so that he couldn't see... At least, Flowey thought, she could watch as everything she loved got destroyed...

Every monster from The Ruins to New Home and beyond had evacuated the Underground and gathered just outside where the Barrier once stood. The crowd moved toward Monsterville, or their New New Home if everything worked out. Flowey could show up at any moment. 

“I CAN'T BELIEVE I WAS ABLE TO GUESS THAT MANY MONSTERS' PHONE NUMBERS IN LESS THAN TEN MINUTES! I MIGHT NEED TO GET A BETTER DATA PLAN!” Papyrus said, astounded.  
“I can't believe I found that shortcut through the story,” Sans said.  
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN, SANS? WE TOTALLY JUST SAVED EVERY MONSTER IN THE UNDERGROUND, YOU AND FRISK WERE BOTH THERE!”  
“You're dang right, bro. Never mind.”

Frisk awaited Muffet by the mountain exit, hoping for the best but expecting the worst, as it were.  
“My child,” Toriel whispered, “Do not worry. I have been acquainting myself with that girl, and she can definitely fend for herself. With a human SOUL, there is not a doubt in my mind...”  
Alphys walked up to Toriel.

“E-excuse me... There is a slight problem with our p-plan so far...” The reptile murmured.  
Toriel stared into the dark entrance to the Underground, inviting any and all creatures or godlike entities out into the world.  
“I think I know what you mean...” Toriel said.

Eventually, Muffet emerged from the cave in all of her arachnid glory, finally seeing the sunlight.  
“We NEED to seal this mountain... He is going to absorb a LOT of souls as soon as he destroys the Underground piece by piece!”  
“W-we know!” Alphys said, “We need at least seven human souls to do that that, a-and I'm not sure that's going to be e-enough to hold him b-back... he has a lot of SOULs.”  
Muffet thought for a moment. She used five of her six arms to retrieve five spider silk bags from her back. 

“Here. I don't know the spell, and we are certainly NOT human wizards... Alphys do you know anything about the Barrier?” Muffet asked.  
“I know how the humans m-made it, but like you said...” Alphys shrugged. Undyne gave her a nudge, “Of course, I'm d-determined enough to try anything at this point!” She gave an awkward yet hopeful smile.  
Muffet handed a bag to Toriel, Alphys, Undyne, and the skeleton brothers. Papyrus peeked into the bag.

“WOAH!” Papyrus exclaimed, startled when the SOUL launched out of the bag and flew towards the sky, far from Mount Ebott, “LOOKS LIKE THAT SOUL REALLY WANTS TO GET AWAY FROM THIS MOUNTAIN!”  
“Ahuhuhu...” Muffet laughed, “They're a bit slippery... Have one more~”  
Papyrus retrieved a new bag and held it carefully.  
Muffet, Frisk, Sans, Papyrus, Toriel, Undyne, and Alphys made seven. The five monsters not endowed with human SOULs began absorbing theirs from the bags. 

“I HAVE NEVER ABSORBED A HUMAN SOUL BEFORE!” Papyrus said.  
“You didn't absorb any of Undyne's training either,” Sans smiled.  
“OKAY THAT WAS JUST MEAN! STOP THROWING SHADE AND LISTEN TO ALPHYS.”  
“Alright guys, it's simple, yet complicated...” Alphys began, “F-first...”

Several minutes later, the quakes got closer. Shrill laughter rang through the mouth of the New Barrier.

“He is here...” Toriel said.  
“I hope it worked,” Muffet responded solemnly.  
A cracked TV screen shone from the dark cavern entrance.

*You made a NEW Barrier? WOW. I MEAN WOW. :D  
Flowey showed off each of his remaining human SOULs in his vines.  
*Gosh, I'd just call all of you IDIOTS, but that wouldn't even cut it. I can't blame you for trying, but all of you seem SO SURE that your plan is going to work. 

Flowey absorbed his souls. One by one they entered the TV. Flowey's screen went from bright to brighter. His appendages slammed against the walls of the exit and shook the entire mountain. Rocks crumbled. Vines grew rapidly throughout the Underground. Giga Flowey, now a bright white silhouette, jettisoned himself face first into New Barrier. 

Muffet stood her ground. She was reminded of the day she saw the yellow beacon fall from the sky. She watched Mount Ebott explode and the entire world deteriorate into nothing within a fraction of an instant. It was not a dream, but a memory. A memory pushed so far down that she couldn't convince herself of its reality. In another world, everyone was dead. With the beast mere feet from the end of the Tunnel, she held out her last hope that this world wouldn't share that fate.

Flowey made contact with the New Barrier.  
Time had paused.  
Flowey's screen was dead motionless. The white screen changed into a deep, calming shade of cobalt with white text.  
“Ladies and gentlemen,” Sans said, “a problem has been... detected.”

A loud rush of power exploded from the New Barrier. A beam of rainbow light was emitted from the mouth of the cave. Dozens, if not hundreds of SOULs retreated into the horizon. Flowey could not express his thoughts through speech, but words flashed by on his screen as he made the brutal discovery that human SOULs still held their sapience. 

*NO NO NO NONONONO WHY ARE YOU ESCAPING?! I PLAYED YOU ALL FOR IDIOTS!!! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO OBEY ME THIS TIME!!! NOOOOOOO... XoX

The letters faded to white. The screen was becoming irreparably cracked against the pressure of the New Barrier. Sparks flew every which way, setting Flowey's plant matter ablaze. One final firework rang from the mountain. By then, everyone had gotten a safe distance from the chaos.

Frisk, who had taken sanctuary with his friends away from the New Barrier, cautiously stepped away from safety to check on the aftermath. The rest followed suit, taking in the grisly vision. The walls of the cave were damaged, Flowey's TV screen was off, the vines were shriveled and charred, and there wasn't a soul left in-

*Tssssssssssssss 0_o  
The screen zapped on, flickering from exhaustion.

*Okay... That was rather unfortunate... Now let's see how many twisted bastards stayed. :D  
He lifted up a handful of SOULs and counted them. One, two, three, four, five...

Muffet, who had bagged Bastion's SOUL in a silk pouch and was no longer a monster of ancient legend, hugged Frisk in concern. Undyne prepared to fight in front of Alphys, who was both worried and curious. Toriel gave her loving attention and comfort to the skeleton brothers, which Sans seemed to appreciate exceptionally.

Six.  
*I'm one short... OR AM I? 8)  
Two SOULs, one magenta and one maroon, made their way through the New Barrier. Flowey absorbed the six he held.  
*OH NO YOU DON'T! >:(

Flowey reached a cactus arm out, but the New Barrier magnetically repelled him. Victory was held in front of him just within his reach, but was tearing itself away just before he could grasp it. The SOULSs, a mother and son, exited the cave.  
*AHA! This whole Barrier must be faulty! It took a monster AND a human SOUL in order pass through the last one... 'w'

Flowey threw a punch with his cactus arm, but his fist bounced off the New Barrier with a flash of light. The two SOULs rested outside, unfazed. Muffet felt a rustle in her silk pouch. Bastion's SOUL had set itself free.

*You, human! I know you can hear me! Help me to break this Barrier and I'll grant you a wish! I can give you a vessel, monster powers, world domination, SAVE powers, AN ENTIRE FUCKING UNIVERSE- :O

Bastion's SOUL shook and split off its monster half, allowing it to fizzle away into nothing. It returned to its natural shape. The charcoal colored remnants of the heart it joined the other two in front of the New Barrier.

*How? I still have more than enough power to break through by myself! What's stopping me? Why did you make such a shitty Barrier? D:  
“I didn't make it like the old one...” Alphys admitted, “It's n-not meant to keep humans out and monsters in... I-It's meant to keep, um... YOU, in...”  
*But, you'd need a...a...

A small lump of dirt shifted outside the barrier. A tiny yellow monocot flower peered out into the world.  
*Howdy! You must be the version of me that's giving my best friend so much hassle! I gave them a tip to help them out with this BARRIER in the spur of the moment. Only room in this narrative for ONE asterisk-based dialogue! ;P

That was it. Flowey gave that Barrier everything he had. He hit it with his cactus fists, his vine appendages, flamethrowers, giant wrecking burrs, machine guns, spores, everything. The mountain shook. Rocks fell. The hole on top of the mountain would be discovered to have collapsed and filled with rocks. Boulders began to pile up outside of the New Barrier. Frisk scooped up the real Flowey after carefully pulling him up with his roots, then retreated away from the mountain with his friends. The landslide began obscuring Giga Flowey's vision. Not a SAVE in the entire universe could help him RESET his fate, since that would allow him to escape this “New Barrier.” He looked above the rising pile of boulders and saw the three souls still waiting outside, on the Surface. Despite everything, the soulless flower could not help but commend that small human for the number he and his friends did on him. Kill or be killed; Flowey was admittedly cruel and backhanded, but not so much a hypocrite at heart. The face on his monitor formed a slight grin.

Before the rocks allowed the pair of red, fearsome eyes to peer beyond them no longer, the family of three ascended into the clear blue sky.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your patience, it helps to give my creativity a time to catch its breath, especially when writing a decent ending, word of the wise. Up Next: the Epilogue, as well as an author's note. Don't get off the ride just yet.


	20. Good Morning! (Epilogue)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, I was busy graduating high school. I will put an author's note at the end of this to give you my thoughts and advice. Thank you all, and enjoy.

“Rise and shine, dearie... breakfast is ready!~” Muffet sang to Frisk from the bottom of the stairs. Frisk lifted his head from his pillow with a slow, labored motion.

Frisk was not sleeping well lately; it had been only a week since he took down an organization hellbent on initiating a SECOND war between monsters and humans before simply destroying the world. The drool on his pillow had seeped into his messy, shoulder length hair. The human started feeling lightheaded after tearing himself from his warm bed and setting his feet on the ground. He stomped a couple times to let Muffet know he was awake. Thank goodness her voice could pry him from the horrors he was reminded of during his less peaceful slumbers.

Frisk walked over to his bedroom mirror and brushed out the part of his shoulder length hair where a subtle amount of drool held some strands together, then he did his best to cure his bedhead. He'd have to shower his hair back into shape before he left for work. It was his first day on the job, after all.

Frisk made his way down the stairs in his pajamas, where Muffet and Toriel were setting up the breakfast table.  
“You know Muffet, I do not know how I got through mornings before you started living with us!” Toriel said with gratitude.  
“It's no trouble...” Muffet said, humbling herself and her mastery of morning routines, “Now, serving thousands of tiny mouths belonging to a newly hatched brood of siblings you didn't even know about until you got home from work, now THAT'S trouble... Ahuhuhu~”

Frisk slowly stepped down more stairs, allowing his blood flow to re-calibrate to the waking world. The boy realized that he really was growing up, for better or for worse. The monsters in the kitchen greeted him with smiles.  
“Bout' time you got down here kiddo, Muffet's already done showin us how she makes a killer breakfast with nothing but eggs, bread, and a heap of snails...” Sans said. He and his brother Papyrus (wearing his “Cool Dude” outfit) were waiting patiently at the kitchen table to see Muffet and Toriel's culinary masterpiece.  
Frisk made it to the bottom of the steps, reinvigorated by the scents. Frisk never found snail consumption so appealing before Muffet began her stay at his duplex. 

“HOLD ON... MUFFET DID YOU REALLY...!” shouted Papyrus gleefully.  
“Yes, dearie, just for you...” Muffet smiled, scooping a saucy bundle of tangled noodles out of a pot and onto a plate, “...some extra special spaghetti with snails instead of meatballs. I can get into more detail about ingredients and preparation, but I wouldn't want to bore you... Ahuhuhu~”  
“OH GOODNESS NO, I AM DETERMINED TO LEARN YOUR WAYS OF PASTAMANCING! PRAY TELL, WHAT DO YOU CALL THIS CULLINARY COUP DE GRACE, THIS DIVINE DISH, THIS SACRED SPECIALTY OF SPAGHETTI?”  
Muffet thought for a moment, “How about... 'Mollusk Heaven...'”  
“WOW, THAT SOUNDS GREAT! GLAD I FINALLY CONVINCED GRILLBY TO GIVE ME MY JOB BACK AFTER BANISHING ALL THAT EVIL! HE'S SURE TO GIVE ME A HANDSOM RAISE AFTER I INTRODUCE THIS TO THE MENU! WHAT DO YOU THINK SANS?”  
“I think that's an excellent idea Papyrus...” Sans said after little thought.  
“WHY I OUGHTT- HOLD ON, REALLY SANS? WOW... W-WHY WOULD YOU HAPPEN TO THINK THAT?” Papyrus inquired.  
“Cuz' it's a good idea to maintain the balance, y'know? If there's a Mollusk Heaven there's sure to be a Mollusk Hell,” Sans grinned.  
“DANGIT SANS I KNEW YOU WERE GOING TO DO THAT!”  
“Umm... Do what?”  
“THAT THING WHERE YOU MAKE ME FEEL PROUD OF MYSELF FOR A MOMENT RIGHT BEFORE YOU SNATCH IT AWAY FROM ME WITH A LAME GAG!”  
“Bro, your hubris is fine... and besides, Toriel seems to be enjoying herself...” Sans looked over to goat mom, who stood idly while keeping back a regrettable laugh.  
“WELL NO KIDDING, SHE'S LIKE, YOUR GIRLFRIEND NOW!” Papyrus rolled his eyes as he drew out the syllables.  
Toriel blushed, but her nervous smile made no objections.  
Frisk was almost done with breakfast.

“Alright skeletons! Cease your petty little domestic, your making Frisk uncomfortable...” Muffet scolded.  
“INDEED!” Papyrus huffed, “YOUR JOKES CAN HURT SOMETIMES SANS... 4 REALZ...”  
“I understand. I-I'll try to be a better brother next time.”  
'Not good...' Sans thought.

Papyrus thought for a moment... “YOU KNOW SANS, WE GET INTO THESE SILLY LITTLE QUARRELS ALL THE TIME, BUT... AFTER BEING FACED WITH CERTAIN DOOM LAST WEEK, I'VE COME TO REALIZE THAT I ENJOYED EVERY LAST ONE, IN AN UNUSUAL WAY... I DON'T WANT TO KEEP YOU FROM BEING YOURSELF!”  
“Really? That's very mature of you Papyrus... I'll still pull your leg from time to time, but I'll try not to pull it OFF from now on,” Sans promised, winking at his brother.  
'That was a close one, maybe he won't disown me after this...' Sans thought, internally relieved.

Frisk gave Papyrus a thoughtful hug. Frisk left for his shower and when he returned, everyone's plates were clean and breakfast dishes were put away.

“NOW,” Papyrus announced, “I THINK IT'S TIME WE DROVE FRISK TO WORK! AND MUFFET TOO... SINCE SHE, YOU KNOW, OWNS THE PLACE FRISK WORKS AT. TORIEL, DO YOU KNOW WHERE MY KEYS ARE?”  
Toriel looked uneasy, “Umm... Actually Papyrus-”  
“OH NEVERMIND, HERE THEY ARE ON THE, UHH, STOVE! IN THIS... FRYING PAN?”  
“Wait, bro I wouldn't-” Sans warned, too late to prevent-

“AAAAUUUUGGGGGHHHH!!!” Papyrus burst in agony, “NOT THE OL' SPICY KEYCHAIN! I GIVE YOU A HEARTFELT TRUCE AND YOU GIVE ME THE SPICY KEYCHAIN! YOUR OWN BROTHER!”

“OH look at the time! You've got your shift at Grillby's in five minutes!” Sans diverted, barely resisting a smirk, “I'll get some oven mitts and drive you all to the plaza.”

“YOU RAT! YOU WEREN'T USING THAT FRYING PAN TO MAKE BREAKFAST! YOU KNOW IF I DIDN'T WEAR THESE GLOVES ALL THE TIME THESE BURNS WOULD BE MUCH WORSE!”

“C'mon bro! It wasn't worse than what Grillby'd do to you if you were late on your first day back!” Sans rationalized. Papyrus grumbled, exiting the car.  
“IF YOU DO IT AGAIN, I AM COMPLETELY GOING BACK ON WHAT I SAID EARLIER!” Papyrus threatened, walking to Grillby's from the parking lot.  
“I wouldn't blame ya. See you after work, Papyrus! You too kids!” Sans waved goodbye and started cruising away. Papyrus smiled and put on his chef's hat, waving farewell to Sans. Not even the ol' spicy keychain could extinguish his good will entirely.

“Okay Frisk...” Muffet said “I've shown you the webs, so are you ready for our first time?”  
Frisk's narrow eyes shot open, double taking Muffet.  
“Working together?”  
Frisk exhaled. Muffett giggled, inviting him into her bakery. Frisk knew he was going to have to get much better at interpreting mixed messages.

Frisk did most of the work opening the bakery; he dusted some interfering cobwebs, checked on the new security system (cameras = human-proof!), fired up the ovens, activated the register, and turned on the fluorescent “OPEN” sign.  
“Very good, dearie... We're officially open for business!” Muffet said triumphantly.  
The spider girl held out six arms and set each of her palms out flat. Frisk engaged in a special high-five, throwing his hands down and letting them hit Muffet's palms pair at a time on the way. Frisk thought of ways to improve it, because having a secret handshake or high-five is an indubitable sign of love and companionship. Maybe mix up the sequence and throw in some vertical fist bumps.

Undyne and Alphys entered the restaurant soon after, securing their places as the first customers Frisk served.  
“FRISK! How's your first day on the job little buddy?” Undyne asked.  
“H-Hey Frisk! It doesn't seem you had any problem opening the place up!” Alphys complemented.  
Frisk smiled widely at the two and dinged the silver bell on the counter top in front of him, excited to take his first orders. Alphys asked for some spider French toast with spider cider as well as a spider fritter, and Undyne requested a mug of the new Black Widow Coffee™, a spider everything bagel, and ordered a spider food cake in a box for later. The two sat down, and after a minute Frisk approached to check on his first customers.

“What's up best pal! I was telling Alphys here that the Royal Guard has been busier lately with all the new monsters coming in. That was expected, with all those monsters out of a home...”  
“Y-Yeah...” Alphys piped in, “But luckily many humans like you are sympathizing with us, so they are letting some monsters l-live with them! Hey, you know, i-it's just like in one of my human mangas!”  
“OKAY Alphys,” Undyne intervened, “Umm... Maybe you should tell Frisk about that one when he's a little bit older.”  
Frisk blinked in confusion. Oh well, he might as well ask Monster Kid about it.  
“Anyway,” Undyne continued, “That means we're getting a brand new headquarters for the Royal Guard! We'll be able to ensure that no serious danger slips under the radar again. All that and we'll finally be able to discuss legislature between our species, with your help of course!”

“Y-you know,” Alphys smiled, “something like that was also in that m-m-”  
“So uhh... I guess we'll be on our way!” Undyne got up from her chair, “If anyone ever sticks you up again you have my number! And you also got Muffet as your boss, so chances are you won't even need me...for that reason anyway.”  
Undyne smiled widely at Frisk as she made her way out the door, holding Alphys' claw.  
“See ya F-Frisk! I can't wait to tell you about that manga, it could t-totally help you out as our Ambassador!” Alphys said as Undyne pulled her through the door.

“Dearie, more customers should be coming in for breakfast at any moment... Could you please help me with these orders?~” Muffet called from the kitchen. Frisk picked up the mugs and plates from his first customers' table and took them to the kitchen before helping Muffet carry the freshly baked and decorated pastries. The door rang as new customers came in from far and wide.

“You did very well today Frisk... I think this is the most human customers we ever had... customers in general, even!” said Muffet, astounded, “It warms my heart that they are finally growing more comfortable around arachnids...”  
Frisk smiled and held out his hands for a celebratory high-five. Muffet paused and looked at him, lidding her eyes.  
“Ahuhu... Come here dearie...~” Muffet said softly, holding Frisk's head.  
Frisk brought his head in and kissed Muffet gently. He learned a lot about how to kiss since his 13th birthday. It helps that Muffet is a natural.  
“That's for your first job-well-done...~” Muffet smiled, “Now let's see how well you remember closing up... In the meantime, I think I'll let Sans know that we're okay with walking...~”

Frisk and Muffet took a safe shortcut and made it back to their home town of Monsterville not too late that evening. They entered through the front door, and Muffet headed towards her new room in the basement.  
“I'll be back up by dinner, dearie... I'm always exhausted after busy days like that. Thank goodness you made it easier though!~~” Muffet said, blowing Frisk a kiss. She walked down the stairs to her room. The basement wasn't too much different from her castle in Hotland, as long as the heater was working.

Frisk had one thing left to take care of that day. He went upstairs to his room to check on an old friend of his.  
The clay pot sat fittingly on the sill of his open bedroom window. 

*Hey, you know you can plant me in your backyard anytime. I promise I won't run amok like the other guy. ;P  
Frisk smiled and teasingly flicked one of Flowey's petals.  
*Hey now, I don't have a soul but I'm still a person! Just give me a bigger pot, how about that? I won't call you an idiot for a month! :D  
Frisk picked up the small watering can on his dresser and sprinkled some plant food-enriched water on Flowey's roots. It's a pain in the ass to get the solution exactly to his liking; he usually needs Muffet to eyeball it.  
*If you get me a garden I'll keep the bugs away! I'll collect the snails too. I can pick out the weeds myself. Anything for my best friend! :)

Having Flowey as a roommate got a little exhausting. He couldn't feel love (not to be confused with LOVE), but he was working on trust, which was a close enough alternative. Or maybe there is hope for SOULless beings to recover. After all, it didn't take too long for monsters to develop some nifty features in their SOULs since they started living on the Surface.

*If you let me live in the garden, I won't have to keep watch here. You and your spider girlfriend can do whatever you want in this room, and Toriel won't have to hear a word... :O

Frisk smiled and rolled his eyes, then squinted at Flowey mischievously.  
“Eh... I'll think about it,” Frisk shrugged.

*We'll see if you do, you IDIOT. >:)

“My child! Tell me about your first day on the job! Hey, is Asriel bothering you again?”  
*Golly, it's good to know Mom and I are finally on a first name basis... 'w'

Frisk ran downstairs to tell Toriel all about his day at work. To return the favor from breakfast, he got to work with Toriel in the kitchen. Muffet would be in for a pleasant surprise when she woke up for dinner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Author's Note
> 
> I'm just going to put my final thoughts on the process of writing this fanfic here, in the form of advice for others who want to write fanfiction. It's all based on my opinions, experiences, and speculations from this story.
> 
> The process of writing my first fanfiction, and furthermore, my first internet publication, was creatively and emotionally dynamic. When the fandom hit me like a brick wall, I was pumped to be one of the first to write a dramatic fic involving a few of my favorite characters . Immediately after I began my mood sank and I kept thinking, “What am I doing? I could be using my creativity to build my own story.” During the first chapter I was really focused on impressions and I knew I was making myself vulnerable online, but I had faith in myself. These negative feelings rapidly fled when I noticed all of the vocal support. At last I could relax. Although I did hold the desire to generate ideas for my own stories, I was compelled by your gratitude and the practice I knew I was getting, which hopefully some of you were able to detect as the word count grew.
> 
> Later on, the creative process was rarely hindered by anxiety. There were moments I wanted to be sure I got things right (although I have a terrible tendency to accidentally screw things up royally in silly yet critical ways, just ask my math teachers). I took to the wiki and aimed to create accuracy with regards to characters and world building. A notable upside to fic writing is that a lot of the story elements are already established, and you are quickly able to garner an audience and a familiarity for what you are writing. After that, you can develop the characters in your own way, add new ones, and explore things that the original story did not. I worked on this entire thing alone, but if you know a skilled person whom you trust not to scoff at your hobby, I advise you talk shop with them and get them to help edit your work.
> 
> Near the homestretch, things can stagnate. Worst case scenario, everybody loses interest entirely, perhaps including you. If not in your fic, then in the entire fandom itself, and you are pretty much aching to be done (this is probably the #1 reason why you see so many deadfics). If you are writing over many months, something is pretty much GURANTEED to get in your way, be it work or tragedy, God forbid. In fact, especially if you've raised your readers' hopes, the weight of the expectations and standards you've set is probably the worst feeling in the whole process next to the anxiety of actually starting (I may try to end it faster, and simply end up writing on top of my mistakes...). These problems are really tricky to solve, and usually require some kind of hiatus. To keep yourself writing, you just have to focus on the support, know the benefits of writing, and hope that the feedback and the feeling of progress and completion will stay rewarding to you. The “creative juices,” as it were, give a refreshing feeling as well. 
> 
> A lot of people handle feedback differently. They may go online and misjudge how thick their skin really is. Even though some “critique” can sound spiteful, hard to interpret, and/or very tempting to ignore, try to keep an open mind. Don't make any drastic changes to your master plan; read some stuff by other people and find out what readers like and don't like in your genre, and try to fix your flaws while being careful not to cave in and lose your own unique appeal. As for critiquing itself, it can be so difficult that you sorta don't blame people for not being able to do it right all the time. I struggle too, but I find it helpful to be as specific as possible while also clearing up what ISN'T wrong, and add some things a writer does well, and generally avoid misinterpretation when getting points across. A good relationship between writer and reader is simply as follows: Don't be offended, try not to offend. EXPECT TROLLS AND DON'T BEAT YOURSELF UP.
> 
> I hope my fanfiction as well as this final note to you all inspires or has inspired a few of you to write something of your own. The fanfiction format is a great place to begin and test your writing abilities. Get out there and generate some feels. 
> 
> FractalMancer signing off.


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